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Funny story: Exhumation latest! Vatican 'accepted one billion lire' bung to inter Queen Mother in RIP Pope's basilica

Exhumation latest! Vatican 'accepted one billion lire' bung to inter Queen Mother in RIP Pope's basilica

Rome - The Queen Mother's remains were secretly taken from the Transylvanian Crypt at Windsor Castle and reburied at the Vatican. The 2003 move saw her interred next to Hitler's Pope Pius XII with whom she had a son who became President George Bus...
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Funny story: New aga-saga says Queen Mother 'was a bastard' - so what else is new?

New aga-saga says Queen Mother 'was a bastard' - so what else is new?

London - A French maid toiling away at Lord Strathmore's stove has been outed as the birth mother of mad-as-a-hatter Elizabeth Bowes-Lyon who became the wife of King George VI. Marguerite Rodiere was herself the bastard spawn of the Rev Charles Ca...
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Funny story: Royals praying Queen doesn't drop dead on April Fools

Royals praying Queen doesn't drop dead on April Fools

Windsor - A service of thanksgiving for the mad old Queen Mum dropping dead 10 years ago poured cold water on predictions that Queen Elizabeth II will kick the bucket this Sunday. Apparently the psychotic centenarian's last actual words were "I'll...
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Funny story: Queen Mother Insult Ignites UK Irish Press Row

Queen Mother Insult Ignites UK Irish Press Row

The editor of one of the UK's weekly Irish community newspapers stunned readers this week by telling a correspondent, essentially, to belt up. A reader of the Irish Post, Anne Leacy, took exception to an article in the February 4 edition which ref...
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Funny story: Palace old guard denied Madonna access to definitive Duchess book

Palace old guard denied Madonna access to definitive Duchess book

Los Angeles - A Hollywood source claimed today Madonna was deliberately thwarted 'on copyright grounds' from having so much as a sneak peek at historical archives about the Duchess. "Someone in Windsor Castle is still pretty freaked out," royal co...
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Funny story: Necromancer Aleister Crowley and Queen Mother behind six mysterious Tutankhamun deaths

Necromancer Aleister Crowley and Queen Mother behind six mysterious Tutankhamun deaths

The reviled satanist and his favourite muse are top suspects in the unexplained London deaths of six men connected to the 1923 opening of the pharaoh's burial chamber in Luxor by Howard Carter. New research published this week details how a total...
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Funny story: Royal Undies Rifled During Funeral

Royal Undies Rifled During Funeral

London, UK: Following weeks of shocking revelations regarding phone hacking and illegal payments to police officers, it has now emerged that a News of the World "journalist" broke into Buckingham Palace during the Queen Mother's funeral in 2002, and...
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Funny story: Prince Philip confesses to Prince Charles that he is really going to miss reading the News of the World

Prince Philip confesses to Prince Charles that he is really going to miss reading the News of the World

Prince Philip is obviously upset at the demise of his beloved News of the World newspaper. He confessed, this morning, to Prince Charles that he is indeed going to miss reading the paper. He reminisced with Charles about the 'good old days' of Th...
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Funny story: KGB hitwoman's gofer carjacked

KGB hitwoman's gofer carjacked

London - (Karmic Mess): A man described as a former equerry to lardarse impostor the Queen Mother has had a spot of bother. Forty nine year-old Niall Hall was carjacked, stripped naked, robbed and abused by thugs who then cleaned out his bank acco...
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Funny story: Helena Bonham Carter Declares War on Helen Mirren

Helena Bonham Carter Declares War on Helen Mirren

Buried under accolades for her role in the King's Speech, the actress Helena Bonham Carter has now put the actress Helen Mirren on notice that her days are over as reigning queen of actresses portraying reigning queens. "Going forward, I deserve...
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Funny story: Queen Mother's car pelted with flowers

Queen Mother's car pelted with flowers

Queen Catherine the Queen Mother was being driven through the centre of London in her maroon ninety year old high top Rolls Royce yesterday, when she was spotted by pedestrians walking past street vendors selling flowers. They mobbed the car forc...
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Funny story: 97 UK descendants of clone cow

97 UK descendants of clone cow

London - (Reuterus & Mad Cow Disease Mess): A one-woman walking crime wave is how every security/intelligence agency around the world has dubbed her. "And now the putrid meat of her bloody relatives has totally contaminated the food chain!" d...
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Funny story: Kray Twins were Queen Mother's sons say patio corpse cops

Kray Twins were Queen Mother's sons say patio corpse cops

London - (Concrete Patio Mess): In their misspent youth they made Venables and Thompson seem like the angelic host. And for fifty years their reign of terror kept the fetid Queen Mother impersonator Viole(n)t Freeman sitting pretty in grace and fa...
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Funny story: British Royals in discrete public showings

British Royals in discrete public showings

Theatre goers were astonished last night as the lights went down at the start of the play War Horse in London's West End, when who should arrive late, shuffling to their seats but Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip on an incognito night out. Having...
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Funny story: Statue Of Queen Mother Revealed By British Royal Family

Statue Of Queen Mother Revealed By British Royal Family

In London today, Queen Elizabeth II has unveiled a new statue honoring her late mother, affectionately known as the Queen Mum or the Queen's Mumsey or Crazy Old Bat, according to whom you were asking and how sober he was at the time. Of course, if...
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Funny story: Order of the Gutter memorial to the Third Reich's Queen Mother

Order of the Gutter memorial to the Third Reich's Queen Mother

London - (Hellfire Club Mess): In a final act of appeasement of her Nazi forebear father Adolf Hitler Spoof dynastic matriarch Queen Elizabeth II unveiled a new memorial in The Mall today commemorating the late Queen Mother. The nine foot high bro...
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Funny story: New Queen Mother distilllery is opened

New Queen Mother distilllery is opened

A national monument to the Queen Mother is due to be opened by the Queen, the Buckingham Gin Palace distillery. Three generations of the Royal family will join Her Majesty for the ceremony in London, and it has been funded by the sale of £5 no-deposi...
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Funny story: Statue of Queen Mother unveiled

Statue of Queen Mother unveiled

A new statue of the Queen Mother by controversial sculptor Philip Jackson was unveiled today. The statue shows the Queen Mother in her heyday, holding a betting slip in one hand a glass of gin in the other. "It captures the essence of one's mot...
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Justin Bieber and North Korean Leader On Same Fantasy Basketball Site

Pop star Justin Bieber and North Korean despot Kim Jong Un are both on the same fantasy basketball website, battling it out in cyberspace over the comic collection Kim says Justin ripped him off on.

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