"My weight is nobody's business but mine," huffed the lobster, in an interview with a reporter from The Spoof. The lobster continued, "It's an outrage. How would you like it if YOUR weight were the subject of discussion the world over?"
And he's appalled at all the fat shaming on social media since he's been caught and brought onto land, "Why can't people just mind their own business?" he aske...
HAMILTON, Bermuda - Von Swinks is a hero to the people of Bermuda. Ever since he was 3-years-old he has dreamed of one day going to the Winter Olympics and representing his country in the world games.
Since there was no snow in Bermuda, Swinks fo...
Lindsay Lohan, in another bid to prove she has the best probation on the planet, arrived at LAX to board a plane. As expected there were cameras and paparazzi there to record the event for prosperity.
As Lindsay's SUV pul...
Hamilton, BERMUDA - Emergency relief supplies are headed to the island nation of Bermuda in the North Atlantic Ocean as a once-in-a-lifetime blizzard is quickly crossing the United States. The snow that is blanketing a third of the US is expected to...
President Barack Obama, USA president, announced today that a major issue of concern for this administration will be the Bermuda Triangle and its inexplicable effects on sections of the American economy.
Providing evidence of increasing numbers o...
German scientists have announced that dramatic ice thaws in the North Pole are down not to climate change or any other rational scientific explanation but are caused purely by the Bermuda Triangle.
They explain that the mysterious forces at the h...
A South Florida kingfish tournament was interrupted briefly Monday afternoon, as people stopped to gawk at the island of Bermuda as it rose into the Eastern sky. The island, which appeared to be rising under the force of a gigantic tractor beam, trav...
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Blue tits, lavender tits, silicone tits!
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