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Funny story: Minister "Tied Up" by Relationship Revalations

Minister "Tied Up" by Relationship Revalations

John Twitingdale, Minister for Media and other sports, has been tied up with business and couldn't find time to speak to our political commentator John Witt about some of the sports he finds attractive. I was sent a missive from Twitingdale's secr...
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Funny story: Popular politician vows to take on the Wall Street "Big Money" or some crap

Popular politician vows to take on the Wall Street "Big Money" or some crap

A local political candidate recently promised that, if elected, he'd fight those "big wall street swindlers" and maybe "take on those fat cat bankers" or "something like that." Speaking at a local gathering in front of the Piggly Wiggly, the ca...
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Funny story: Bernie Sanders Unveils Plan to have the United States Invade Socialist Nations

Bernie Sanders Unveils Plan to have the United States Invade Socialist Nations

Today, in a local debate against democratic candidate Hillary Clinton, Sanders delivered his plan to have the US break off from the United Nations, and to put 100% of Military funding into invading Cuba, Scandinavia, and China. "We need to conquer th...
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Funny story: American Political Dictionary (excerpts)

American Political Dictionary (excerpts)

The 4th edition of the American Political Dictionary has just been published. Below is an excerpt. Available at bookstores nowhere. Active Shooter n. A white wingnut and/or terrorist with an assault weapon exercising his Second Amendment rights. See National Rifle Association. Christ-inanity: A system of belief, often held by Christian fundamentalists of a certain stripe, which advocates t...
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Funny story: There's A Reason Grandma Sits That Way...

There's A Reason Grandma Sits That Way...

This leap year afforded the African American community an extra day of Black History Month; let's hope it was enjoyed because it may be the last one America ever has. The election season has been ugly to say the least. Amidst the turmoil of the electorate, politicians have been especially on edge. One contentious issue: black lives. Yes, they matter- but in the eyes of Washington's elite they...
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Funny story: Donald Trump Nominates Himself for Vacant Supreme Court Slot

Donald Trump Nominates Himself for Vacant Supreme Court Slot

Following the death of United States Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump, apparently unclear on the rules governing judicial procedure, attempted to nominate himself to fill the vacant judicial slot.
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Funny story: Recent national study discovers surprising views on Bernie Sanders

Recent national study discovers surprising views on Bernie Sanders

A recent study conducted by PEW Research Center in Washington, D.C was made available to the public this past Monday. The aims of the study were to further understand the common political beliefs among the American public today. The think tank's thre...
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Funny story: Guantánamo Detainee Refuses Offer of Release After 14 Years in Prison and Tosses Conical Hat in the Ring

Guantánamo Detainee Refuses Offer of Release After 14 Years in Prison and Tosses Conical Hat in the Ring

WASHINGTON - Three Guantánamo detainees were slated to leave the American prison in Cuba this week after 14 years in captivity, but early Wednesday morning, only two were willing to board the plane. The third - Mohammed Ali Abdullah Bwazir of Yemen -...
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Funny story: Presidential candidates to personally test Flint's water

Presidential candidates to personally test Flint's water

Flint, Michigan - Determined to win back the good name of government, all of the remaining contenders for the presidency have agreed to personally test and evaluate the municipal water supply of this beleaguered city. "How bad can it be?" dema...
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Funny story: NYC creating jobs for its carriage-less horses

NYC creating jobs for its carriage-less horses

New York - Animal activists came one step closer to ridding Central Park of the carriage horse trade, proposing a variety of new employment opportunities in other fields for the equines. "It's all about jobs and the dignity of work for these noble...
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Funny story: Barack Demonstrates Why he is President

Barack Demonstrates Why he is President

Washington Post: Washington. President Barack Obama today took the podium during a philosophical debate at Boston University. In a speech prepared by his advisers the President 'showed' awesome knowledge of Oriental and Western philosophy until h...
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Funny story: Pushy Pyong Yang Plans Planetary Plantation of Pluto

Pushy Pyong Yang Plans Planetary Plantation of Pluto

During a on-air debate on North Korean State TV, an ex-KGB agent claims that Kim yong Un intends to annex the tiny exo-planet. However dissent is brewing among a handful of his advisers, namely Kim yong Deux, his Chief Science Officer. Deux has...
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Funny story: Doctors psychoanalyze Trump's slump plus Director of Inherently Nasty Chorale quits

Doctors psychoanalyze Trump's slump plus Director of Inherently Nasty Chorale quits

Insiders have insisted the Trump campaign is in trouble, due to his numbers dropping plus personal problems and defection of the Director of The Inherently Nasty Chorale. This Director, insisting on anonymity, stated that The Inherently Nasty Chor...
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Funny story: The Peculiar Life and Lonely Death of the Last Revolutionary

The Peculiar Life and Lonely Death of the Last Revolutionary

Communist espousing, failed cult leader, bigot, and black power feminist, Binacra Washington died in a Baltimore assisted living facility Wednesday, she was 71. Born in Atlanta, GA. April, 3rd 1944 she was the daughter of Gully and Ginger Washing...
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Funny story: Trump buys Washington DC; Now Owns Presidency

Trump buys Washington DC; Now Owns Presidency

In what could be regarded as the most ridiculous act in recorded history, Donald Trump, billionaire pariah and 2016 presidential candidate, has decided to purchase our nation's capitol, thereby destroying the presidential election forever. As cit...
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Funny story: GOP cancels debates! Schedules nationally televised Circle Jerk on Fox News!

GOP cancels debates! Schedules nationally televised Circle Jerk on Fox News!

"Shocked but not surprised," stated a well known political analyst when a spokesman for the Republican Party announced the cancellation of future debates and substituted a nationally televised Circle Jerk to be shown on Fox News. A Fox News spokesma...
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Funny story: Hillary Clinton Turns Opponent Scott Walker Into Kitten; Scientists Baffled

Hillary Clinton Turns Opponent Scott Walker Into Kitten; Scientists Baffled

Recently, GOP candidate Scott Walker dropped out of the presidential race. Officials wondered why until a surprise camera flash-mob on Hillary Clinton revealed that Walker had been abducted by Clinton and genetically engineered into a kitten. Whe...
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Funny story: Ben Carson: "If Jesus Had a Gun, He'd Be Alive Today."

Ben Carson: "If Jesus Had a Gun, He'd Be Alive Today."

SEATTLE (The Kal-El Report)- Republican presidential candidate Ben Carson told Fox News' Greta Van Susteren in her "Off the Record" show this week, "If our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ had an assault rifle or even a sidearm like a Glock, he would be...
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Showing page 1 (of 63 pages)
Breaking News...

Wal-Mart Awards Health Insurance Coupons to Employees

Wal-Mart has issued coupons to their part-time employees for 10% off prescriptions and aspirin.
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