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Funny story: Scotland invaded by hoards of English refugees seeking asylum!

Scotland invaded by hoards of English refugees seeking asylum!

Scottish border authorities are being overrun by English refugees hoping to escape the "madness"! Nicola Sturgeon has ordered Scottish bricklayers, dressed in kilts of course, to rebuild Hadrian's Wall, hoping the "wind will blow high, laddie" so...
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Funny story: Real-life plane hijack in Malta to be filmed!

Real-life plane hijack in Malta to be filmed!

A real life hijack in Malta is to be filmed because it's cheaper than the one that was actually being filmed! As soon as the film crew realised there was a real hijacking taking place, they fired the actors without pay and purchased the rights to...
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Funny story: Tories to accept refugees if they "went to a good school"

Tories to accept refugees if they "went to a good school"

The UK Prime Minister David Cameron has said that he will agree to accept 3,000 young refugees into the country, but only on the condition that they are "not oiks". In a speech to the Conservative party he said that it was always regrettable when...
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Funny story: Petticoats and Davy Lamps

Petticoats and Davy Lamps

Following the discriminatory wristband scandal in Cardiff, where refugees were required to wear coloured bands to ensure they could be identified by staff serving meals, the government has apologized unreservedly and has introduced measures which, th...
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Funny story: North Korea to Accept Ten Million Syrian Refugees

North Korea to Accept Ten Million Syrian Refugees

"Well, fuck!" said North Korean leader Kim Jong Un, "It's not like anyone else wants to come here. Yes, the double meaning --I said 'come'-- is intentional: After a typical eighty-hour work week, while subsisting on 1200 calories a day, the averag...
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Funny story: Corbyn's Plans To Turn Downing Street into Refugee Camp

Corbyn's Plans To Turn Downing Street into Refugee Camp

Jeremy Corbyn has today vowed that he would turn Downing Street into a refugee centre. Speaking from one of the spare bedrooms in his North London detached house, Corbyn said this: "We need to show compassion. We need to show the world we are pre...
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Funny story: 'Come on in' - European Leaders set an Example by taking in Refugees

'Come on in' - European Leaders set an Example by taking in Refugees

At Downing Street, Mr and Mrs Cameron have vacated two rooms in the attic to create space for a Somalian family of 13. "We all need to pull our fingers out", explained Mr Cameron enigmatically. Rooms at Buckingham Palace were not yet available, ex...
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Funny story: Germans claim most refugees arriving in Europe are Mexican - Trump implicated

Germans claim most refugees arriving in Europe are Mexican - Trump implicated

In a startling development, German authorities have discovered that 75 per cent of all refugees arriving over the lastĀ  three months are Mexicans carrying falseĀ  Syrian passports. Even more startling, links to Donald Trump have been uncovered! Sec...
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Funny story: Refugee Crisis Hits NHS Hard

Refugee Crisis Hits NHS Hard

The NHS is already buckling under a massively increased workload since the refugee crisis began. Doctors and nurses are struggling to cope as hospitals are being swamped with the influx of people affected by the current conflict in the middle east...
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Funny story: EU to Launch Social Network for Refugees

EU to Launch Social Network for Refugees

The European Union is set to launch a social network for refugees fleeing to Europe from Syria, to help migrants communicate with the country in which they wish to reside. Daily vast numbers of refugees cross European borders in the hope that a be...
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Funny story: Mankind's Suffering Redeemed by Science

Mankind's Suffering Redeemed by Science

In a recent global survey by U-R-FKD science magazine among the starving and homeless of the world it was unanimously agreed that the recent discovery of mountains on Pluto and the billions of dollars spent on it had given "meaning at last to all our...
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Funny story: Italian Navy Tows Jay Z and Beyonce's Yacht To Port For Smuggling Refugees.

Italian Navy Tows Jay Z and Beyonce's Yacht To Port For Smuggling Refugees.

Italy (the toe part) - The Italian Navy towed a gleaming white mega-yacht into port, allegedly belonging to rap mogul Jay Z and Pop Star wife Beyonce, for allegedly trying to smuggle more than fifty refugees into Europe, authorities say. But, Jay...
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Funny story: Libyan Man Selling The Crap Out of Pool Toys Down By The Docks

Libyan Man Selling The Crap Out of Pool Toys Down By The Docks

Tripoli, Libya - Amhar Sandibar never thought he'd be so lucky again. Back in the good old Khadafi years, he had a nice little business selling swimming pool supplies: floating loungers, blow-up whales and arm-swimmies, etc. to a wealthy flow of the...
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Funny story: Statue of Liberty to be replaced with new structure that looks like a New York police officer

Statue of Liberty to be replaced with new structure that looks like a New York police officer

Spearheaded by Senator John McCain, a new bipartisan movement inside the Congress is working toward tearing down and replacing the Statue of Liberty. So far no one in the government has raised any objections, with the President himself saying, "We...
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Funny story: UN: "USA refugee figure passes 150 million for first time"

UN: "USA refugee figure passes 150 million for first time"

NEW YORK, NY - UN spokesperson, Lotta Boolsheet, issued a report today stating that the number of US citizens forced to leave their homes has exceeded 150 million for the first time since Jimmy Carter was president. 60 percent the USA's refugees a...
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Funny story: Sharks with frickin' laser beams: The new border protection defensive policy of Australia

Sharks with frickin' laser beams: The new border protection defensive policy of Australia

Australian Greens Senator, Sarah Hanson-Young has recently discovered a revolutionary new defense system that could bolster Australia's border security. In the last few years, Australia has experienced an influx in asylum seekers that has divided...
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Funny story: Somerset boat people stopped by Immigration officials trying to enter U.K.

Somerset boat people stopped by Immigration officials trying to enter U.K.

A UKIP comedy party spokesperson told our reporter this morning that the party had no problem with the scores of Somerset refugees entering Britain illegally. "These people will be held at a central processing unit and dealt with according to EU rul...
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Funny story: Chopper Reid addresses the United Nations Security Council

Chopper Reid addresses the United Nations Security Council

In a last ditch effort to save her "Swap an Illegal" deal with Malaysia, Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard has appointed Chopper Reid as Australia's Ambassador to the United Nations. This morning Chopper addressed the Security Council in...
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Breaking News...

Trump Will Stop Calling Gold Star Parents and Will Just Tweet Them Instead

The message will be the same: "He knew what he was signing" & "Sorry he was an unsuccesful soldier."
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