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Funny satire stories about blood pressure

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Funny story: Masturbation 'Biggest Factor' in Elvis-style Fatalities

Masturbation 'Biggest Factor' in Elvis-style Fatalities

Self-abuse, coffee, blowing your nose and straining to defecate could increase the risk of of a fatal stroke similar to Elvis Presley's, say researchers in Madrid. Eight risk factors were linked to bleeding on the brain. They all increase blood pr...
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Funny story: Blood Pressure Diagnosis Errors Cause Rise In Blood Pressure

Blood Pressure Diagnosis Errors Cause Rise In Blood Pressure

Doctors and nurses around the country are reporting a sudden rise in patients' blood pressure today. The news follows hard on the heels of reports that millions of people have been wrongly diagnosed with hypertension. Said Dr Liz Stethoscope, o...
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Funny story: Aeroplane Sleepers Risk High Blood Pressure

Aeroplane Sleepers Risk High Blood Pressure

Passengers who sleep on aeroplanes run the risk of developing high blood pressure, and many other life-threatening illnesses that arise from it, says a report published today.
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Funny story: Following Michael Richards' "N-word" Incident, FDA Warns: Salty Crackers Hazardous to Health

Following Michael Richards' "N-word" Incident, FDA Warns: Salty Crackers Hazardous to Health

WASHINGTON, D.C. - In the wake of Michael Richards' infamous "N-word" incident, the United States Food and Drug Administration has issued a new warning: salty crackers may be hazardous to your health.
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Queen of Sheba Susan Rice Demands Hagel's Head

"QueenSheba" Rice had a hissy fit over SecDef Hagel's failure to mouth the Regime's spin on foreign threats. She issued a beheading decree,only deflected by Court Jester "Loony Joe" Biden's ravings.
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