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Funny satire stories about Tom Cruise

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Jack Reach Around is Third Movie in Reacher Series

Funny story: Jack Reach Around is Third Movie in Reacher Series

Jack Reacher returns to the screen in the third movie adaptation of a Lee Child novel. Leading man, Tom Cruise, takes us on a scary ride in this much darker and grittier follow up to the popular series. !Spoiler Alert! This time, in Jack Reach...

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Pitt and Jolie to Become ABC's First Celebrity Bachelor/Bachelorette

Funny story: Pitt and Jolie to Become ABC's First Celebrity Bachelor/Bachelorette

Hollywood, CA - Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have agreed to become the first "celebrity" bachelor and bachelorette on the aging television series of the same name, which will feature only divorced celebrities vying to fall in love with the famous cou...

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Celebs ticked at Porn Knock-Offs

Funny story: Celebs ticked at Porn Knock-Offs

Two, to be exact: Tom Cruise and Denzel Washington. Tom Cruise, out promoting his latest "Jack Reacher" fare on the Ricki Lake show, grew furious when he found out there's a new nudie flick called "Jack Reach-around-er", which caters to Gay men.

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First Charisma Awards Competition

Funny story: First Charisma Awards Competition

Hiram Grabbit of Los Angeles PR firm, LUXIFER INC., has set up what could be a global, national contest to rival Miss World and The Oscars. Luxifer has, in the past, worked closely with Scratchi and Scratchi of London in the business of cultivat...

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USA Hijacked By NRA

Funny story: USA Hijacked By NRA

The United States' been hijacked by the National Rifle Association. Not as dramatic as the Orson Welles radio broadcast, War of the Worlds, but it's pretty much a done deal. The NRA managed the hijack by making campaign contributions to Republican me...

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Tom Cruise Tells North Dakota High School Class "You Can Do It!"

Funny story: Tom Cruise Tells North Dakota High School Class "You Can Do It!"

Shit City, North Dakota - Celebrity Tom Cruise likes to give back. Having given millions of dollars to homeless men and women throughout Canada and New Zealand, the actor says he now wishes to "deign to condescend to backwoods hicks" and has schedul...

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Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise to Star Again

Funny story: Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise to Star Again

The film soon to be released "Blood on a White Rose" is already being forecast to clean up at next year's Oscars. It is a drama with class and style. One critic said, "If it were a painting it would be a Raphael." The film teams up, for one more...

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Uh-Oh. Another Hollywood Open Secret Bites The Uhhhh......Dust

Funny story: Uh-Oh. Another Hollywood Open Secret Bites The Uhhhh......Dust

LOS ANGELES - Due no doubt to the ongoing public domained enquiring mind-wise fascination surrounding anything to do with however it was (if only just because) recently defamed (and rightly so) high end comedy legend Bill Cosby apparently had to...

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Russian Jets Enter Ukraine Airspace, Top Gun's Maverick Dispatched to Region

Washington, D.C. - As tensions continue to escalate between Russia and Ukraine, Russian President Putin has ordered his fighter jet pilots to flirt with crossing into Ukrainian airspace to tempt a response from the smaller country. In respons...

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'A Zimmer frame sequel?' Kelly McGillis demands amid reports Tom Cruise will star in Top Gun 2

Funny story: 'A Zimmer frame sequel?' Kelly McGillis demands amid reports Tom Cruise will star in Top Gun 2

New York - "Sure I've turned down the role of Charlie Blackwood," Ms McGillis told New York Toast reporters today, "still recovering from a dose of intimate hives after Cruise's last clinch 30 years ago." The 1986 box orifice smash-hit raked in a...

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Katie Holmes Fires One Of Her Bodyguards

NEW YORK CITY - Word out of the Big Apple is that Tom Cruise's ex-wife Katie Holmes has fired one of her two bodyguards. According to a reliale inside source, Rocco Stampafelli, who has been Katie's bodyguard for over a year was let go. It seem...

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Greta Van Susteren finds clarity

WHITEWASHINGTON, DC - Scientologist and Fox News "hostess with the mostest," Greta Van Susteren cleared the air recently by challenging her male colleagues' belief in the natural superiority of men over women. "Have these idiots lost their minds?...

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Tom Cruise to Ditch Scientology for Children of God

Funny story: Tom Cruise to Ditch Scientology for Children of God

Tom Cruise announced today that he was quitting the Church of Scientology to join the Children of God. The Children of God, who also call themselves Family International or Family of Love, have long been known as kind of a Christian sex cult, who be...

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Tom Cruise has sense of smell removed; science says, "Smell is effeminate."

Funny story: Tom Cruise has sense of smell removed; science says, "Smell is effeminate."

HOLLYWOOD, CA - Actor, producer, and World-renowned movie star Tom Cruise underwent a rare elective surgery last Thursday at Cedar Sinai in Los Angeles. Mr. Cruise had his sense of smell removed; this comes after the National Science Foundation m...

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New L Ron Hubbard temple gives credence to Clearwater Scientology revival

Funny story: New L Ron Hubbard temple gives credence to Clearwater Scientology revival

Clearwater, Florida - Looking more like a massive concrete aircraft hangar than a new age brainwashing machine the brutalist, $150 million erection has been greeted cautiously as a shot in the arm for the local economy by Clearwater mayor Bud Boodeek...

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American Soldiers in Afghanistan liken tour to a Tom Cruise filming gig

Funny story: American Soldiers in Afghanistan liken tour to a Tom Cruise filming gig

KABUL - Many American solidiers currently on a one-year tour in Afghanistan find that their time spent away from family and other loved ones is most comparable a drawn-out movie shoot of an actor of such caliber as Tom Cruise. "Risking our lives d...

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Sources Confirm Katie Holmes Not "Hunting Foxxes" But "Picking Willows"

Insiders have revealed new developments in recent rumors surrounding Katie Holmes and her alleged romance with Actor Jamie Foxx. Katie Holmes stated publicly this week that "Jamie and I are close. He is a wonderful confidant and we have become g...

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Katie Holmes Confesses That New Boyfriend Jamie Foxx Is 10 Times More Fun Than Ex-Husband Tom Cruise Was

Funny story: Katie Holmes Confesses That New Boyfriend Jamie Foxx Is 10 Times More Fun Than Ex-Husband Tom Cruise Was

NEW YORK CITY - Sweet little Katie Holmes is thrilled at the fact that she has a new boyfriend. Holmes is reportedly on Cloud 9 since she has been hitting the dating scene with Jamie Foxx star of Django Unchained. The 34-year-old brunette pixie...

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United States Stupidity Quotient

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