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Funny satire stories about Toilet Paper

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Funny story: Liam Helmsworth Not Brightest Bulb On The tree!

Liam Helmsworth Not Brightest Bulb On The tree!

Australian Liam Helmsworth may be a fairly good actor but his brothers say that he sometimes has trouble over simple things. Of course, several caught onto that when he went to live with Miley Cyrus who acted like nothing was really going on there...
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Funny story: Venezuela Takes No Sheet in Toilet Paper Crisis

Venezuela Takes No Sheet in Toilet Paper Crisis

Venezuela has instituted a series of emergency laws in the face of the national toilet paper shortage. Besides ordering the Venezuelan Army to assume control of the only toilet paper factory in the country, President Nicolas Maduro has ruled that no...
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Funny story: First lady agrees to green derriere reduction

First lady agrees to green derriere reduction

WASHINGTON DC - The First Lady agreed today to have her derriere reduced in size by 75 percent via plastic surgery to be green. According to press under-secretary, Toid D. Phlush, the First Lady got the idea when she heard about whole forests bei...
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Funny story: 5 out of 7 women use supermarket own brand toilet paper

5 out of 7 women use supermarket own brand toilet paper

A new study has found that, far from the luxury lifestyle women puport to have, the ladies of today are more than happy to clear away their business with own-brand low-grade toilet roll. Out of all women asked in the survey 3 were happy to tell u...
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Funny story: What will I wipe it with?

What will I wipe it with?

As the world recession deepens there is even worse news; toilet rolls are running low and in some places there's only a year or two of supplies left. Manufacturers are working hard to find an alternative but so far, they've come up with nothing. "...
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Funny story: Charmin to Commemorate Sears Catalogue With Special Toilet Paper

Charmin to Commemorate Sears Catalogue With Special Toilet Paper

Charmin Bathroom Tissue will issue a special commemorative toilet paper next month in honor of the Sears Catalogue. The toilet paper manufacturer said that this will be their first special edition and will be a rarity for them as they normally "stick...
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Funny story: Chinese government uses political prisoners to manufacture Royal Wedding Lavatory Paper

Chinese government uses political prisoners to manufacture Royal Wedding Lavatory Paper

Just imagine it...wiping the old backside with royal faces...gives new meaning to Kiss me Arse! Always in the rush to make a fast buck, Chinese manufacturers are cashing in on the British royal wedding by rolling out bales of Royal Wedding lavator...
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Funny story: US Treasury Forced to buy more North Korean Counterfeit Notes as 1.1B New Bills Flawed!

US Treasury Forced to buy more North Korean Counterfeit Notes as 1.1B New Bills Flawed!

After spending $120M to print brand new 'counterfeit proof' new $100 notes at twice the old price, the Treasury was forced to admit today they were scrapping all 1.1 Billion of them due to a printing error! The error was not caught during the tre...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin Blames Toilet Paper Shortage in California on President Obama

Sarah Palin Blames Toilet Paper Shortage in California on President Obama

The Sarah Palin Blame Game is revving up full steam ahead against anything remotely to do or not to do with this country's beleaguered President. Palin learned early on that taking swipes at the current administration is good for her public image eve...
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Funny story: Local man in war of attrition over toilet roll with flatmate.

Local man in war of attrition over toilet roll with flatmate.

A local man has been left reeling and shell shocked following an all out attempt by his flat mate to not change the toilet roll in the shared bathroom of their house this evening. The trouble all began earlier today when the unnamed house sharer,...
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Funny story: Local mans finger goes through toilet paper.

Local mans finger goes through toilet paper.

A local man is said to be in a stable condition today after having been pulled from the jaws of almost uncertain death, but very certain need for antibacterial hand wash, following a toilet roll purchase, mix up, type confusion. The young man in q...
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Funny story: Mel Gibson Writes Toilet Paper Check to Grigorieva for Child Support

Mel Gibson Writes Toilet Paper Check to Grigorieva for Child Support

Mel Gibson, recently ordered to start paying the mother of his child an additional $15,000 a month in child support, decided to take the opportunity to show Grigorieva just how much he disliked the idea and penned a check on his personal checking acc...
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Funny story: Local woman runs out of toilet roll

Local woman runs out of toilet roll

In Local news, a recently local woman is said to be in a stable condition following a shopping related mishap, where she inadvertently neglected to purchase supplies of her usual toilet tissue. It is reported however that she had purchased a larg...
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Funny story: Newark Nixes Toilet Paper in City Buildings

Newark Nixes Toilet Paper in City Buildings

Residents of Newark, New Jersey, were shocked this week when their mayor, Cory Booker, announced that, due to a budget crisis, toilet paper would no longer be supplied to city buildings. Uh-oh. Entrepreneurial street vendors immediately ordered b...
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Funny story: Toilet Paper Bandit Caught!

Toilet Paper Bandit Caught!

Known as "The Toilet Paper Bandit", police in Little Rock, Arkansas believe they finally have the man in custody. "The man who always covered his face with toilet paper before a robbery seems to be the guy we arrested today", stated Sheriff Bill F...
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Funny story: Toilet Paper shortage leads to some Brits adopting hands-on approach

Toilet Paper shortage leads to some Brits adopting hands-on approach

Egyptian authorities have been looking for a way to curb a severe paper shortage that has plagued the country for almost 7 months. Shipments of tissue paper products have been suspended by a long-running strike by unions in the US and in South Americ...
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Funny story: Blair's speeches and books to be turned into toilet roll

Blair's speeches and books to be turned into toilet roll

Speeches and books by Tony Blair have to be turned into toilet roll and then it would at least serve some purpose. Japanese Scientists have invented a machine that turns A4 paper into toilet paper. The machine is six feet tall and weighs in at 94...
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Funny story: Glow-in-the-dark loo paper 'could replace bulbs'

Glow-in-the-dark loo paper 'could replace bulbs'

Cardiff - (Bum Rap): A Welsh company has been given a £454,000 grant from the Carbon Truss to develop new technology to make glow-in-the-dark toilet paper. The CEO of the Welsh Bot Wipe Corp said today that using an electrical current to stimulate...
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Obama... Ordinary like us.

Yesterday, President Obama was refused entry into a restaurant for not wearing a tie and later fined for double parking and... ordered to return his library books... and thrown off a tram...and...

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