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Funny satire stories about Turtles

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Funny story: Disabled Tortoise Saved from Rubbish Tip

Disabled Tortoise Saved from Rubbish Tip

A 30-year-old disabled tortoise (ingrown toenails and harelip) unwittingly sent to a landfill site with its owner's rubbish, has been found alive. Sheldrake, a greater-crested Galapagos tortoise, owned by Gladys Hawksbill of Margate in Kent, clim...
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Funny story: Turtles are excellent indicators of the effects of financial climate change

Turtles are excellent indicators of the effects of financial climate change

The fact that marine turtles are emerging healthy and buying stock is an excellent indicator of how the effects of the credit and subprime mortgage crises might ultimately effect people, especially those living in the coastline tourist and travel des...
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Funny story: Pacific Turtle Tracked 13,000 Miles

Pacific Turtle Tracked 13,000 Miles

Scientists from the US National Marine Fisheries Service report that a leatherback turtle which they equipped with a tracking device migrated from Indonesia to Oregon to Hawaii, total of 13,000 miles. The amazing migration took about 2 years.
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Funny story: Giant Tortoise found washed up on Cornish Beach

Giant Tortoise found washed up on Cornish Beach

Walking on a beach these days, you can find almost anything; buckets, spades, motorcycles, chocolate biscuits, wooden decking, seaweed and even condoms. Much of these items come from an alarming rise in shipwrecks these days. Many of...
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Funny story: Survivorman Rides Giant Turtle to Safety

Survivorman Rides Giant Turtle to Safety

Lake Okeechobee, Florida (IP) - Survivor man Les Stroud jumped on the back of a 20 foot wide cooter turtle and rode it to safety in Lake Okeechobee last night. He had been filming a Survivorman episode on the west set of the lake near Indian Prairie...
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Funny story: The Race is not Over Yet

The Race is not Over Yet

Heads up, animal lovers, you finally have a presidential candidate you can whole heartedly support. Unfortunately, Trevor the Turtle has entered the 2000 presidential race.
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Funny story: TMNT protested by PETA, protested by AI, protested by ACLU, protested by CCA, protested by AU, protested by Rev. Phelps

TMNT protested by PETA, protested by AI, protested by ACLU, protested by CCA, protested by AU, protested by Rev. Phelps

TMNT, the new CGI movie based on the comic book "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" opened to throngs of protesters of all persuasions, most of whom were protesting each other.
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Funny story: Turtles thwart terror plot

Turtles thwart terror plot

ISLAMIC militants today were arrested in the sewers of New York City after a terror plot to blow up Madison Square Garden was foiled by unknown crime fighters.
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Dozens of Women Claim Cosby Never Raped Them

Although it's taken since 2006 when rape allegations against Cosby first emerged, his PR firm has managed to find MANY women who encountered Cosby but were never raped by him (to their knowledge).
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