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Man declared dead wakes up in morgue body bagA bloody miracle, says the mortician, considering I was about to inject him with two gallons of formaldehyde
Ellen challenges HillaryHollywood lesbian Ellen Degenerate issued an ice bucket challenge to "friend" Hillary Clinton. "She's too cheap to donate money," Ellen said, "and she has hot hooters. I bet she has nice pokies!"
Brosnan still hot 15 years after being voted 'sexiest man aliveAccording to poll of 5,000 senior citizens the actor still the nation's top heart throb among 70 to 85 year old women
Test results back on ultra-rare blue lobster caught off Maine CoastDarned critter must have swallowed a helluva lot of Viagra to turn that shade
Man has moth removed from rear where it buzzed for two weeksGuess he must have been trying to sit the problem out before letting the docs in
Wife of Scientology founder 'left $2.5M house to dog'The Rev Rex Kennels said to be pleased as punch
DEA Tightens Rule on Widely Prescribed PainkillerBarmen no longer allowed to prescribe Kentucky bourbon to pain-in-the-ass customers
Scientists say geckos rely on feet hairs and not insuranceYep, Obama's Affordable Care act a total waste of time for geckos
Pacific octopus hold egg-brooding recordHopefully it can now be transferred to a CD after digitising process completed
Colorado Medical Marijuana Business Facing Federal HurdlesWhole State is too damned stoned to get it together to do stuff, man
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