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Ground Breaking DefeatWASHINGTON: A motion making it illegal to misinform the American public on all matters pertaining to their welfare and democratic right was unanimously defeated yesterday by 530 votes to 5.
Jim 'Common' Sense Barred from GOP Convention FloorState Congressman Common Sense from Idaho was denied entry to join fellow delegates and told, "There isn't any common sense scheduled to be here" by party officials. He was told to try again in 2020.
Melania Says Speech Was A 'Cover Version ' of Michelle'sMelania Trump denied that she had plagiarized Michelle Obama '08 speech but was doing a cover version. "I think the public will remember my interpretation much,much longer. I mean really,look at me."
Michelle Obama Loved Melania's Convention Speech"Well written and memorable," stated Mrs. Obama. "I couldn't have said it better myself!"
Alphabet Pasta Now Available in ChinaThanks to 3-D printing technology, the Chinese are now able to produce noodles resembling every character in their writing system. Collect all four hundred cans!
TrumpThe sound shit makes when it hits the fan.
Coincidence or conspiracy?The oceans are running out of fish. That's OK. Trader Joe's is running out of tartar sauce.
In the Navy!The Pentagon is developing a sodium free ocean. It's called Lake Michigan
Fun in the sunThey say if you hold the ocean up to your ear you can hear yourself drowning.
Trump Rejects Offer to Speak to the NAACP"Well, I lost my black friend who I used to refer to, so what would I talk about?" admitted Trump.
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