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Funny satire stories about alcoholism

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Funny story: Man who gets drunk daily denies that he's an alcoholic

Man who gets drunk daily denies that he's an alcoholic

New York, N.Y. - Drew Dow of Roosevelt Island is an ordinary man with an extraordinary ability: his stomach uses excess yeast in his digestive tract to ferment carbs and sugar-dense foods into alcohol. This rare health condition is called auto-brewer...
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Funny story: Dean R. Koontz

Dean R. Koontz

Dean R. Koontz, known (by colleague and competitor Stephen King) as "the Stephen King of the West Coast," dissociates himself with horror, saying, "To be a horror writer, one must be a horrible writer." He is not to be confused with his fictional alter ego, horror writer Dean Koontz. Koontz was born in Pennsylvania, under a host of pseudonyms, and conceived the plots of his first 33 novels whi...
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Funny story: The Para Lytic Games - Day 3 Report

The Para Lytic Games - Day 3 Report

Drinks all round as Brits hit Gold (Labels) - Four days into the games, and as predicted, the big two teams of Russia and Great Britain are dominating the medal table with five golds each. The shock of day two was the defeat of defending champion...
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Funny story: Scottish Alcoholism is on the decrease - at last!

Scottish Alcoholism is on the decrease - at last!

According to a study, Scots are drinking less alcohol than they were a year ago. Scottish adults still drink (on average) 115% more than their English counterparts, but the drop is encouraging. It now means more Scots are using milk on their cornfla...
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Funny story: Rare Outbreak of Raccoon Alcoholism in Rural Missouri

Rare Outbreak of Raccoon Alcoholism in Rural Missouri

PUXICO, MO- Last weekend a Puxico resident noticed peculiar behavior among some of the furry critters that live on his farm. The raccoons were displaying signs of increased aggression, momentary fatigue, and a lack of hygiene. The local wildlife serv...
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Funny story: My Top 10 Reasons for Drinking Too Much

My Top 10 Reasons for Drinking Too Much

10. According to my horoscope, that's what I was supposed to do. 9. My dad drank too much. 8. My girlfriend drinks too much. 7. Being sober around drunk people sucks. 6. Dry heaves are almost as good as crunches - and that's on top of my smoker's cough! 5. Artists, musicians and writers always drink too much - that's just the way it is. 4. I'm tired of feeling left out. 3. I'm...
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Funny story: Gazza Embarassed By Super Injunction

Gazza Embarassed By Super Injunction

Former England international Paul Gascoigne has revealed he took out a Carlsberg Super Injunction in 2005 to protect his privacy, but admits that it was a mistake. The Geordie, who made 57 appearances for England and scored 10 goals, has been wagi...
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Breaking News...

Dozens of Women Claim Cosby Never Raped Them

Although it's taken since 2006 when rape allegations against Cosby first emerged, his PR firm has managed to find MANY women who encountered Cosby but were never raped by him (to their knowledge).
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