Shocking results of a new study that looked at the effects of diet on life span are shaking up dieticians and health care workers worldwide. Published in the March Journal of Diet and Health Environment, the study showed that there is an undeniable...
Local farmer Arthur Choke, better known as Artie, caused a stir at the annual Edinburgh vegetable show yesterday.
Farmer Choke, famed for his prize giant cucumbers, withdrew his competition entry, drawing speculation from other competitors.
Whe...
Dentists across the UK are opposed to government measures to increase the so-called 5-a-day, and want the opposite.
"We need Britons to reduce to three a day, or even two a day," said Denby Twist of the Dorking Dentistry School. "The last thing we...
Horatio Hepplewhite, a cabbage farmer from Lincolnshire has resorted to holding out a begging bowl in the streets of London, following this year's catastrophic cabbage crop failure.
"I was expecting to harvest about a hundred tons of cabbages," He...
Environmentalists and farmers issued an ominous statement on Sunday, to the effect that not only is the UK facing a double dip recession, but the nation is also likely to be blighted by a serious shortage of cabbages.
One observer cited a shortage...
Worcestershire - Autumn gales have battered the ancient Spa town famous for its Dead Sea-comparable salinity and carnal - er..canal! - marina developments.
This morning 75mp gusts decimated the local allotment society's show gardens sending severa...
A Dorking vegetable grower has barricaded himself in his garden shed after being accused of stealing rhubarb from an adjoining allotment.
Retired maths teacher Cyril Nonce, aged 88, had been reported to the police by his vigilant next door neighbo...
The British government has come up with a unique plan to raise funds by adding a Calorie Added Tax to all food stuff. This CAT is directly related to the calorie content of food such that one calorie equals one pence.
Whilst this will have little...
There is so much un-used space at Whitehall HQ that Eric Pickles has come up with a marvellous idea to rent the space to be used as a huge food hall.
Apparently, he plans to rent some of the space himself and set up a new business, to be named Pic...
A mutant Cauliflower is striking fear and horror into every section of the community.
'This is a new type of cauliflower' said Prof Dumble 'it can walk and jump at you when you are not looking!'
This dreadful being grasps your stomach and turn...
As a result of the recent deaths caused by tainted cucumbers, Health Organizations world-wide are encouraging people to switch to eating courgettes.
This, sometimes ignored vegetable, is a great substitute in any recipe calling for cucumbers.
C...
In the light of the recent Cucumber attacks in Germany we understand that tests and experiments are being carried out in secret, using vegetables.
Using minority groups as test subjects, they are being exposed to various vegetables being used with...
Fresh from the controversy over the scientific rebranding of aubergines, peppers, tomatoes and cucumbers as fruit that forced a major reshuffle in supermarkets around the country, scientists have now announced that broccoli is not a vegetable either.
Mad Rocker Pete Doherty has been arrested after breaking into a record shop in the Bavarian town of Regensburg in Germany.
The former Libertines & Babyshambles frontman was caught stealing a bundle of records and also a guitar. An eye-witness...
A recent survey carried out by Girl Play magazine has revealed a liking of fruit and vegetables as sex toys among sexually active and adventurous women.
"The most popular vegetable was the carrot," said magazine editor, Andrea Fuller. "Women repor...
Nutritionists working for the Government's Ministry of Health and Safety have announced that the current recommendation of five portions of fruit and veg a day is not enough and it should be raised to eight or nine a day.
"We have found that a dec...
The Whistle Blowing website, WikiLeaks, run by Australian Swedish Lady Lover, Julian Assange, is to be taken down and re-branded as a site about vegetables.
"Instead of all this troublesome leaking of national secrets," said Assange, "we are going...
The Welsh Assembly met in emergency session due to the activities of WillyLeeks a website giving all the information about Wales not in the Travel Guide. A Protest was made to United Nations at the sabotage of Welsh Leeks.
Among the astonishing re...