STUBENVILLE, Ohio (ABSNN) - Republican Presidential candidate Mitt Romney responded to the devastation left in the wake of Hurricane Sandy by passing out emergency relief supplies in this mid-sized Ohio city today. Romney praised 47% of the American...
New York - The Carnegie Hill chapter of Filthy Rich Pagans Anonymous is right up Barry's ass over Friday's lunation according to a new hex-messaging service launched today.
A rare and stunning second August Full Moon lights up the heavens in that...
Late last night while taking his regular "constitutional" (Gingrich's preferred term for his nightly moonlight strolls through the woods, the moniker he feels best demonstrates his passionate commitment to the civil rights propagated by our Founding...
DESPICABLE, ME (Wiccan Broadcasting Network) -- The indoor full moon celebration of Isis Mighty Mother Coven last March 8 was interrupted by a scheduled rotating brownout.
It was at 7:30 PM when the power shut off after the circle was cast, the gu...
Colorado Springs - "Silly excuse for naked revelry around a bonfire during the full moon!" is how one scornful US general put it as news of the Pentagon funding broke this week.
However for the US military's motley crew of wiccans, pagans and asso...
London - Astrologers are confident next Monday's feast of Halloween will see the final collapse of the long-running KGB ponzi scam of the Euro.
Some reckon a trillion dollar EU bailout attempt is horribly tainted by bad karma going all the way bac...
London - A silvery sliver of a cirrus cloud filament complete with feathery down-arching end curls blazed a trail at sunset tonight across the waxing Harvest Moon.
The dazzling spectacle exactly mirrored the ancient Egyptian Book of the Dead's Win...
Rome - The Vatican has hijacked Sunday's pagan New Year's Day to beatify a monster exhumed in a public freakshow.
United Grand Coven sources said today veneration of the six year-old corpse - and a 'sacred' vile (sic) of his blood - is typical of...
New York - It's been dubbed Michelle Obama's master grimoire of ovulation rites for dummies - 'something that ex-First Daughter Chelsea Clinton-Lewinsky-Mezvinsky could sorely use right now!'
The first print run hit NYC bookstores this morning and...
New Orleans, LA-- The Obama administration is completely out of ideas about how to stop the oil gusher in the Gulf of Mexico. Someone suggested that witches using White Magick might be used to stop the dreadful oil volcano and heal the sickly Gulf o...
London - (Portents): Her father's bejewelled swastika flag is already draped over a gold-plated coffin of black locustwood, hewn from Regensburg Castle's ariosophic forest.
Tonight, the Windsor chapter of Hellfire Anonymous is on emergency standby...
London - (Maypole): The countdown to Saturday's Pagan New Year's Day sees the Twilight star invited to a Walpurgis Night rave high up on London's Hampstead Heath.
Not to be outdone by Buffy the Vampire Slayer's Cordelia Chase being crowned May Que...
The Cosmos - (Armageddinouttahere!): Wiccas' harshest equivalent of a Federal Emergency Management Agency executive order was issued today.
The astrology warning by the Global Sabbath Council says Monday's Yuletide solstice will will be a monster.
London - (IVF Observer): Followers of pre-Islamic tantric sex goddess and Miss Fertile Crescent 500BC Al-Lat have renamed key dates in the Wiccan lunar calendar ahead of this Friday's apocalyptic Virgo new moon.
The almanac forms the basis of vir...
London - (Ass Mess): London's Non-Aligned Coven of Hotass Witches has issued a red alert for an unprecedented disaster this Wednesday 15 October, the 21st anniversary of the Great Storm.
The day coincides with the communication planet Mercury endi...
New York - (Patriarchal Mess): "The Nazi Pope has soiled America and now he must pay!" This, the grim message of World Council of Wiccans, damning satanic P2 Lodge Pope Ratzinger's contamination of sacred American soil this week.
New documents have surfaced in the world of religion. Specifically, the Wicca religion. The chronicles in question, shed some light on the formation of the "world's oldest religion".
Washington DC - (Cardiac Mess): GOP wannabe presidential nominee John McCain is heading for an imminent fatal coronary according to astrological analysis from the World Wiccan Council AGM at the Du Pont Circle HQ this weekend.