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Brexit deal close to being crimped off

Funny story: Brexit deal close to being crimped off

After two and a half years of straining and pushing, Brexit is almost ready to splash down into the toilet bowl of political reality, and flushed into the sewers of history like the steaming turd of an idea that it is. Brexit has marched through t...

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Belfast Marathon Sprint Finish Ruined As Runner Slips On Dog Shit

Funny story: Belfast Marathon Sprint Finish Ruined As Runner Slips On Dog Shit

There was real drama in the finishing stretch in the Belfast Marathon today, when, coming into the final 100 yards of the race, three men still in contention entered into a neck-and-neck sprint finish, only for one of them to bow out 10 yards from th...

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The new Dealthy Arlines will feature a poop deck

Funny story: The new Dealthy Arlines will feature a poop deck

Atlanta, GA - (Dogged News) Spokesman Roevier K. Knign for Dealthy Airlines, announced today at 8:32 AM, a new super-saver airfare rate for animal lovers. The new flat rate of fifty dollars will fly you AND your large dog anywhere Dealthy flies.

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Man Fell Off Motorbike Into Pile Of Cow Dung

Funny story: Man Fell Off Motorbike Into Pile Of Cow Dung

Poor weather conditions in the Battambang area that left some roads barely passable, and others extremely treacherous, were the cause of several accidents on Monday, and one, in particular, involving a man who fell from a motorbike into a pile of cow...

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Toilet Was 'Out Of Order', But Man Was Desperate

Funny story: Toilet Was 'Out Of Order', But Man Was Desperate

A toilet that was displaying an 'Out Of Order' sign was the scene of an unsavoury incident in Hull recently, when a man who was shopping in the city centre realized he was desperate for a babber. Moys Kenwood, 55, was ambling vacantly around the P...

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Marriages Where One Of The Couple Shits The Bed, More Likely To End In Divorce - Study

Funny story: Marriages Where One Of The Couple Shits The Bed, More Likely To End In Divorce - Study

Marriages where one of the couples shits the bed, are more likely to end in divorce, says a study I made up off the top of my head today. Divorce rates worldwide have soared over the last 20 years, but it's amongst the bedshitting community that s...

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Old Man Shit Himself On Bus

Funny story: Old Man Shit Himself On Bus

There were squished-up faces aplenty this morning on a bus full of passengers going to work in Hull, after an old man aboard was caught short, and shit himself. The man, who declined to give his name, was sat on the 'circular' number 2 service tha...

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School accidentally serves feces for lunch, nobody notices

Funny story: School accidentally serves feces for lunch, nobody notices

Squaresville Middle School accidentally served fecal matter for lunch. Surprisingly, students commented that it tasted better than what was served before. Bobby Smith, one of the students, said, "After months of giving us unidentified green stuff,...

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Elderly minister emits giant turd, names it Bernard, enrolls it in Harvard!

The Reverend T. J. McCorkle of Louisburg, North Carolina held a news conference this morning in Raleigh to announce that he had, in the last day, emitted a giant turd. The emission weighed six pounds, seven ounces and McCorkle stated, "It was the...

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Merde On The Orient Express

Funny story: Merde On The Orient Express

There was a major controversy in South London on Saturday afternoon, when French football supporters travelling to a game in Leytonstone were confronted by a problem they could not, in their wildest dreams, ever have imagined - a merde on the Orient...

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Crapper in the Crapper

Funny story: Crapper in the Crapper

Shithole, New JoiseyThom Crapper, 42, the former superintendent of a New Joisey Skool District, took a leave of flatulence—uh, absence—after he was identified as the “mystery pooper” who left “deposits” on a rival high school's track. “I couldn't hel...

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Elderly Spoof writer seeks new career as: Poop Consultant!

The Reverend T. J. McCorkle, well known spoof writer and founder of the Fart Farm initiative in North Carolina announced at a press conference this morning that in an effort to further help his fellow man and particularly the elderly, he was founding...

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Man Followed Through

Funny story: Man Followed Through

There was an embarrassing situation to deal with for one man this morning, after a fart he attempted to release from between his buttocks, turned into something more serious, and he followed through. The incident happened in a bank in Battambang w...

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College Student Takes a Dump and Then Makes His Roommates Look at It

Funny story: College Student Takes a Dump and Then Makes His Roommates Look at It

Cockland University. Roy Bunders, 20, took a dump so incredibly big last Thursday that he immediately felt the need to show it to his roommates. "I had just eaten at the cafeteria, and I felt the urgent need to go to the restroom," he said.

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Professional Man Poops in His Pants at Work

Our emergency news reporting team rushed to the home of Mr. Robert Semen, a mechanical engineer at a local factory, last Tuesday, only to find out that he left work early because he pooped in his pants. "I started feeling ill around 11:30 am, and...

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Man Delayed Flight By Taking A Dump

Funny story: Man Delayed Flight By Taking A Dump

Airline passengers at Manchester's Ringway airport were in uproar yesterday evening, after a flight was delayed when another one of the passengers was forced to visit the lavatory at the Gate before boarding. The flight, from Manchester to Bangkok...

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Little Wilmer Loses Dog Diarrhea Record To Poozle, A Female Beagle

Funny story: Little Wilmer Loses Dog Diarrhea Record To Poozle, A Female Beagle

BILLINGSGATE POST: You have probably heard the phrase, "faster than pizza going through a dog." Well, students from a high school in Denver, Colorado concocted a science project to find out how fast that was; an experiment where they tracked how lo...

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US 'Super Pooper' Mounts Defence

Funny story: US 'Super Pooper' Mounts Defence

The man at the centre of the 'Super Pooper' scandal has said he has every confidence in his legal team, and expects an apology from his school and the police. The pooping super has been charged with "lewdness, littering and defecating in public",...

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Breaking news…

Trump Says Democrats Should Thank Him for Being Such A Terrible President

...Because they never would've won the House by such a wide margin without him!
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