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Funny satire stories about Sepp Blatter

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Funny story: Aliens in World Cup Probe

Aliens in World Cup Probe

Aliens from the distant planet of Tharg have officially protested to FIFA that they were not invited to the 2014 football World Cup currently taking place in Brazil. A spokesman for the green-skinned race of decapods said, "We were very sad not to...
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Funny story: FIFA Conquers Brazil, Establishes Autocratic "FIFdom"

FIFA Conquers Brazil, Establishes Autocratic "FIFdom"

BRASILIA, BRAZIL - According to recent reports, the Fédération Internationale de Football Association (FIFA) has taken control of key cities in Brazil, toppled the Brazilian government, and changed the name of the South American country to "Goooo...
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Funny story: Blatter Boost for Women's Football

Blatter Boost for Women's Football

He was elected the president of the World Society of Friends of Suspenders in the 1970s. He incurred criticism from female footballers in 2004 when he suggested that women should "wear tighter shorts and low cut shirts to create a more female aesthe...
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Funny story: Goal Line Technology (GLT) Wouldn't Have Made Any Difference In England v. Ukraine Game

Goal Line Technology (GLT) Wouldn't Have Made Any Difference In England v. Ukraine Game

Goal Line Technology, with which it can be instantly determined whether or not a football has crossed the goal-line, would not have had any overall benefit had it been used in the England v. Ukraine game on Tuesday, I claim. The spectre of GLT rai...
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Funny story: FIFA Boss Blatter Demands Goal Line Technology After England Win

FIFA Boss Blatter Demands Goal Line Technology After England Win

Head of world football, Sepp Blatter, has finally accepted that the time is right to introduce goal-line technology (GLT) into the game following England's progress into the Euro 2012 quarter-finals last night. The FIFA president tweeted that he f...
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Funny story: FIFA want to introduce politically correct chants

FIFA want to introduce politically correct chants

Keen to show he is as Politically Correct as the head of any other organisation, FIFA President, Sepp Blatter, has asked that supporters associations for football clubs across the UK to adopt politically correct chants. "We wish to cut out the swe...
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Funny story: Racism? Football? You're Having a Laugh!

Racism? Football? You're Having a Laugh!

At a press conference celebrating the impact of pay per view viewing on football Sepp Blatter sensationally claimed today that there was no such thing as racism in football and he had no idea what the "dark skinned races" were complaining about.
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Funny story: German Speaking Sepp Blatter Backs Down Over Poppy Ruckus

German Speaking Sepp Blatter Backs Down Over Poppy Ruckus

Sepp Blatter, the German speaking head of FIFA, originally stated that the England National football team could not wear poppies on their football kits during their international match on Saturday. "This has nothing to do with Germany losing the w...
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Funny story: No Puppies says Blatter

No Puppies says Blatter

Fifa President and self appointed ruler of football Slap (me on the head) Blatter won't back down in the poppy scandal. The man who should be at home smoking a pipe and wearing slippers won't listen to anyone on the matter. "You want to wear lit...
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Funny story: NFL Set To Investigate Reports of Romo's Testosterone Shots Prior to Game Time!

NFL Set To Investigate Reports of Romo's Testosterone Shots Prior to Game Time!

Dallas Cowboy's Q-Back (no pun intended) is said to be a target of an investigation of the NFL's Drug Police after it was revealed that the effeminate, fumble fingered signal caller had resorted to several shots of testosterone prior to Sunday's ga...
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Funny story: Sepp Blatter announces special events to be added to 2012 olympics

Sepp Blatter announces special events to be added to 2012 olympics

Having come to an arrangement with the International Olympic Committee over a suitable allocation of free tickets and heavily-subsidised (if not completely free) hotels as part of his new term of dictatorship over FIFA, Sad Bladder has announced some...
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Funny story: Capello tips Bent to batter bent Blatter

Capello tips Bent to batter bent Blatter

England manager Fabio Capello has ordered his players to let Switzerland "have some" in the Euro 2012 qualifier. Switzerland is famous for having spawned Sepp Blatter and for making cheese with holes in it. Capello is tipping in form striker Da...
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Funny story: Sepp Blatter Announces New FIFA Sponsors

Sepp Blatter Announces New FIFA Sponsors

In the wake of the news that Adidas and Coca Cola are seriously reviewing their future business dealings with FIFA, the world football association's newly re-elected president Sepp Blatter has got his retaliation in first by announcing a new set of s...
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Funny story: FIFA presidential election result a close run for Sad Bladder

FIFA presidential election result a close run for Sad Bladder

The re-election of Sad Bladder as president of international football orgainsation FIFA for a 17th term was a close run for the 92 year-old former Austrian welly-throwing champion. Despite being the only candidate in the election, which was scruti...
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Funny story: Cheryl Cole And Imogen Thomas Found In Icelandic Volcano - Eating Cucumber With Sepp Blatter

Cheryl Cole And Imogen Thomas Found In Icelandic Volcano - Eating Cucumber With Sepp Blatter

According to the gossip columns, the trio were found sitting in the crater of extinct Icelandic volcano, Imblofyer, eating cucumber and talking about ticket allocations for the 2012 Olympic Games, by part time explorer, Sir Kenneth Tarby-Dodds. Ta...
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Funny story: Sepp Blatter's Dodgy Dealings Revealed

Sepp Blatter's Dodgy Dealings Revealed

Sepp Blatter's Dodgy past has tonight been sensationally revealed after 6 decades of absolute secrecy. The secrecy was necessary because Sepp believed that if the truth about his secret past was revealed, it would undermine his reputation in the wor...
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Funny story: Sepp Blatter Tightens Grip On FIFA

Sepp Blatter Tightens Grip On FIFA

Reigning President Sepp Blatter was re-elected unopposed to the post and the 75 year old Swiss lost no time in tightening his grip on the association. The 4th termer, who has been under severe pressure in recent weeks due to claims of bribery and...
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Funny story: The late Osama Bin Laden in running for FIFA presidency

The late Osama Bin Laden in running for FIFA presidency

Just when Sepp Blatter thought it was safe to deposit slush-hush money in his Swiss bank account, a late, second candidate has blown in and declared himself for the controversial presidency of international football association FIFA. The late Osam...
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