London - 'Kazy Karta' chipolatas made from surplus Kazakh thoroughbreds will be beefing up the country's shot put team's Olympic chances according to an announcement today.
The Astana delicacy has an awesome reputation among the nation's gastropod...
In an attempt to increase the vote in the up-coming UK local elections, sausages have been allowed to take part. It is the first time any meat products have been eligible to vote since pork faggots were stripped of the right in 1827. Other European c...
Local man Martin Shuttlecock, in an uncharacteristic fit of adventurousness, travelled to the posher suburbs of London, somewhere near, or even in Kent, apparently for a family double-Christening.
The ceremony itself passed off without major incid...
Mad Rocker Pete Doherty has been arrested after breaking into a record shop in the Bavarian town of Regensburg in Germany.
The former Libertines & Babyshambles frontman was caught stealing a bundle of records and also a guitar. An eye-witness...
Security screeners at LAX noticed something amiss when foodie Nigella Lawson came through their security line readying herself for a trip back home to London after spending a whirlwind couple of weeks in America.
After noticing Ms. Lawson acting a...
The Ryde Development Corporation, chaired by gay Mayor Vernon Adcock - resplendent in the traditional Mayoral ermine robes and crocodile-skin boots, with stovepipe hat and clutching a traditional Cumberland sausage, shallow fried - today granted tent...
That is the question that was on everyone's mind when the story broke on the Spoof by writer Bureau that Adam Lambert will be replacing the late Jimmy Dean as a spokesperson for the popular sausage brand.
"When we approached Adam for the gig," say...
Good-bye, Jimmy Dean
Though I hardly knew you at all
You really knew how to grind the pork
And spice it up just right...
So there I was, this morning, riding the bus home from work, and I'm thinking I might make eggs and toast for breakfast when I get home. And I think, hey, some turkey sausage would be good with the eggs and toast.
(Turkey sausage because even though I wrote "pork" in...
A cleaner came close to being the latest taste sensation in the sausage world. The guy narrowly avoided being minced into sausage after a mishap in the United States, after he was sucked into a machine at his employers sausage-making company.
The...
Braut City, New Hampshire. Last night an unnamed worker at the Live Free or Die Sausage Company was grabbed and loaded into a sausage machine by an industrial robot. The man emerged minutes later as a six-foot long sausage.
The man was able t...
Sausage eaters all over the world eating them and other processed foods are in danger, they kill!
German sausage eaters would normally be "high risk" because they eat, per man, the most sausages on the planet but being Krauts they have a solution...
Disgraced cosmetic surgeon Jaffari Al Jiggyjig faced a second day of questioning by the Greedy Medical Council over allegations that he ruined a patient's sex life when he allegedly botched a penis enhancement procedure on a man known as 'Patient X'...
Global sausage manufacturer 'Balls Sausages' lost their battle with the TV regulator today regarding complaints raised about an advert shown in July.
35 people complained about the advert which depicted a normal family of four sitting down to dinn...
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - A prize pig nearly got poked by a fat fucker at a farm just Northwest of San Francisco earlier today, but a dry Italian salami put an end to that, according to a witness.
Robert "Bob" Kuleto, already shaped like an enormous Sec...
What was supposed to be a routine cooking item on gardening ace Alan Titchmarsh's UK afternoon magazine show descended into the realms of farce today as Afro-Caribbean-Brummie madcap cook Rusty Lee attempted to make home made sausages.
For Caribbe...
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Even as the World Health Organization struggles to contain a recent outbreak of swine flu, a startling number of other swine related diseases and illnesses have begun to crop up across the globe.
"This latest development is esp...
Basra, Iraq. Yesterday - As British forces withdrew from this southern Iraq city, they were replaced by US Army personnel, who immediately complained about the food on offer at the British base.
Upon being presented with a Full English Breakfast,...
Zimbabwean big game hunter and store proprietor Clayton Le Moors today came under fire from hordes of frustrated potential customers after promising to supply sausages with outstandingly high fresh meat content as served in the south of Africa to Eur...