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Funny story:  Captain Wayne Is Mad About Fish Fingers
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Captain Wayne Is Mad About Fish Fingers

Wayne does love his fish-fingers. Ever since he was little he's dreamt of being skipper of a trawler bringing the fresh fish back to port. So in one sense it's a shame football came between him and his lifetime ambition. Had it not been for t...
View 'Wayne Rooney Baby Speaks His First Words'

Wayne Rooney Baby Speaks His First Words

It's every parent's ultimate defining moment, and it was no different for Manchester United and England football star Wayne Rooney and his wife Coleen this week, when their new baby spoke his first word - "Erm". The bouncing baby boy, who the Roon...
Funny story:  Rooney Versus Owen In Domestic WAG War
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Rooney Versus Owen In Domestic WAG War

Manchester: Today: The Rooneys and the Owens have fallen out. Coleen and Louise don't get on after a succession of rows over the garden fence. And now both have ordered their husband to join the battle. The domestic feud has become the talk o...
View 'Footballer Wayne Rooney has a child called Koi'

Footballer Wayne Rooney has a child called Koi

A happy event has occurred in footballer Wayne Rooney's household with the arrival of a child which they have named Koi Carp Rooney. Mr Rooney was said to be totally pleased. Speaking from the photographic studio of KO Magazine and dangling hi...
Funny story:  Colleen Sprouts an Onion. Wayne-ker oblivious.
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Colleen Sprouts an Onion. Wayne-ker oblivious.

A distressed Colleen Shop-A-Lot, aka Mrs Rooney, gave birth completely alone today! Out of sheer concern the Manchester General Hospital urgently rang around to locate the whereabouts of the alleged father. After extensive searching, the hospital...
Funny story:  Wayne and Col Sprog - It's Chinese like!
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Wayne and Col Sprog - It's Chinese like!

Wayne Rooney, anthropoid soccer ace and his well-proportioned spouse Coleen have given birth to a bouncing 8lb 2oz baby boy. Straight between the posts After a couple of false starts, Doctors at the Liverpool Women's Hospital took Coleen aside...

Funny story:  Rooney Baby A Chip Off The Old Block
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Rooney Baby A Chip Off The Old Block

England International and Manchester United star Wayne Rooney today became a proud father for the first time. Wife, Colleen gave birth to a little boy, whom the couple are reported to be naming, Kai Wayne. The couple decided to have the birth in L...
Funny story:  Baby Rooney born with Accrington Stanley logo birthmark
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Baby Rooney born with Accrington Stanley logo birthmark

Liverpool - (Nappydural): "From the waist down he's the living image of his father!" a proud Colleen told reporters as young Kai Wayne made his debut appearance at Liverpool Women's Hospital. "Just don't ask where that Accrington birthmark on his...

Funny story:  Oops! Rooney Names Boy Wayne Car
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Oops! Rooney Names Boy Wayne Car

Mr and Mrs Rooney shocked bookmakers and the world of football today when they failed to call their new baby boy either Nemanja, Alex or Cristiano. Instead, they've settled for Kai which is either a cheap motor car or a subtle variant of KY sex...
Funny story:  Lovesick Cristiano Proposes To Wayne Rooney
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Lovesick Cristiano Proposes To Wayne Rooney

"Never was a story of such woe as this of Wayne and his Cristian-O". With the tragic poetry of star-crossed Romeo and Juliet tearing at his heartstrings, the best player in the World, Cristiano Ronaldo has finally confessed what we've all known for...

Funny story:  Wayne Rooney Distantly Related To John Wayne
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Wayne Rooney Distantly Related To John Wayne

Young Wayne has had plenty of time to think recently. What with Coleen going about with a football stuffed up her jumper and the price of bubble gum going through the ceiling, he's been a star striker with a lot on his mind. The only place for de...
Funny story:  Fabio Capello Operates As A Mafia Boss
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Fabio Capello Operates As A Mafia Boss

Forget last night's irrelevant 0-1 defeat in the grey industrial wastelands of Eastern Ukraine. The whole evening was pre-planned by Fabio Capello who is stopping at nothing to prepare England for victory in next year's World Cup. With England al...

Funny story:  Wayne Rooney Learns To Ride Old Bike
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Wayne Rooney Learns To Ride Old Bike

The last time Wayne tried to ride a bike it all ended in tears. That was five years ago when he was an innocent 18 year old Everton striker and easily the most promising footballer in the country. He'd already become the youngest player ever to p...
Funny story:  Wayne Rooney Thinks Coleen Has A Football Stuffed Up Her Jumper
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Wayne Rooney Thinks Coleen Has A Football Stuffed Up Her Jumper

Carrington: Today - Trauma counsellors representing Manchester United FC have finally taken star striker Wayne Rooney to one side to inform him that he's about to become a father. Rooney had spent most of the week getting to know his strike partn...

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Giant iceberg spotted this summer had shrunk to a smaller iceberg and now laughable little ice cubes that many boats ram into for the fun of it.

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