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History's Misquotes Come to Light

Funny story: History's Misquotes Come to Light

Washington, DC In a history convention held in the nation's capitol, many facts came to light regarding some of history's most famous quotes. For instance, John Paul Jones did say "Don't Give up the Ship!" but he added the line, "Sell it Instead!" When Patrick Henry said "Give me liberty or give me death," history misplaced the part where he said, "On second thought, just give me liberty."...

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New Famous Quotes

"God Bless You is an expression addressed to a person after they sneeze. Why not after they pass wind. Both bodily functions expel air forcibly from the body usually with a loud noise. The church should accept this new application because the bible tells us God created man in his own image." Pope Francis Note: This could explain why churchgoers sit in church pews. "I support wildlife. Call m...

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Faymiss Screwd Up Kwotes In Histree

In the end it's not your life that counts. It's the file in your ears. - A. Bramm Linkend Heirs used to inaccurate da-da's are munchless, then used to no da-da at all. - Barles H. Cabbage If I decide that you're an idiot I'll be hitting you with my accordion. - Yo-Han "Say Bass-chin" Bock We are shaved by our thoughts. We come. We think. Never mind, whisper. Joey...

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Translation attained of Ann Romney's comment on tax returns: 'We've given all you people need to know'

Funny story: Translation attained of Ann Romney's comment on tax returns: 'We've given all you people need to know'

WASHINGTON - Experts were quick to point out that Ann Romney was not mincing words today when she told ABC News, "We've given all you people need to know" in terms of past income tax returns. Linguists, however, were even quicker to disagree. "...

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Parody writers fed up with Palin and Bachmann, claim these women are stealing their thunder

Funny story: Parody writers fed up with Palin and Bachmann, claim these women are stealing their thunder

It's hard to be funny when you can't take what people say, manipulate the words a bit, and then make the people sound like asses. Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann take the manipulating out of the equation. Said one out-of-work parody writer, "Y...

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Little known Political Quotes

Funny story: Little known Political Quotes

This hand picked selection of Political Quotes was gathered together by Inchcock, in the hopes of prompting a movement within the country to enable the overtaking of the Government, and its incarceration of the nepotistic, greedy, silver-spoon-in-the-mouths, members, and Her Majesties Opposition. 'The government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax i...

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Quotes From The Friends, Ex-Wives, and Enemies of Rush Limbaugh

Funny story: Quotes From The Friends, Ex-Wives, and Enemies of Rush Limbaugh

Rush Hudson Limbaugh, III, 59, has just published a follow up book to his 2009, best seller, Quotes From The Book of Limbaugh. The noted radio host, political commentator, author, television personality, and well known GOP mouthpiece loves being in the spotlight even more than he loves sucking on 10-inch cigars. Limbaugh is one of those unique national personalities who is either loved or ha...

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The State of the Onion Address: George W. Bush Quotes

Funny story: The State of the Onion Address: George W. Bush Quotes

It's funny how stuff accumulates like sediment. When I first considered posting these George W. Bush quotes, I thought, "That's sort of a cop out." I didn't think it would be much work, you see, not like writing an actual magazine article. Just a simple cut and paste job, right? Well, not exactly. I started collecting these Dubya quotes as an unpublished story well over a year ago, mainly so I...

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Shock: Fighters Fly Off The Handle.

Funny story: Shock: Fighters Fly Off The Handle.

A London born man has been detained by police indefinitely for pissing on someone's chips. Mr Walken-Cleeshay, who as every schoolboy knows is as old as Methuselah, committed the lewd act and subsequently had his collar felt, after coming to logge...

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In quotes, the Berlin Wall anniversary

Funny story: In quotes, the Berlin Wall anniversary

German Chancellor Angela Merkel: 'Today marks a happy day for our beloved Fuhrer's dream of a single-state Europe ruled from Berlin. The Reich lives on! Heil Hitler!' Former Soviet Union leader Mikhail Gorbachev: 'And we lost 10 million comrades in the War for this? To see the Germans all happy and smiling and richer than ever, while we starve once more? Pah!' US President Barack Obama: 'Sep...

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Quotes From The Book of Limbaugh

Funny story: Quotes From The Book of Limbaugh

Rush Hudson Limbaugh III, 58, has just written his first book of quotes entitled, Quotes From The Book of Limbaugh. The noted radio host, political commentator, author, television personality, and well known and loved GOP ass-kisser loves being in the spotlight, which he says he actually invented back in the 60s. The book which is published by the Sequoia Sapling Publishing Company contains...

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Breaking news…

National Park Service Rewrites Statue of Liberty Plaque

"Give me your strong, your rich, your workers yearning to breathe capitalism. Send no homeless, impoverished, or those seeking refuge from MS-13 to me. I want no trash to tarnish our golden door."
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