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Funny story: Queen Spots Rafael Nadal

Queen Spots Rafael Nadal

While flipping through the April issue of GQ, (Gentleman's Quarterly) Queen Elizabeth reportedly came to a screeching stop and was heard to whistle, "Hail Mary! Who's the suit?" Then added, "He looks familiar. But he's wearing clothes. Strange, I do...
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Funny story: "Walk this way..." School curriculum to include lessons in carriage and deportment

"Walk this way..." School curriculum to include lessons in carriage and deportment

Carriage and Deportment is to be introduced as a compulsory subject in a pilot project in British schools as of the new school year, with the aim of preparing British youth in, well, how to walk and stand around. Little known to the public, world...
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Funny story: Queen's Speech

Queen's Speech

During the Queen's speech at Christmas, the Queen is not expected to bang on about being in the same job for all of these years. As we all know, it is boring when Neville in accounts does it. Elizabeth II is instead going to speak about the world...
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Funny story: Queen Victoria Storms Onto Twitter!

Queen Victoria Storms Onto Twitter!

Let the royal catfight begin. Word is that the late Queen Victoria, enraged by the fact that the length of Queen Elizabeth's reign has now eclipsed her own (thereby creating tons of publicity for the current monarch), feels compelled to speak out...
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Funny story: Elizabeth Waynes

Elizabeth Waynes

Fans of Queen Elizabeth took to Twitter today to celebrate her overtaking Wayne Rooney's England scoring record. As she has been on the throne for 63 years and Rooney is only 30 it is clear who has wayned the longest. The national anthem has been...
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Funny story: Royal corgis victims of Rolf Harris

Royal corgis victims of Rolf Harris

A spokesman for Buckingham Palace has confirmed rumours circulating in London that the Royal corgis were amongst Rolf Harris' victims of sexual abuse. However rumours of a foursome involving the Duchess of Cornwell have been hotly denied by the Ro...
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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth Denounces Canadian Citizenship

Queen Elizabeth Denounces Canadian Citizenship

BUCKINGHAM PALACE - Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth II held a press conference today denouncing her Canadian citizenship. "I was born in the United Kingdom and lived exclusively in the United Kingdom. There have been trips across the pond. bu...
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Funny story: Queen Victoria Sells Her Granny Panties at UK Auction

Queen Victoria Sells Her Granny Panties at UK Auction

They sold for $16,500. Not a bad haul for the long-deceased monarch. She reportedly confided to friends, "I had to promise St. Peter a 10% commission in order to get a one-day earth pass, but it was well worth it." Queen Victoria plans future tri...
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Funny story: "Queen Not A Nazi," Says Unconvincing Palace Spokesman

"Queen Not A Nazi," Says Unconvincing Palace Spokesman

After The Sun newspaper published footage of our beloved monarch giving what appears to be a Nazi salute, Buckingham Palace officials have been quick to deny rumours her majesty was a Nazi sympathiser or even a member of the Hitler Youth. In the g...
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Funny story: The Queen to be buried under Reichstag beer tent

The Queen to be buried under Reichstag beer tent

Germany - A three day state visit to Sauerkrautland kicks off on Wednesday with a Bavarian beer drinking contest between Chancellor Angela Merkel and Queen Elizardbirth von Battenberg. Later the women are due to take part in a traditional bratwur...
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Funny story: Prince William's rowdy university buddy Gaz turns up at door, spends night on couch

Prince William's rowdy university buddy Gaz turns up at door, spends night on couch

Prince William and Kate Middleton had an unexpected visitor to Buckingham Palace when William's old university drinking buddy Gaz turned up at the front door asking to stay for a bit with them. William's old friend Gaz had been on a night out in Lon...
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Funny story: Superstitious? Saturday's 34th anniversary of Trooping the Colour potshots at Queen

Superstitious? Saturday's 34th anniversary of Trooping the Colour potshots at Queen

London - The Queen is totally freaked out about this Saturday's Trooping the Colour which occurs on the exact 34th anniversary of someone firing six blank shots at her while astride sidesaddle on royal steed Burn Knees. Uh, Burmese. 19 year-old...
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Funny story: What the Hell are the Royals Doing in New Zealand of All Places?

What the Hell are the Royals Doing in New Zealand of All Places?

In order to answer this simple question our magazine "Conned Weekly" contacted Lord Hiram Abiff Cook of the British Foreign Office London who candidly answered unaware that we had recorded the conversation. Here is what he said: Well, old sport...
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Funny story: So old and gaga there's mothballs up her fanny

So old and gaga there's mothballs up her fanny

London - "In addition to destroying insects such as moths and silverfish," the Lord Chamberlain Lord Luce-Cannon explained, "royal mothballs make useful stovepipe cleaners and snake repellants." The remarks come amid reports that Britain's Queen...
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Funny story: Jimmy Savile - Case Closed!

Jimmy Savile - Case Closed!

The Jimmy Savile Inquiry into paedophilia that has been ongoing since October 2012 has been officially closed. Sir Winston Pike conducting the inquiry said that the case has been officially closed from lack of reliable evidence. "After due consul...
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Funny story: Palace composting lav horror on Queen's birthday

Palace composting lav horror on Queen's birthday

Windsore Castle - An organic composting lavatory serving the Queen's private quarters had to be sluiced down with carbolic today after Her Majesty accidentally dropped her diamond tiara down its fathomless bottom. It was her 89th birthday, a cour...
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Funny story: TheSpoof.com Dead Right Again!

TheSpoof.com Dead Right Again!

Here is a verbatim report from an article in a leading British Paper. We are not making this up. This is actually what it said: "Sex scandal Labour grandee Lord Janner has been probed over ­allegations he was part of a ­Westminster paedophile ring. The Met police spent six months investigating claims the peer - said to be too frail from dementia to be prosecuted - was a guest at London sex a...
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Funny story: The Queen's April Fools Day spoof

The Queen's April Fools Day spoof

London - Her Majesty Queen Elizardbirth is planning to teach politicians a well deserved lesson by feigning death on April Fools Day. A number of courtiers are in on the jape which will see royal arselicker-in-chief cum Prime Monster David Cameron...
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Trump Offers to Sell Soul to Devil to Win U.S. Presidential Election

The Devil laughs maniacally, then refuses, saying, "I already own your soul, Trump!"
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