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Funny satire stories about Wayne LaPierre

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Funny story: NRA Demands That American Government Outlaw Drones Despite The Second Amendment

NRA Demands That American Government Outlaw Drones Despite The Second Amendment

In a strange reversal of policy the NRA has demanded that the U.S. make a ban on drones very much like the ban on guns that they have so heatedly fought against in the past. Speaking at a press conference NRA Fuhrer Wayne LaPierre has vehemently a...
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Funny story: Wallmark to Introduce New Line of Sympathy Cards for Victims of Gun Violence

Wallmark to Introduce New Line of Sympathy Cards for Victims of Gun Violence

KANSAS CITY, MO---The NRA, ever vigilant against liberal, extremist groups who want to take away citizens' right to bear arms, now has an enemy's list. In addition to Wallmark Cards, among its many targets are Britney Spears, the YWCA, AARP, B'nai B...
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Funny story: Gunfight at Open Carry Corral

Gunfight at Open Carry Corral

SAN ANTONIA, TX--A gunfight today broke out between the leader of the Open-Carry Movement, Tex "Small Sack" O'Laury, and the CEO of the National Rifle Association, Wayne "Wacko" LaPierre. The gunfight erupted after a spokesperson for the NRA called...
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Funny story: NRA Succeeds In Taking Over U.S. - Bans All Amendments Except Second

NRA Succeeds In Taking Over U.S. - Bans All Amendments Except Second

The NRA has at last accomplished their goal of taking over the government of what was once was the United States of America. Initiating a ploy that they were rebels against an unfair, repressive political entity, they succeeding in hiding their real...
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Funny story: NRA Calls for SOS (Shoot on Suspicion) Laws Nationwide

NRA Calls for SOS (Shoot on Suspicion) Laws Nationwide

FAIRFAX, VA--In a legal move to avoid having to prove that an armed person felt physically threatened when discharging his weapon, Wayne LaPierre, CEO and Bullshitter-in-Chief for the National Rifle Association, is now calling for SOS, or Shoot on Su...
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Funny story: Obama In Duel With The NRA And LaPierre - Obama Loses!

Obama In Duel With The NRA And LaPierre - Obama Loses!

Many believed it would be a dramatic and historic meeting between President Obama and NRA leader Wayne LaPierre when they met at a press conference in New York this afternoon. After a long standing feud (minus guns but about guns) between the two for...
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Funny story: "I See Dead People!" Causes NRA Fuhrer Wayne LaPierre To Build His Own Winchester House.

"I See Dead People!" Causes NRA Fuhrer Wayne LaPierre To Build His Own Winchester House.

Wayne LaPierre, chief face for the National Rifle Association, has been secretly burdened by the fear of having helped to suppress laws that would have controlled the guns that have been ravaging American society. Knowing that he was instrumental in...
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Funny story: Wayne LaPierre: "Guns Don't Kill People. Crazy Fucks with Guns Kill People."

Wayne LaPierre: "Guns Don't Kill People. Crazy Fucks with Guns Kill People."

Amid renewed talk of more stringent background checks after the latest massacre at the Washington D. C. Navy Yard, Wayne LaPierre was seen walking around the capitol, with his pockets bursting with congressmen and women, quipping to a reporter: "Gun...
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Funny story: Gun Companies Realize More Profit Made Being Patriotic To The Taliban Than To The U.S.

Gun Companies Realize More Profit Made Being Patriotic To The Taliban Than To The U.S.

A major financial shift has occurred within the gun manufacturing section of the United States Corporate industry. A huge surge has come about in the number of guns and ammunition being clandestinely sold to the Mid East terror organization Al Queda.
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Funny story: Florida OKs Hand Grenades for "Stand-Your-Ground" Defense

Florida OKs Hand Grenades for "Stand-Your-Ground" Defense

Special to TPN - Florida Governor Rick Scott today signed into law an expansion of his state's controversial "Stand-Your-Ground" statute 776.013. Those with so-called "carry" permits for handguns will be allowed to conceal on their persons not more t...
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Funny story: Looking at NRA's LaPierre As a Child Explains His Present Day Extremism

Looking at NRA's LaPierre As a Child Explains His Present Day Extremism

A recent biography of NRA Fuhrer Wayne LaPierre shows light on his character that reveals why he is so rabid on the topic of gun control. The President of Vice of the largest gun organization has been often in the news lately due to his extremist anti-governmental outlook and his opposition to any and all laws on firearms. The new book entitled 'LaPierre- Assault Mouth', contains the following...
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Funny story: With Much Fanfare, the NRA Releases Its Version of the New Testament

With Much Fanfare, the NRA Releases Its Version of the New Testament

The NRA today released its new translation of the New Testament, based heavily on the King James Version. Said NRA CEO Wayne LaPierre of the new translation: "We believe this new version of the New Testament will more accurately reflect the Second Amendment principles the United States and the nation of Israel were founded upon." What follows is an excerpt from the new translation, called,...
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Funny story: "Armageddon---Half the fun is getting there," says LaPierre

"Armageddon---Half the fun is getting there," says LaPierre

Wayne LaPierre, Chairman of the NRA spoke to a wildly enthusiastic crowd of supporters over the weekend. Speaking in front of a US flag as big as the state of Kansas, LaPierre exhorted his supporters to, "Stand up, put your baseball caps on backwards...
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Funny story: North Korean Leader Kim Jong Un Steps Up As New Spokesman For NRA

North Korean Leader Kim Jong Un Steps Up As New Spokesman For NRA

In need of a new spokesman so fiery he can burn people with his tongue alone and can intimidate a whole nation, the NRA has chosen North Korean leader Kim Jong Un to replace the nerdy Wayne LaPierre as their propaganda head. The NRA has long looked f...
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Funny story: Wayne LaPierre Ousted As Representative Of NRA For Being Too 'Frenchy'.

Wayne LaPierre Ousted As Representative Of NRA For Being Too 'Frenchy'.

Wayne LaPierre, outspoken mouthpiece of the NRA has been removed from his position of Vice-President due to a large number of powerful members of the organization being opposed to his having 'too Frenchy' a name. John Howitzer, Montana rancher and...
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Funny story: NRA Holds America Hostage, Is Holed Up In Building Surrounded By Police

NRA Holds America Hostage, Is Holed Up In Building Surrounded By Police

Two narrowed eyes peeked out of the slats over the window that were already narrow enough by themselves. They gazed imperturbably at the scores of police and FBI agents that surrounded the NRA ranch estate in North Carolina. Those eyes belong to Wayn...
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Funny story: National Rat Association Wants To Disassociate Itself From NRA

National Rat Association Wants To Disassociate Itself From NRA

The National Rat Association, an organization created and run by the rat population of the United States of America, is doing a big publicity campaign to disassociate itself from the notorious National Rifle Association who share the same abbreviated...
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Funny story: NRA To Use Making 'Puppy Eyes' A New Tactic To Ingratiate Themselves With The American Public

NRA To Use Making 'Puppy Eyes' A New Tactic To Ingratiate Themselves With The American Public

The NRA in its constant quest for keeping up a good image of itself, keeping guns in as many hands as possible, controlling the minds of the public and keeping a stranglehold on Congress has developed a new methodology for its dealing with the public...
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