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Funny story: Police arrest man who failed to use knife and fork in Didsbury restaurant

Police arrest man who failed to use knife and fork in Didsbury restaurant

Staff and diners were left disgusted when a man eating at a restaurant blatantly refused to use his knife and fork and ate with his fingers. The 52-year-old was eating a margherita pizza at Zizzi's restaurant in Didsbury, Manchester at 1pm today.
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Funny story: 'Heartless' thief steals Disability Scooter

'Heartless' thief steals Disability Scooter

A heartless thief broke into the property of locally named Spack McCrackin, in Cradley Heath, West Midlands, and 'fled' on the £2,000 machine. Det Con Stirling Moss said: "This is a very upsetting case as one person's thoughtless crime as left the...
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Funny story: Shopping centre evacuated after spillage

Shopping centre evacuated after spillage

A busy shopping centre was evacuated after a water spillage occurred inside. The spillage is thought to have started on the ground floor of Wilkinson in The Pentagon Shopping Centre in Chatham, Kent at 5:30pm while a janitor was cleaning the floor...
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Funny story: 10 year old girl arrested after drawing hopscotch grid on the pavement outside her home

10 year old girl arrested after drawing hopscotch grid on the pavement outside her home

* Danielle Blackburn was arrested by police for drawing on the pavement outside her home in Kent * Father, Mick Blackburn, fully supports police over the arrest  A schoolgirl was arrested by police for drawing a hopscotch grid on the pavement,...
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Funny story: Police officer sues Starbucks for million dollars. Gained 300 pounds on free doughnuts!

Police officer sues Starbucks for million dollars. Gained 300 pounds on free doughnuts!

The Raleigh News & Observer is reporting this morning that a Raleigh police officer is suing Starbucks for one million dollars. His lawsuit states that he gained over three hundred pounds in three years from free donuts he had been given at the...
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Funny story: Baltimore Cops Use Flash Mob Tactics

Baltimore Cops Use Flash Mob Tactics

Baltimore, MD - In a sneaky and cunning display of police tactical maneuvers, the Baltimore Police Department have implemented new and creative ways to round up would-be rioters. Several dozen officers were dressed up and placed around the downtown a...
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Funny story: Criminal sues police over unflattering photo-fit

Criminal sues police over unflattering photo-fit

Career criminal, Ashley Frat, 27, has reportedly been awarded a considerable out of court settlement following his recent legal action against the Metropolitan Police. Mr Frat was convicted earlier this month for aggravated burglary following a ra...
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Funny story: Martial Law to be declared after Clarkson sacking

Martial Law to be declared after Clarkson sacking

London, England: Following the sacking of Jeremy Clarkson and the postponement of Top Gear, threats of a serious nature from overseas have been made against BBC Director General. Whilst an overseas email threatening the BBC Director General has res...
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Funny story: Obummer promises investigation "by and by"

Obummer promises investigation "by and by"

SECOND CITY -- The Windy City, home to Prezident Obummer and his one-time chief of staff, Mayor-for-Now Rahm Emanuel, is (allegedly) operating a "black site" jail where prisoners are (allegedly) denied their Constitutional rights and are (allegedly)...
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Funny story: Police have tazered kids, but it's an act of kindness

Police have tazered kids, but it's an act of kindness

British Police have multi - tazered University Students, now it appears they have tazered kids, teenagers of 14. 'It's really just to give them a light reprimand, as opposed to being shot dead', says DCI Jonny Tennyson 'We are issued with bulle...
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Funny story: Health officials warn "Toblerone in a fridge" is a lethal weapon

Health officials warn "Toblerone in a fridge" is a lethal weapon

Top health officials have issued a warning to people not to put Toblerones in a fridge. They state that when the triangular chocolate bar becomes cold and hard it can become a "lethal weapon capable of damaging members of the public and even buildin...
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Funny story: Police seek clues in Cosby sitcoms

Police seek clues in Cosby sitcoms

Now that Bill Cosby has been accused of sexually assaulting myriads of women, authorities are reviewing the episodes of his TV sitcoms, named after himself, to see whether any episodes contain clues concerning the alleged assaults. Cosby starred i...
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Funny story: The Dirty half Dozen

The Dirty half Dozen

The Metropolitan Police reveal their 6 most wanted criminals this Christmas including an 88 year man, Norman Todger, 'who attacked an elderly neighbour with a worn out rampant rabbit after finding him in bed shagging his wife,Ethel aged 90'! Crime...
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Funny story: Bikini Babes Stage "Pro Police Protest" At Florida Golf Club

Bikini Babes Stage "Pro Police Protest" At Florida Golf Club

Holding signs saying "Cops are hot" and "Cops do it better" local bikini babes swarmed the "Flamingo and the Raven Golf Club" in Sundown Florida. About 100 of the hottest chicks in south Florida attended the bikini and thong protest to show their su...
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Funny story: Man Shot By Cop, Cuffed Then Fined $100

Man Shot By Cop, Cuffed Then Fined $100

A case that is just one among a number that caused Eric Holder, the US attorney general, to sharply censure the, let's call it, the Cleavageland police department this week, is one where a "John Doe," who is a black man was shot in the chest by a pol...
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Funny story: Overheard in a Staten Island Grand Jury Room

Overheard in a Staten Island Grand Jury Room

Almost New York - The judge in the Eric Gardner police brutality case put a lid on the release of evidence and souvenir transcripts used by the grand jury to reach its mystifying decision. Good thing we had our judicial fly on the wall to listen in on juror comments. Here are some of their choice remarks: "I'm glad I live on an island." "If he wanted to breathe, he should've brought alon...
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Funny story: Ferguson learns valuable lesson: Don't announce bad news at night

Ferguson learns valuable lesson: Don't announce bad news at night

Ferguson, Mo. - Businesses were ablaze and bullets flew overhead throughout the night in Ferguson as officials chose the late evening as the best time to announce that a white police officer would not be indicted in the shooting of an unarmed black t...
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Funny story: I'm long, long, long gone.

I'm long, long, long gone.

Police have issued details regarding the decomposed body of an elderly man who was recently discovered in a Tesco car park in Romford, Essex, where they say he may have lain dead for many, many years or more! Officers found the badly decomposed bo...
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Chris Christi Licks Sickness

As a result of an intensive three-year psychological reconditioning program under the supervision of Rick Santorum and Mike Huckabee, Chris Christi is almost completely cured of his homosexual disease
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