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Pete Rose and Mark McGuire Hold Baseball Commissioner Hostage

Funny story: Pete Rose and Mark McGuire Hold Baseball Commissioner Hostage

Cooperstown, NYIn breaking news, Pete Rose and Mark McGuire, former baseball players, have grabbed baseball commissioner Bud Selig and taken him here to Cooperstown, in an attempt to get themselves put into the Baseball Hall of Fame. Rose of course,...

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Mr. Met Traded to the Cubs For a Year's Supply of Steroids

Funny story: Mr. Met Traded to the Cubs For a Year's Supply of Steroids

Flushing, New York - Desperate to improve a team that has become the laughing stock of major league baseball, the New York Mets have traded their beloved mascot, Mr. Met, to the Chicago Cubs in exchange for a shipment of super steroids. The...

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Major League Baseball Will Begin Using Red Baseballs In 2014

Funny story: Major League Baseball Will Begin Using Red Baseballs In 2014

NEW YORK CITY - Word coming from the office of MLB Commissioner Bud Selig is that MLB will be testing out a red baseball prior to the opening of the 2014 baseball season. The commissioner said that he got the idea from China where professional bas...

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Move over Caligula and Dracula, A-Rod is Here

ON THE CUSP OF EGOMANIA - Never enter a situation where you working with a kookoo bird with a litigation complex. If you are sued by a psychotic with millions of dollars-or even a sociopath with unlimited resources, your time will be squandered.

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Major League Baseball Wants To Put An End To Those Utterly Silly Bench Clearing Brawls

Funny story: Major League Baseball Wants To Put An End To Those Utterly Silly Bench Clearing Brawls

MILWAUKEE - Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig was in Milwaukee visiting a childhood friend when he was approached by Dottie Bazooka with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily. She asked the commissioner if there were any new rules that MLB is...

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A-Rod To Open A Chain Of Cheating Clinics

Funny story: A-Rod To Open A Chain Of Cheating Clinics

Trenton, New Jersey -- Alex Rodriguez plans to put his experience as a professional cheater to work. He announced today the creation of Cheat America, a national network of storefront clinics, providing products and services that help cheaters prospe...

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Yankee shortstop Derek Jeter lost bet and legally changes his name

STUPIDVILLE - It was an unfortunate bet on a fortunate player. New York Yankees shortstop, Derek Jeter found himself in a bad bet likened to O.J. Simpson trouble. Jeter embarrassed by the bet was hoping that he would be forgiven, yet to no avail,...

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Yankees/Tigers playoff games will be played in the 'rain'

Funny story: Yankees/Tigers playoff games will be played in the 'rain'

Detroit, Michigan - The forecast for Detroit is partly cloudy, but the remaining games of the American League Division Series between the New York Yankees and Detroit Tigers will be played in an off and on downpour. The wet weather guarantee is be...

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Roger Clemens Is Furious That All Of This Trial BS Is Costing Him Lots of Money In Commercial Endorsements

Funny story: Roger Clemens Is Furious That All Of This Trial BS Is Costing Him Lots of Money In Commercial Endorsements

WASHINGTON, D.C. - During Roger Clemens illustrious major league baseball career which spanned 24 years he never faced the situation that he is presently facing. The infamous pitcher known as "The Rocket" is getting ready to enter into a perjury t...

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Major League Baseball Bans Spitting

Funny story: Major League Baseball Bans Spitting

In a bold attempt to improve its image, Bud Selig, Commissioner of Major League Baseball, yesterday announced that, effective immediately, spitting has been banned from the sport. "Little old ladies throughout America have long complained about th...

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Major League Baseball to Be Replaced

Funny story: Major League Baseball to Be Replaced

Beginning next year, 2009, the period between the end of March to the beginning of October, for many Americans, will no longer be a time of merriment and great joy. In fact, it could be said that that time frame will be a time of loss, tears, and ma...

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Selig Resigns!

Funny story: Selig Resigns!

NEW YORK - Bud Selig has resigned his post as Commissioner of Major League Baseball. Announcing his retirement before a large gathering of hot dog vendors, batboys, and steroid salesmen, Selig said, "Today, I consider myself the luckiest man...

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United States Stupidity Quotient

The S. Q. increased 16% in the first year of Trump's term of office. It now stands at 69%.
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