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Funny story:  Sperm Whale Spotted In Lake Erie

Sperm Whale Spotted In Lake Erie

CLEVELAND - In an astounding sighting, several people sailing on Lake Erie have reported seeing a sperm whale in the freshwater lake. One of the individuals, Wexford Spillovich, 48, said that he and his brand new bride Kylee Tina, 43, were sailing...
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Funny story:  Cruise Lines Agree on Regulatory Body

Cruise Lines Agree on Regulatory Body

CEO's of the worlds cruise lines announced their cooperation with a newly empowered regulatory agency. "Maritime law and international waters have made a regulatory agency nearly impossible to form. That is why the top cruise lines have agreed to...
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Funny story:  The Longest Night (Skoobs writing comp)

The Longest Night (Skoobs writing comp)

On the 11th of November, 1911, a passenger ship, the S.S. Titnatic set sail for the Isle of Wight. It would not reach its destination. This is the story of that night. 16:00HRS: Petty officer Spike Huff shouted orders for the Stevedores to undo the hawsers and let go. The lead Stevedore did let go, choking his workmates and making them retch with the pungent smell. Tugs rallied alongside...
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Funny story:  Huge fans will be used to rid the Olympics of pollution

Huge fans will be used to rid the Olympics of pollution

With the sun finally coming out for the final few days of the Olympics, a new problem has emerged, with pollution set to make breathing dangerous for athletes. "Ozone levels are so high," said Boris Johnson, Mayor of London, who has decided to rem...
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Funny story:  President Obama Orders a Hooker

President Obama Orders a Hooker

Immediately following a lengthy meeting in the Oval Office with the Director of the U.S. Secret Service Mark J. Sullivan, President Obama decided to order a hooker. Sources say his meeting with Sullivan lasted nearly four hours. It follows a rece...
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Funny story:  Whales mimic stricken vessel

Whales mimic stricken vessel

In an unusual display of solidarity for it's stricken protectors, a small gam of whales have formed a protective circle around the a stricken Sea Shepherd Conservation Society (SSCS) vessel. The MV Brigitte Bardot was hit by a rogue wave in the Sout...
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Funny story:  Shylock Humes And The Narwhal's Tusk Scrimshaw, Part Two

Shylock Humes And The Narwhal's Tusk Scrimshaw, Part Two

The man who stood in our doorway was breathing heavily. A swarthy, weathered leathery face with a cudgeled nose peered out from beneath a forward-tilted ancient green billycock hat and from between luxuriant long side-whiskers of the sort formerly termed Piccadilly weepers. The dark visage was screwed up as if it faced an Atlantic storm, rather than our humble sitting-room. A shiny, blue serge dou...
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Funny story:  British Shipping Danger as Lighthouse Subsidy Is Cut

British Shipping Danger as Lighthouse Subsidy Is Cut

British ships faces being left in the dark when they approach hazardous Irish waters, it is feared. As a result cost-cutting exercises, the UK Government is reducing payments to the Commissioners of Irish Lights (CIL). The annual subsidy has been...
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Funny story:  Lady Godiva Sails Round Hyde Park Serpentine Single Handed

Lady Godiva Sails Round Hyde Park Serpentine Single Handed

Friends, family and a bloke from Middlesborough, celebrated the return of Booker Prize Winning writer Lady Godiva. As her peddalo arrived at the key side in Hyde Park, a very tired Lady Godiva said she was glad to be back on dry land. From a h...
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Funny story:  16-Year Old Female American Sailor Rescued

16-Year Old Female American Sailor Rescued

Failing in her attempt to sail around the world, sixteen year old Abby Sunderland was rescued by a ready, willing and able group of young Somali Pirates who had managed to sail several thousand miles out of their own jurisdiction just for the privile...
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Funny story:  Yo Ho Ho, Get Off My Ass!

Yo Ho Ho, Get Off My Ass!

THOUSAND OAKS, CA - Teen mariner Abby Sunderland, whose attempt to become the youngest person to sail around the world was thwarted when her craft's mast broke in heavy seas in the Indian Ocean, has been rescued from her parents and is being held in...
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Funny story:  Recreating Capt Bligh's 'Bounty' voyage - Brit mutineers

Recreating Capt Bligh's 'Bounty' voyage - Brit mutineers

A group of men attempting to recreate the epic 7,000 km (4,350 mile) voyage of Captain William Bligh have had an embarrassing setback, one of their crew has mutinied! The would be mutineer, 18-year-old Brit Christopher 'Ginger' Wilde, disappeared...
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Funny story:  Jamaican Fleet Sails to UK to Rescue Stranded Air Passengers

Jamaican Fleet Sails to UK to Rescue Stranded Air Passengers

Due to one rather untimely volcanic eruption in Iceland, and with what may now also be an extended grounding for air travel into and out of the UK, those wishing to travel where neither tires nor trains go, has become just a little problematic. B...
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Funny story:  Dutch girl's solo voyage banned for being too boring

Dutch girl's solo voyage banned for being too boring

A Dutch court has stopped a 14-year old girl from sailing round the world, because 'sailing round the world is the most boring thing to get in the news, year after year, it's a totally uninteresting thing to do.' 'What next? The first dyslexic pot...
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Funny story:  Paddle manufacturer closes Shit Creek Plant stranding billions

Paddle manufacturer closes Shit Creek Plant stranding billions

Today, residents of Shit Creek were dismayed to discover that the areas last, and only employer is about to go into 'liquidation'. The 'Paddle Manufacturers' were forced into closure by a combination of cash flow problems and paradoxically, a hug...
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Funny story:  Drunken Sailors To Protest Against Their Removal From Nursery Rhyme

Drunken Sailors To Protest Against Their Removal From Nursery Rhyme

A mass demonstration by Drunken Sailors has been planned after key lyrics were removed from a nursery rhyme by a government-funded books project, after they were deemed "offensive". The Bookstart charity claims the words "Drunken Sailor", and the...
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Funny story:  Pedalophile Ring Smashed

Pedalophile Ring Smashed

Interpol has announced that following "unprecedented" international co-operation, a "particularly slimey" pedalophile ring has been broken up. "We have been closely in the wake of these despicable pedo's" said a buoyant Capt Pugwash of D.R.I.B.B.L...
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Funny story:  Ben Ainslie Asks British Expats For Farts To Create Wind For Crucial Race

Ben Ainslie Asks British Expats For Farts To Create Wind For Crucial Race

Ben Ainslie, the British sailor, has put out a request for Beijing-based British expatriates to come down to the Olympic sailing event today, and provide wind for his crucial last race, by farting en masse. The strange request comes after Saturday...
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True Facts From Snoops #1345

When alarmed, Oprah Winfrey can swell up to five times her normal size. She was taught this by Dr. Oz.

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