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Funny satire stories about Psychology

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Funny story: Man Loses The Plot

Man Loses The Plot

Imagine walking through town. You have a beard. The beard sits on your face. You realise this and so turn to look into a shoppe window hoping to catch a glimpse of you with your beard. There it is you think, still there. Anyway after this you turn a corner (as corners are notoriously difficult to navigate if one keeps walking in the same direction) and all of a sudden you are confronted with a her...
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Funny story: Many in U.S. Believe Mental Illness Caused By Demons

Many in U.S. Believe Mental Illness Caused By Demons

Science's goal is to create reasonable explanations (theories) to describe reality - theories that rely, not on feelings or passions, but on evidence. Yet substantial portions of the American people reject scientific conclusions. In the fields of p...
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Funny story: New DSM V Disorder: Gun Fetishist's Separation Anxiety

New DSM V Disorder: Gun Fetishist's Separation Anxiety

The new DSM V categorization of psychiatric disorders published by the American Psychiatric Association as a new description of separation anxiety and a new category of fetishes. In the DSM IV these disorders related only to people. But now they h...
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Funny story: "Assholism" Proposed as New Personality Disorder

"Assholism" Proposed as New Personality Disorder

The American Pyschological Association (APA) is formally considering adding "assholism" as an official personality disorder to the next edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, as announced by a leading psychiatrist, who...
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Funny story: General Admits, 'most recruits heartbroken.'

General Admits, 'most recruits heartbroken.'

A high up Military Psychologist has admitted most of the young men who join the military are heartbroken rejects of society. 'I'm not saying all recruits sign up because of emotional distance, or detachment from self. But I am noticing a trend.'...
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Funny story: Made-up United set for promotion, Imaginary Town to be relegated

Made-up United set for promotion, Imaginary Town to be relegated

After the opening match of the season, Made-up United's magnificent two goal win over Imaginary Town has Made-up's fans looking froward to a promotion party at the end of the season. "We were magnificent," said Dominic Fridge, a life-long Made-up...
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Funny story: Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

In the bad old days of psychotherapy, the therapist would feel the skull and determine a personality from the various bumps and ridges over the cranium. "The theory," said Mac Buck, editor of App World! magazine, "is that the brain's various cont...
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Funny story: Mathematical Model Predicts Politicians Behavior

Mathematical Model Predicts Politicians Behavior

New York NY: The Columbia University School of Abnormal Psychology has developed a mathematical computer model to predict the interests of current and former political figures after they leave office. Professor Freud (no relation to Sigmund) expla...
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Funny story: Australia To Introduce Personality Testing To Identify Dangerous Dogs

Australia To Introduce Personality Testing To Identify Dangerous Dogs

In an attempt to curb attacks on people by dangerous dogs, the Australian Veterinary Association (AVA) has proposed the introduction of research into conducting personality tests for canines. AVA spokesman, Jake Russell, told us "We have two issue...
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Funny story: Bank robbed...by a gorilla, nobody saw a thing

Bank robbed...by a gorilla, nobody saw a thing

The Dorking high street bank, Dorking High Street Bank of Dorking, was robbed on Friday morning by a daring bank robber. Although later analysis of the CCTV footage clearly showed the robber, nobody in the bank saw the robber, and the vast majority o...
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Funny story: Complexes and suchlike

Complexes and suchlike

According to Carl Jung, (1875 -1961), a complex is 'a core pattern of emotions, memories, perceptions, and wishes organized around a common theme.' It is 'perfectly normal to have complexes because everyone has emotional experiences that affect the psyche. Although they are normal, negative complexes can cause pain and suffering'. An example given is the case of an individual, in childhood, who...
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Funny story: Psychology Professor creates new syndrome in his lunch break

Psychology Professor creates new syndrome in his lunch break

I'm sitting in Starbucks sat opposite the man of the moment - Martin Gamble, Professor of Behaviour, Undestanding and Motivation at the University of Redbrick. Martin has a unique gift, he is able to create a new Psychological Syndromes in his lunch break I ask Martin how he does it? Martin laughs and throws back his lustrous brown hair. He has a warm laugh. It's like taking a bath in rich crea...
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Funny story: 'The Human Brain Rewrites "Boring" Speech', Claims Study

'The Human Brain Rewrites "Boring" Speech', Claims Study

The human brain has the ability to make even the most boring stories vivid and entertaining, a leading brain scientist claims. This is because the brain's 'inner voice' can talk over even the most tedious speaker, according to Professor Jens Convo...
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Funny story: Happy Monday? Don't Make Me Laugh, Says Local Grump

Happy Monday? Don't Make Me Laugh, Says Local Grump

A local man has pooh-poohed the notion that today is the first happy day of the year. Psychologists claim that today, Monday, January 30, is the first happy day of the year because most Britons have just had their first pay cheque and have also pr...
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Funny story: Link Discovered Between British Football and Crime Rates

Link Discovered Between British Football and Crime Rates

Exeter Devon, UK: The results of a one year psychological study conducted by Dr. M. Shuttlecock, a noted London psychologist, has been published in the Surrey Psychological Observational Obsessive Functions (SPOOF) journal. The study investigated whe...
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Funny story: Train Spotting makes it into the Psychologists Handbook

Train Spotting makes it into the Psychologists Handbook

The definitive guide to what is a mental illness and what is normal behaviour is due for release at the end of the month. Previous additions to the tome have been ADHD and body dismorphia. "Until it is in the book," said the Handbook's editor,...
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Funny story: New Chelsea Boss Andre Villas-Boas Doomed To PL Failure

New Chelsea Boss Andre Villas-Boas Doomed To PL Failure

A group of leading sports psychologists are claiming that newly installed Chelsea boss, Andre Villas-Boas is doomed to Premier League failure, and that's before he even starts! Villas-Boas, who moved to Stamford Bridge from Porto this week has alr...
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Funny story: Larry O'Mara Given an Honorary Harvard Psychology Degree

Larry O'Mara Given an Honorary Harvard Psychology Degree

Cambridge MA: Larry O'Mara the owner of Larry's Bar and Grill, a working class tavern in this city, was presented an honorary PHD degree in psychology by Harvard University. The degree was in recognition of Larry's counseling people in his establishm...
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Teachers sentenced for sex with students

A former female high school teacher received six months in jail for having sex with a male student, while a male teacher at the same school received a six-year sentence for bedding a coed pupil.

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