I still have to study. I called my friend, Lady Godiva. Apparently, she was in hospital.
"Don't worry," she said over the phone. "You'll do fine in your French writing exam!" When I asked her why she thought so, she then replied. "I can read the minds of people and their thoughts of the future! I know the examiner will give your work an 'A'!"
I was shocked. How did... what the...?
BIRMINGHAM, ENG. & NEW YORK - At approximately 2pm, the Apple store in Birmingham's BullRing would be robbed.
But they would not get far.
Reports from eyewitnesses state that a youth dressed in a metallic orange outfit attacking the robber...
Female Spoof Writer, Lady G. awoke from her operation earlier today. She had her bunions removed. A year of trying to tippy-toe around some fellow Spoofers had taken its toll on her pretty feet.
She wasn't in any pain when she awoke, which she thought rather strange, considering the pain she'd felt after her boob reduction a few years earlier. Mind you, the nurse HAD forgotten to turn on the...
To clarify, my mother is not dead. My homeworld is Earth, not Gop. I was never dumped in a vat of radioactive waste, nor was I biten by a special being.
I am normal. Ish. Of course, my powers started manifesting, innocently.
Yet again, today, after being beaten up by losers for my intelligence, I found an old drawer in the street. In there was a phone.
My HTC Desire HD phone. What it was...
Ah, Masterchev, such a pleasant surprise," the voice in the darkness cooed.
"Not really. You only sent me thirty invites to come to this exact destination, then text me to make sure I'd come to the right place, and then took a picture of yourself milling around this dingy little club. By the way, couldn't you have arranged to meet at a Starbucks?" I replied, biting on a toothpick. Not because...
Sorry, you can't go back any further!
Bill Cosby Contacts Kim Kardashian to See if She Can Get Him Pardoned
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Trump Takes the U.S. Out of the U.N.
Secret Plot to Have Trump Declare War on Canada Revealed
Trump Gives North Carolina to Kim Jong Un in Return for De-Nuclearization
An original metaphor:
Roseanne Claims that Ambien Turned Her Into An Asshole
Trump Pardons Himself for All the Pussies He's Grabbed
Trump Declares War on Canada for Burning White House in War of 1812
Trump Thinks He Already Met With Kim from Korea
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