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Funny satire stories about Vegetarianism

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Funny story: New Study Shows Blood of Newborn Babies Is Harmful to Health and the Environment

New Study Shows Blood of Newborn Babies Is Harmful to Health and the Environment

Breaking research from the public interest group Consumers Committee for Responsible Consumption (CCRC) shows that the blood of newborn babies, long-touted for its high iron content and other supposed health benefits, is actually detrimental not only...
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Funny story: Vegetarian restaurants to be banned

Vegetarian restaurants to be banned

Thanks to a one-man campaign by gourmet chef Roland Dough, vegetarian restaurants are about to be banned throughout Europe. In actual fact, they will only need to serve one non-vegetarian dish to comply with the new regulations, but that will effecti...
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Funny story: Fast-Food Labeling Law To Begin, Must Include Obituary Of Dead Animal

Fast-Food Labeling Law To Begin, Must Include Obituary Of Dead Animal

New York, NY-- A controversial fast-food labeling law is about to begin on July 1 in New York City. All fast-food burgers will be required to give an obituary of the dead animal being served to their customers. The death notice will include the cre...
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Funny story: Meat eaters lie, are sex mad and need prostitutes!

Meat eaters lie, are sex mad and need prostitutes!

Indian vegetarians have discovered that since McDonalds opened a chain of veggy restaurants in the country sex crimes have been reduced by 25% and men lying to their wives has radically been reduced by 50%! Non-consumption of meat products tends t...
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Funny story: Vegetarians call for a Bacon Ban

Vegetarians call for a Bacon Ban

Vegetarians based in Altrincham, Cheshire, have asked for a complete ban on bacon following the alarming news that more vegetarians have fallen off the wagon due to thinly sliced meat than for any other reason. "It's the smell of cooking bacon," s...
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Funny story: Bill Clinton Promotes Hitler-Style Vegetarianism at World Rodeo Convention

Bill Clinton Promotes Hitler-Style Vegetarianism at World Rodeo Convention

Many rodeo-goers expressed surprise, even shock, at the announcement that former United States president Bill Clinton would be the keynote speaker at the 2012 World Rodeo Convention in Houston, Texas. For one, media sources have in recent years repor...
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Funny story: Ipswich Man Wins Right to Eat Cat

Ipswich Man Wins Right to Eat Cat

An East Anglian man has been given the all clear by the High Court in London to eat his pet cat paving the way for more Britons to cook, fry, boil and roast their pets. The landmark decision is seen as triumph for civil liberties claim many watche...
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Funny story: The Mystery of The Man-Eating Hedge Pt I

The Mystery of The Man-Eating Hedge Pt I

The Conundrum Club, London, 1895 Colonel Gulper (CG): This Carpetbag Steak's damned chewy, what? Reverend Milke (RM): With respect, Colonel, that is a carpetbag you've got on your plate. CG: What? Of course it's a carpetbag, you fool. I just said it was a carpetbag, a deuced chewy one, or are you going deaf in your old age, Reverend, what? RM: No, Colonel, that is a bag, a carpet bag.
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Funny story: Unfit, Overweight Vegetarian and Vegan Inspire Millions of Americans to Go Veg

Unfit, Overweight Vegetarian and Vegan Inspire Millions of Americans to Go Veg

Ingrid Newkirk, President of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), and Kevin Lawson, President of the National Vegetarian Society, knew they needed a new approach to recruiting new vegetarians and vegans. "Americans weren't relating...
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Funny story: Evolution Takes GIANT Leap Forward: NY Cat Turns Vegan!

Evolution Takes GIANT Leap Forward: NY Cat Turns Vegan!

What if the law of the jungle were also the law of kindness, compassion, and love? Well, if East Village kitty Sammy Mesda has anything to do with it, one day it very well could be. Sammy, whose blackness, litheness, and sleekness can only call...
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Funny story: Romney Urges Americans to Eat More Red Meat

Romney Urges Americans to Eat More Red Meat

In an effort to solidify support in the Midwest, Mitt Romney held a press conference in Jefferson City, Missouri, to address what he called a "glaring gap" in Republican policy: nutrition. Romney told carnivorous voters that Missouri, the second-lead...
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Funny story: New vegetarian muesli set to hit shelves soon

New vegetarian muesli set to hit shelves soon

The makers of the Alpine brand of muesli have announced that they will soon be producing a vegetarian version of their famous muesli breakfast cereal. Whereas standard Alpine, and indeed most makes of muesli contain approximately two percent meat pr...
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Funny story: Vegetarian Rage As Harry Styles Out Of One Direction Papped Eating Meat Pie In Dorking

Vegetarian Rage As Harry Styles Out Of One Direction Papped Eating Meat Pie In Dorking

Vegetarians the length and breadth of the nation were up in arms following the publication of photographs clearly showing Harry out of One Direction tucking into a Tesco's minced beef and onion pie in Dorking. High profile foodies blame Harry's sp...
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Funny story: Disclaimers and Vegetarians - My Opinion

Disclaimers and Vegetarians - My Opinion

Sometimes you'll see the disclaimer, "No animals were harmed during the making of this film", at the end of a movie. I think that's a rather bold statement. I'm watching the movie thinking, "I know for a fact around the time they were making this movie that I ran over a squirrel and accidentally locked my cat in a closet over a weekend." Did they have a crew go out and survey people? They s...
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Funny story: Vegetarian Week Begins

Vegetarian Week Begins

Hippies and smug food fascists everywhere began celebrating National Vegetarian Week today. I caught up with a vegetarian festival being held in Islington, London and was just in time to see the sponsored Gloat-a-thon. Many people were promising to g...
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Funny story: Vindaloo Eater Murdered in Street Brawl

Vindaloo Eater Murdered in Street Brawl

London: A number of people have been arrested at a Hare Krishna restaurant late last night in connection with the murder of an innocent bystander who was set upon by diners in what appears to have been an unprovoked attack. One witness, a girl, s...
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Funny story: Paul McCartney urges India to declare Vegetarian day as meat-eating Kashmiris pelt him with Holy Cow patties

Paul McCartney urges India to declare Vegetarian day as meat-eating Kashmiris pelt him with Holy Cow patties

Londonistan, Islamic capital of Englanistan: With no new hits on the horizon and no obsessed new wife with crazy causes to lead him by the nose, aging Beatle Paul McCartney is back to re-hashing old issues. Yesterday he urged India to declare a nati...
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Funny story: Vegetarian Freaks Out - Orders Bacon Sandwich Then Goes On Meat Binge

Vegetarian Freaks Out - Orders Bacon Sandwich Then Goes On Meat Binge

Local kebab shop and burger van entrepeneur, Ali Bullo today related how a passing staunch vegetarian lost the plot and ordered a bacon sandwich from a burger van parked by Swanwick railway station in deepest Hampshire. According to reports, the v...
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Breaking News...

Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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