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Funny story:  "Understanding" Commuters tell train driver not to apologise about delays

"Understanding" Commuters tell train driver not to apologise about delays

Train driver Mohammad O'Toole expressed his relief today and praised the commuters on the 8.13am to Birmingham New Street train for being so understanding after he announced delays would mean they would get in 30 minutes late to their destination.
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Funny story:  Royal Navy exercises restraint during Spanish "Kamikaze" Gibraltar incursions

Royal Navy exercises restraint during Spanish "Kamikaze" Gibraltar incursions

Royal Navy manoeuvres involving aerial military "drops" were completed this week according to plan despite the farcical behaviour of a small number of rickety Spanish boats. Having to be shepherded away for their own safety, the humiliated Spanish "p...
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Funny story:  100MPH winds batter the UK and Cameron dons his favourite designer wellies!

100MPH winds batter the UK and Cameron dons his favourite designer wellies!

The UK has and is still being battered by storms, floods and 100MPH winds, but there is a saviour in sight. PM David Cameron has been sighted on a non-existent 'dyke' wearing his designer wellies promising to plug it and she loved every second! He...
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Funny story:  Britain chooses indecisive pacifism

Britain chooses indecisive pacifism

In a vote that will have little consequence for the rest of the world, the British parliament have agreed by a narrow margin that they will stand idly by while President Assad of Syria gases his own people. "I'm very proud of this moment," said Pr...
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Funny story:  Nostalgic Television: "Get Smart"

Nostalgic Television: "Get Smart"

Get Maxwell Don Adams Smart, or Get Smart, as it was called for short, celebrated the U. S. Central Intelligence Agency. It starred Maxwell Don Adams Smart, an actual CIA agent who loved numbers, particularly 99. The series was designed to showcase the efficiency and sophistication of U. S. federal bureaucracies and to make Americans feel safe and happy to part with the millions of dollars in taxe...
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Funny story:  Rupert Giles

Rupert Giles

Rupert Giles studied at Oxford University, but dropped out before earning a history degree to become a voyeur, or "watcher," as his father and grandmother Edna had been before him. Rather than taking his wayward son to task for wasting what could have been a superb education at one of the world's leading universities, Giles' father approved of his decision, affirming it as a fulfillment of his "de...
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Funny story:  UK Government to Reintroduce Window Tax

UK Government to Reintroduce Window Tax

In a leaked document, made public by one of Britain's major newspapers earlier this week, it appears that the government, far from abolishing the so-called bedroom tax, is getting ready to reintroduce the window tax, last seen in the 18th and 19th ce...
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Funny story:  Mass global depression ahead of World Snooker Championships

Mass global depression ahead of World Snooker Championships

Millions of people around the world have declared themselves clinically depressed at the thought of accidentally switching the channel over to this year's World Snooker Championships. An unofficial survey of semi-official, machine-washable televis...
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Funny story:  Benefit changes come into effect

Benefit changes come into effect

Across the UK there was outrage today among benefit fans, when long-expected changes to the benefits system came into place. "I'm outraged," said deceased political activist Spencer Perceval. "This has completely destroyed the benefits system as we know it. Don't they realise that by making small changes that I barely understand but completely disapprove of, the system will cease to exist at al...
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Funny story:  Illegal immigrants paying to get out of UK not in!

Illegal immigrants paying to get out of UK not in!

After years of attempting to smuggle themselves into Britain many illegal immigrants are now paying people smugglers to get them out of the damn place! Britain was once the 'Golden Fleece" for many illegals because they thought that gold and silve...
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Funny story:  UK Says Battering Ram Not Likely In Assange Case

UK Says Battering Ram Not Likely In Assange Case

UK officials insist they are not considering a battering ram against the front door of Ecuador's embassy in London, where Julian Assange's asylum has recently been extended to the country of Ecuador itself. It's important, UK officials say, to no...
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Funny story:  Scotland Wants Own Olympic Team

Scotland Wants Own Olympic Team

Scotland's outspoken and opinionated First Minister, Alex Salmond, has courted controversy by insisting Scotland will field its own Olympic team at the 2016 Rio Games. Salmond, who is convinced Scotland will have departed the UK by 2016, has insis...
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Funny story:  Selected Political News for W/E 29th July 2012 - with comments

Selected Political News for W/E 29th July 2012 - with comments

Monday 22nd July 2012 Topic: "I'd form a new coalition with Ed Miliband: Nick Clegg says he's open to working with Labour" Source: The People Extract: Nick Clegg would form a coalition with Ed Miliband in the next government, he told The People. The Lib Dem leader could even stay on as Deputy PM if a general election ­replaced one governing party with another. His new boss would...
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Funny story:  Conference North to be re-branded Conference UK

Conference North to be re-branded Conference UK

The sixth level of English Football, the Conference North, is to be re-branded as the Conference UK after teams from Oxford and Cambridge were added to the cannon of clubs partaking in the division. "We had a couple of teams from just north of Lon...
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Funny story:  Lords Reform expose poor casting to play out Lucas epic

Lords Reform expose poor casting to play out Lucas epic

Throughout the corridors of power it is well known that the Prime Minister idolises the Star Wars antagonist Lord Vader and for some time many backbenchers have feared this obsession would play out in party politics. Fourteen months since getting...
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Funny story:  Summer is here again; whiplash winds, storms and gales!

Summer is here again; whiplash winds, storms and gales!

After enduring a long, wet, windy horrible winter and spring, summer has arrived to relieve the northern half of Europe from its misery. The only problem is; there is more of the wet, windy, horrible weather hitting the shores of Britain and Northen...
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Funny story:  Urgent Anglo German Leadership Meeting Ends in Calls for more Urgency

Urgent Anglo German Leadership Meeting Ends in Calls for more Urgency

Chancellor Angela Merkel and Prime Minister David Cameron have clashed this afternoon in Berlin over the Euro Zone crisis. The British Prime Minister, arrived in Berlin for an urgent meeting to urge Angela Merkel to quickly sort out the Euro Zone...
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Funny story:  Scotland to be kicked out of UK

Scotland to be kicked out of UK

Scotland is to be ejected from the UK. In a totally unforeseen step, David Cameron has decided that Britain might do all right without Scotland after all. "The Scots have routinely expressed contempt for the rest of the UK, especially the English...
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True Facts From Snoops #1335

Snoops: The average number of toothpicks people swallow in their lifetime? Three. Mostly from laughing after dinner.

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