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Editor condemned to death by beheading

In the early hours of this morning the editor of this newspaper was arrested because he permitted publication in yesterday's edition a story detailing the introduction of Sharia Law into Australia. The article was deemed to be 'offensive to Islam' by...

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Australia introduces Sharia Law

The Australian Minister for Culture and Law, Ms Marjory Daw, yesterday announced that Sharia (Islamic) Law will now be part of the Australian legal system. She added, "In response to an unprecedented demand, Sharia Law will be introduced into Austral...

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Sharia law: Integration, Influence, Destruction.

A number of Western countries have been urged to integrate Sharia law (Islamic religious law) into their legal system by their Islamic residents. The idea has even found some favour amongst some of the leading and influential people, such as politici...

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Building a Snowman... the Road to Damnation

Funny story: Building a Snowman... the Road to Damnation

When snow covered Tabuk Province near Saudi Arabia's border with Jordan for the third consecutive year Sheikh Mohammed Saleh al-Munajjid sprang immediately into action: "It is not permitted to make a statue out of snow, even by way of play and fun,"...

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ISIS Is Looking For A Few Screwed-Up Men......And Women

Funny story: ISIS Is Looking For A Few Screwed-Up Men......And Women

ISIS - The Answer To The Future You've Always Wanted! (This is the real ISIS, the one that kills anyone and anything it wants, not one of those wimpy organizations with that stupid Egyptian symbol of a guy with a jackals head, the image of which, by the way, is outlawed by our sect.) Are you f___ed up? REALLY f___ed up? Do you dream of a life like the heroic characters you play for 5 h...

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ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi makes shocking confession in rogue Mosul nightclub The Burqa al-Ablah

Funny story: ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi makes shocking confession in rogue Mosul nightclub The Burqa al-Ablah

No sooner was I back in Baghdad from the journey to Mosul with Hillary than I got this strange call on my cell. I was at my favorite cheap digs, the Hotel Alzubra, ready to move back towards Syria, but it was Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi saying I should return north to Mosul. "If this is Warezabar," the voice said, "I have something. Urgent." "This is Pepe Warezabar." "Yes?" His English is...

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Bobby Lobby CEO Opposes Vibrators For Employees

Funny story: Bobby Lobby CEO Opposes Vibrators For Employees

President and CEO of Bobby Lobby, Cotton Mather, gave an exclusive interview to this magazine today. It is part of our series on the role of the corporation in U.S.society. The background for this particular interview is that the Supreme Court has ruled that the access to contraceptive coverage granted by the Affordable Care Act creates a significant burden on a corporation's free exercise of...

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Sharia-style lapidations for anyone caught fornicating at Sultan of Brunei's Beverly Hills Hotel

Funny story: Sharia-style lapidations for anyone caught fornicating at Sultan of Brunei's Beverly Hills Hotel

Los Angeles - And filthy - uh, fifty! - lashes for sneaking in rough trade into the $10,000-night Presidential Suite, especially from outside Brunei's officially-sanctioned hooker pool. The draconian punishments also apply to what Sultan Hass-Anal...

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Sharia court excommunicates Martians

Funny story: Sharia court excommunicates Martians

Abu Dhabi, UAE - An Islamic court has issued a fatwa banning Mars and Martians after someone posted 1969 footage of Mick Jagger and Marianne Faithful's favorite recreational snack on the I Luv Two-Hump Camels website. Imams sitting in the General...

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America Prevails Again

A local Islamic man who recently arrived from Islam came to America carrying big dreams of spreading Sharia Law to all the four corners of the circular Earth. Upon arriving in America, he immediately set about destroying such principles as religi...

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New App tells Saudi husbands when wife has legged it abroad

Funny story: New App tells Saudi husbands when wife has legged it abroad

Riyadh - "At last, a Sharia-compliant phone App that tells me when the coast is clear!" is how one twenty-something young Saudi male put it today as the government announced its latest electronic tagging system for wives. The new device alerts Sa...

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Applauding banned by parliament

Funny story: Applauding banned by parliament

After a series of shock accidents parliament is to impose a blanket ban on applause across England and Wales. Applause will still be allowed in Scotland whilst ministers there debate the health and safety of this dangerous activity. "Hospital A&am...

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Academic Baffled by Newt Gingrich's Fear of Sharia Law

Funny story: Academic Baffled by Newt Gingrich's Fear of Sharia Law

In his keynote address to the Tenth Annual Conference on Fear in America, noted scholar Dr. O .D. Ebby discussed an emerging fear of Sharia, or Muslim religious law, led by Newt Gingrich. "I frankly don't think Mr. Gingrich's fear is at all rati...

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'Randy Andy' Gray Moves On: Signs $3.5m Deal with Al-Jazeera to Cover World Cup!

Funny story: 'Randy Andy' Gray Moves On: Signs $3.5m Deal with Al-Jazeera to Cover World Cup!

A smug Andy Gray, fired from Sky News and deprived of his lucrative salary, wasted no time in moving his career forward as he signed a new deal with Al-Jazerra after the Qatar based media company inked its own deal with FIFA to cover the 2018 & 2...

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Iran Hangs Soccer WAG; Event Sends Tremors Through London Night Clubs!

Funny story: Iran Hangs Soccer WAG; Event Sends Tremors Through London Night Clubs!

The announcement today from Iran that they had publicly hung a soccer wag, the mistress of a former soccer star, has sent a tremor of terror and trepidation though the sports world, especially in the UK where the practice of being a 'temp' has beco...

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Saudi Arabia has an innovative way to keep law and order

Funny story: Saudi Arabia has an innovative way to keep law and order

AL-AWWAMIYA, Saudi Arabia - A teenage girl was attacked by a stray camel and after reporting the incident to the police she was arrested and punished by a judge --- she was sentenced to over 90 lashes while the camel was chased off to chew cud in th...

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A Child's Guide To Sharia Law

Funny story: A Child's Guide To Sharia Law

Yet again proving that Britain is a shining example of the success of multiculturalism, details have emerged of a network of weekend schools which teach Sharia Law to children as young as six years old. The schools, which run the length and breadt...

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Wolverhampton County Council adopts Sharia Law

Funny story: Wolverhampton County Council adopts Sharia Law

In a shock statement today, Wolverhampton County Council have announced that they are to adopt Sharia Law principles in their day to day administration of council business. The Council statement, presented today by local Muslim councillor, Ahmed...

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Breaking news…

Referendum To Ban And Remove Trump

Gosh, since Ireland was successful with their referendum to remove the ban on abortion, can the U.S. have a referendum to ban and remove Trump?
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