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Funny story:  Book Review - Henry V by William Shakespeare

Book Review - Henry V by William Shakespeare

Just who is the secretive Henry V...what does the V stand for? Viktor, Vaughn, Vincent or even Vanessa? No, seriously, I know that V means 5 in French or some other 'silly' language. So, my real question about this book is...what happened to parts 1,2,3 and 4 of this series....and will there be a sixth installment? I wish writers would not start a series of books with the fifth one....s...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Noah's Ark by God

Book Review - Noah's Ark by God

This book bears no resemblance to the movie starring Australian actor Russell Crowe! That said, I would be interested if Crowe, in his role as Noah, wanted to make room on his Ark for kangaroos, wallabies and Koala bears; as I saw none board the ark in the movie. As an Australian he should really have insisted. Also, and this is just an observation, did he get a massive discount at Petsm...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Fifty Shades of Grey by E L James

Book Review - Fifty Shades of Grey by E L James

This is a book I simply could not put down, due entirely to the fact that I was involved in a rather unfortunate sexual bondage role play game involving 234 rolls of sticky tape. And a goat. However, once I managed to remove the goat from my apartment I did read the book. There are many words I could use to describe this book, fantastic, great, superb, remarkable, outstanding, stupendous...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Peter Pan by Some Bloke Called Barry

Book Review - Peter Pan by Some Bloke Called Barry

This book "Hooked" me from page one, one of the only bright memories of a sad childhood plagued by bouts of bed wetting, temper tantrums and soiled underwear......I really wish Grandma hadn't moved in with us.... I digress. Peter pan is a kid that never grow up, a bit like Arnold from Different Strokes. However, instead of being adopted by a rich white guy, Peter Pan embarks on a horrendo...
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Funny story:  Book Review - The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas

Book Review - The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas

One of my favorite books. Once I realized it was not a non-fiction book about a census study on a small French Island or a Sesame Street character with a fetish for numbers and in fact a tale of revenge, hidden identities and twists I was pleasantly surprised. If in fact anyone did compile a census of Monte Cristo, and did indeed count the residents of the small island, I am led to believe t...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne

Book Review - Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne

This book was a little too deep for my liking. As a shallow sort of guy I was a little out of my depth. As I read it my heart sank as I plunged into a depression. I do not like to whale, and I am not fishing for compliments, but this was oceans worse than my book, Seven Leagues Under the Sea. Anyway, I hope that in the years to come Miss Verne writes other books, she is a talented write...
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Funny story:  Book Review - The List by Steve Martini

Book Review - The List by Steve Martini

A Twat is a MASSIVE fan of Steve Martin. He loved him in Parenthood and Parenthood 3 (not so hot on Parenthood 2) and he is utterly hilariously as that guy with the big nose. A TWAT DID NOT KNOW HE WROTE BOOKS! Wow! What a talented guy, despite his big nose. What the list is, A Twat does not know, by A Twat, who is continuing to write in third person, also could write a book about lists...
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Funny story:  Book Review - The Postman Always Rings Twice by James M Cain

Book Review - The Postman Always Rings Twice by James M Cain

A Twat wishes his postman would ring once! Many a time A Twat have missed letters and packages because he is too LAZY to ring the doorbell...and he hates A Twat's pack of rottweilers that A Twat allows to roam around in A Twat's yard. A Twat suggests that A Twat's postman read this book and consider ringing at least once in future! A Twat liked this book and A Twat has today decided to refer...
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Funny story:  Book Review - The Runaway Jury by John Grisham

Book Review - The Runaway Jury by John Grisham

Based on the movie me thinks, of the same name, starring John Cusack, Rachel Weisz and Gene Hackman, directed by Gary Fleder. This isn't the first time Grisham has stolen ideas from movies, then passed them off as 'original novels'. The Firm, The Client, A Time to Killer, all ripped from the big screen. Is it me? Has no one else noticed? I think it is now high time that Grisham focus...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Abraham Lincoln by Carl Sandburg

Book Review - Abraham Lincoln by Carl Sandburg

I enjoyed it, I am a big fan of any book about Lincoln, but, unfortunately like many biographies about this man NO mention of his vampire hunting youth. If you can get over that then you will enjoy. The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir I thought this was a self help book, as I suffer from one second sex, premature ejaculation, for want of a better phrase. Unfortunately it wasn't, so the p...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Death of a Transvestite by Ed Wood

Book Review - Death of a Transvestite by Ed Wood

"Hero/heroine Glen Marker sits on Death Row and offers to tell his life story in all its sordid detail in exchange for his last wish: to die in drag! I understand that Saddam Hussein and Colonel Gaddafi made the same request but it was refused. The Fry Chronicles by Stephen Fry This is NOT a cookbook on how to do eggs, french fries or any other food that involves hot oil. After I read i...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Happy Days by Samuel Beckett

Book Review - Happy Days by Samuel Beckett

Utter drivel! A complaint waste of time and money. No mention of Fonzie, No Ralph Malph, No Richie, No Arnold's and not even a whiff of Mr C or Mrs C. Sorry, and I make NO apologies,to write a book about Happy Days and not include some of the main characters is, quite frankly, idiotic. Samuel Beckett, sir, I beg you rewrite this nonsense and include the aforementioned characters. You...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Moby Dick by Herman Melville

Book Review - Moby Dick by Herman Melville

Not a biography about an extremely annoying pop star who just moans through his songs, well known for his sample-based electronic music, vegan lifestyle, and support of animal rights...and looks like a bald nerd. No. It is about a big whale. I guess it was my fault, for not reading the title of the book correctly. I thought it was "Moby is a Dick", which of course he is. Anyway, I re...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Orlando by Virginia Wolfe

Book Review - Orlando by Virginia Wolfe

I was SO disappointed by this book. No mention of Disney. No mention of Sea World. No mention of Wet and Wild. Not a whisper about Universal Studios. Not one hotel recommendation, map or one tip on where to eat. No clue as to where one could purchase womens clothing that could, say, possibly, fit a man. No directions to clubs and nightspots that welcomed secret transvestites. What...
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Funny story:  Book Review - St Elmo by Augusta Jane Evans

Book Review - St Elmo by Augusta Jane Evans

Wow! First of all, when did they make Elmo a saint? Not that he doesn't deserve it. Let's face it, kids love him, grown ups love him, and it appears now that the Pope loves him! All that work he does, helping kids read, teaching them to eat healthier, and bringing joy to millions. Oscar the Grouch, Big Bird, Count von Count, Prairie Dawn, Grover, and Cookie Monster can only pray th...
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Funny story:  Book Review - The Elton John Story by Mark Bego

Book Review - The Elton John Story by Mark Bego

The Elton John Story by Mark Bego Okay, I loved this book, I am a big fan of Elton John, fascinating and all that - but it doesn't say if he is gay in real life or just when he is on stage or recording etc. I wish I knew the answer. Idi Amin by Steve Dougherty Brilliant in The Butler, fantastic in The Crying Game, loved him in The Shield and great in Good Morning Vietnam - this man des...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Whose Body? by Dorothy Sayers

Book Review - Whose Body? by Dorothy Sayers

Whose Body? Just gave me a great idea for a reality/celebrity/quiz show! I truly believe it would be a massive hit! Every week, six celebrities are asked to pose nude with a paper bag on their heads.....and then 3 contestants have to guess who they are! The ratings would be amazing. I would suggest that Rosie O'Donnell, Oprah Winfrey, Ricky Gervais, Kirstie Alley and Seth Rogan and J...
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Funny story:  Book Review - Quite Ugly One Morning by Christopher Brookmyre

Book Review - Quite Ugly One Morning by Christopher Brookmyre

The title of this book hits the nail right on the head. I have lost count of the times I have gone to bed drunk with a beautiful woman only to wake up, hungover and shocked to find that the pretty woman I went to bed with the night before has been replaced by what I can only say is usually a horrendous female version of my Uncle David...but unlike David they have facial hair. As for the boo...
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