In a bold move announced today, the Government is setting up a board of inquiry to look into the boards of inquiry that they have already set up.
Headed by a group of very important people, some of whom have beards and wear suits, the Inquiry Inqu...
Thanks to our contacts at the new News International business "Phonetaps'R'Us", located round the back of Fairfax Bus Station, I was exclusively sent a copy of a letter, which my gum-rubbing informant claims was sent to the Chief Executive of Barclays Bank, Bob Diamond, from the Chancellor yesterday.
Dear Bob
Trusting you and yours are well.
Listen mate. Sorry the Financially Stupid Asse...
Mobile phones used to come in black. Then a few daring companies produced ruby red, navy blue and British Racing green phones. These phones will still dark.
Then came the iPhone, and it dared to be different.
It was available in WHITE. Not just...
In a shock discovery made by an undercover reporter from the 'Daily Muckspreader', it has been revealed that one of the UK's leading life insurance providers have been fleecing their customers.
The Athieva Life Insurance company stands accused of...
Master criminal and Isle of Wight's most wanted man, Curly O'Halloran evaded police yet again, after a four hour siege in a barn on the outskirts of Shanklin.
The wily thief had recently robbed a bakery van and fled to the secluded barn, with the...
Planned cuts in the police department may not be popular with many, but one section of society who are elated with the news are thieves. LancsNews's talented and outrageous reporter Taribo West tracked a robber and found him in his secret cave.
Th...
Justin Thyme, founder and lead singer of the rap band "Beetroot To Me" is in deep water with J.K.Rowling after the release of his latest song "Rake N' Vac" from his album "Plagiarhythm". Rowling's followers of course do not believe in plagiarism but...
Police in the U.K. have warned of a bizarre scam, obviously created by someone with a sweet tooth!
This unusual scam involves the scammers, (aka thieves), approaching people and kindly letting them know they have chocolate on their backs, how the...
Yesterday, an incident happened to me at a local warehouse store. That incident enraged me and had me shooting steam out of my ears and spitting fire.
While there is some humour in this article, let me say that it is mostly editorial. I take full responsibility for the words here, because they are mine. This publication/on line magazine recognizes that and is not responsible for my feeling t...
A female thief known as Fatima the Thief who is apparently responsible for hundreds of robberies in the North of England seems to keep getting away with her crimes because she wears a Burka. She allegedly attacked a 92 year old man in Newcastle and s...
Magistrates at Uttercrap Magistrates Court were taken aback today when a defendant accused of theft claimed that the pop singing curiosity Lady Gaga had put him up to it.
Nick Pantz, of Nickton Court in the town, accused of stealing ladies panties...
In a shock discovery, Susan Boyle returned home to find a man in her house.
The Scottish tree pig had been recording a song for the 'Stop Haiti Shaking' fund, when she returned to her council house in West Lothian.
As she opened the front door...
The American controlled puppet government in Iraq has sentenced a former Saddam Hussein henchman to death by hanging.
Ali Hassan Al-Majid better known as Chemical Ali who was Iraq's former defence secretary is reported to have been behind chemic...
According to recent reports, Ms Kirkbride is concerned that criticism of her use of the MPs' expenses system might deter crooks from standing for Parliament. She is understood to be concerned that thieves that are currently working in the private se...
One of Nigeria's biggest daily newspapers reported that police implicated a goat in an attempted automobile theft. In a front-page article on Friday, the Vanguard newspaper said that two men tried to steal a Mazda car two days earlier in Kwara State,...
A hapless teenage burglar found hanging upside down by his bootlaces from a window of the house he had broken into has been jailed for life in an attempt to protect him, and the public at large, from his own stupidity.
Sammy 'Asbo' Snitgruber, 16...
Gardeners at Smegmadale's Sunnysideup Allotments have been ordered by the local authorities to remove the barbed wire capping fences around their respective lots due a teenage vegetable thief filing a personal injury claim against the district counci...
In what some may think was a strange turn of events, a thief who used to rob branches of the Bradford and Bingley Building Society prior to the credit crunch turned the act of robbery on its head today.
Well known, disrespected, unemployed yet ref...