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Funny satire stories about Pork

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Funny story: Ham-fisted idea becomes a reality

Ham-fisted idea becomes a reality

A British man has become the first person in the world to undergo a revolutionary new form of surgery to restore his hands, which were horrifically destroyed years ago while he was wrestling a wild boar. Manuel Trotter, 45, of Scunthorpe, now has mec...
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Funny story: Chef Chang to open Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! on St. Patrick's Day

Chef Chang to open Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! on St. Patrick's Day

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS - Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! will open in Chicago on St. Patrick's Day. Famous restauranteur, Chef Chip Chang, explained the theme of his newest Chicago restaurant, "It will be all about pork: pork chops, pork rolls, pork roasts, pork...
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Funny story: Horse meat found in Micro Pig value bacon nuggets

Horse meat found in Micro Pig value bacon nuggets

Tests on a major supermarket chain's Value Bacon Nuggets have revealed a micro horse meat content of between 20% and 30%, the Ministry of Food and Fisheries announced this morning. Sources of the meat have been located and are closed pending investi...
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Funny story: Auntie Jean Advises - Howie Feltersnatch from Cockermouth

Auntie Jean Advises - Howie Feltersnatch from Cockermouth

Auntie Jean: I would like to keep a male Wild Boar in the house for a pet and to teach it to find truffles. I have chosen a male pig because I have heard that the Wild Boar sows suffer from extreme PMS. I understand that many celebrities have Pot Bellied Pigs as domestic pets and know that they are basically clean animals and can be taught to go outside to do their poo and stuff. I intend to...
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Funny story: Pig meat found in hot cross buns

Pig meat found in hot cross buns

A spokesman for Britain's leading bakery chain admitted that pigmeat was used in millions of hot cross buns on sale this weekend. Most of the major supermarkets have this product on their shelves, discounted at one pound per bun. The chief Rabbi i...
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Funny story: Britney Spears won't eat Pork

Britney Spears won't eat Pork

Britney Spears panicked when she saw her six foot body guard pass out at her dinner table after he ate homemade pork chops prepared by Spears. Britney Spears was not affected because she was eating Salmon fish at the time. Doctors at the hospi...
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Funny story: Allies to use weaponry made from pork

Allies to use weaponry made from pork

Recent rhetoric emerging from Tripoli exhorts Islamic fundamentalists to keep fighting, as dying in battle for their God is the greatest honour. MI6 have been working hard to find a solution to this depth of extremism, and they have come up with...
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Funny story: Lab Test Results Indicate Hot Dogs Contain Lips, No Assholes

Lab Test Results Indicate Hot Dogs Contain Lips, No Assholes

A team of research scientists from Kentucky State University have concluded a year-long study of the average American hot dog to determine once and for all if they are, in fact, made from lips and assholes. The results indicate that hot dogs do indee...
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Funny story: Pork Barrel Polka

Pork Barrel Polka

In a secret gathering held in a ballroom beneath the capitol building last night, Senator Ann Whatatush, republican from the state of Kansas was awarded a one million dollar prize, mismanaged out of the defense budget, for the years best pork barrel...
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Funny story: 3 pork eaters die as piggies seek revenge!

3 pork eaters die as piggies seek revenge!

UK pork eaters are being warned to avoid the fatty, pumped up with hormones, meat? Three people have died in the UK and many more have fallen ill with the porky transmitted bug, hepatitis E. At first nutritional experts thought it was due to pork...
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Funny story: Walls have Ears!

Walls have Ears!

Hard pressed British families will be glad to hear that Walls, producer of their beloved "Banger" is branching out and will shortly be marketing "Pigs Ears" as "a tasty snack the whole family can enjoy anytime! "Gordon Brown was our inspiration. W...
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Funny story: Hog Warts, Restless Pig Syndrome Also on Rise

Hog Warts, Restless Pig Syndrome Also on Rise

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Even as the World Health Organization struggles to contain a recent outbreak of swine flu, a startling number of other swine related diseases and illnesses have begun to crop up across the globe. "This latest development is esp...
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Funny story: Health Alert: Stop eating bacon butties to avoid swine flu. Corrie Streeet's Roy's Rolls to take bacon butties off menu

Health Alert: Stop eating bacon butties to avoid swine flu. Corrie Streeet's Roy's Rolls to take bacon butties off menu

LONDON, UK: The Health Ministry has issued more swine flu alerts and precautionary measures. The Health Secretary has said: "We are now asking Brits to avoid eating bacon butties - just to be on the safe side". A bitter Onslow Dole and his wife...
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Funny story: "Porkomputer" causes moslem misery

"Porkomputer" causes moslem misery

The marketing of a computer which contains elements made from pork has angered some people in the Moslem community. The Tatyama p-01x has been on sale now for two months, and for reasons which the manufacturer has not revealed, has pork-fat as a...
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Funny story: Irish Pork is Pig Meat

Irish Pork is Pig Meat

DUBLIN, Idaho - Sausage meat that ended up in animal feed could force farmers to destroy 10 pigs or goats, safety officials said Tomorrow as the Dublin Union advised that Indian restaurants did not need to ban Irish chicken. The Bus Safety Authori...
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Funny story: Millions Flee Ireland in Pork Famine

Millions Flee Ireland in Pork Famine

County Downwind, Ireland - This lush Irish countryside, once brown as far as the eye could see with pig farms, now lies empty and desolate in the wake of the recent devastating tainted pork recall. The Irish government has acted quickly to recall...
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Funny story: Dodgy Irish Pork Behind Royal Swine Fever Attack

Dodgy Irish Pork Behind Royal Swine Fever Attack

London - (Royal Ass Mess): Toxic behavior by the lard-arsed Duchess of Pork's Provisional IRA pals may be behind the Queen sickening according to Palace medical sources. HM the Puppet Monarch was quarantined on Saturday night after a rasher (sic)...
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Funny story: Rogue Rabbi Revelation!

Rogue Rabbi Revelation!

Rogue Rabbi Rick Rickstein recently revealed reservations regarding one of the central beliefs of his religion. Rickstein, long time friend of Mel Brooks, admitted that "We could have been a bit hasty about the whole Jesus thing" Acknowledging tha...
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Angry Birds CEO to step down

Angry Birds CEO Mikael Hed will not head the Finnish company next year; he is being replaced because he is not "choleric" enough to effectively represent the hostile video game franchise.

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