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Police force report shows "significant improvement"

The police watchdog announced on Tuesday “Woof, woof, woof.” No, not really, we just thought we’d open with a joke because the world is such a terrible place full of shit and hate right now. Stark, but true. A police watchdog has actually said: "H...

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Hero Broward Sheriff's Deputies Pull Over Old Lady

Funny story: Hero Broward Sheriff's Deputies Pull Over Old Lady

Four sheriff deputies have emotionally recalled the terrifying moment they surrounded a vehicle driven by 85-year old Mable Gosling who had failed to indicate a left turn after exiting a shopping mall about 10 miles from where an armed robbery was in...

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Local Man has bad Dreams, turns himself into Police*

Funny story: Local Man has bad Dreams, turns himself into Police*

Portland. A local man, Carl Schlipty, a faucet hinge cleaner, turned himself into to police custody recently after experiencing several "unsettling" dreams involving tornadoes. "I was afraid I'd be a danger to myself and to others. I just couldn...

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Man reported shouting at a Sports Game on his TV. Suspecting possible self-harming, Police taser and kill him to protect him.

Funny story: Man reported shouting at a Sports Game on his TV. Suspecting possible self-harming, Police taser and kill him to protect him.

In Canberra Australia and man who was a bit drunk and was shouting in his lounge room was deemed to be a huge public risk and was tasered to death. Police say he was shouting nasty things at them, like get out of my house you pack of storm trooper...

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Police issued new cars on Humberside! Fairground dodgem cars take over from Pandas!

Funny story: Police issued new cars on Humberside! Fairground dodgem cars take over from Pandas!

The Humberside police force have been issued with a new fleet of open-top cars called Dodgems! Originally, the cars were only seen at fairgrounds all over the country. Police on Humberside have been trying out their latest fleet of vehicles at fai...

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Police Shoot, Kill, Nude Pregnant Woman

An uneasy feeling permeated the squad room as half a dozen or so officers waited for Chief Backoff's appearance. They knew the Chief's reprimand would be harsh, biting and very personal. After all, the shooting of a nude woman had never occurred here before. And two of the three cops who pulled the triggers were in the room. Abruptly the squad room door banged open and Chief Backoff barreled i...

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Early on, Planet Earth looked like a giant jelly doughnut, scientists theorize

Funny story: Early on, Planet Earth looked like a giant jelly doughnut, scientists theorize

The latest in science news theorizes that the earth was originally a Synestia - it took on a giant jelly doughnut shape early in its history, about 4.5 billion years ago. Some scientists believe the earth was originally a blob of mostly vaporized...

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New robot invented to help stop certain racially-motivated attacks

Funny story: New robot invented to help stop certain racially-motivated attacks

Spottedville officials have had enough of a sudden increase in specific racially-motivated crimes. According to Mayor Jenny Smith, "You usually don't hear much about anti-white racism, and it isn't politically correct to mention it. We had to do...

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Schmidt & Weissen to produce bidirectional pistol

Funny story: Schmidt & Weissen to produce bidirectional pistol

Schmidt & Weissen, a major gun manufacturer in the US, is developing a bidirectional pistol. Paul Gant of Schmidt & Weissen says, "This is the only gun I'd recommend to scumbags and known gang members." The police have mixed feelings about...

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Gideon Strikes Back!

George Osborne has called Teresa may "a dead woman walking" after her election cock up. Unsurprisingly coming from the mouth of a man who we believe has been dead for some time and merely jumps his consciousness into recently deceased bodies. Look in...

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Police, Rescue Respond to Unusual Kidnapping

Funny story: Police, Rescue Respond to Unusual Kidnapping

Denver, CO [PP] -- Police and paramedics responded to what had to be their most unusual kidnapping case. A man who had not opened his refrigerator door in more than two years had the shock of his life. When he finally got around to opening the refrig...

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Police baffled at the occurrence of spots all over town

Squaresville police are trying to figure out the meaning of what looks like a new form of vandalism throughout their town. Nearly everything is getting covered with spots. This was first discovered when police officers started getting calls about the...

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Australian police dog sacked because he was too soft!

Funny story: Australian police dog sacked because he was too soft!

The world of canines wanting to become police dogs in Australia is tough as the case of Gavel, a Queensland German Shepard proves; he got the boot for being too soft! Gavel went through all the training required, but during certain exercises, he w...

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White Police Officer Almost Doesn't Shoot Handcuffed Unarmed Black Man

Funny story: White Police Officer Almost Doesn't Shoot Handcuffed Unarmed Black Man

A Georgia state law enforcement officer was commended for following procedure during a routine traffic stop that nearly turned tragic earlier this week. Deputy Jason Hancock continued police department tradition of shooting unarmed black men, but...

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Cop Angered By Krispy Kreme Box

Funny story: Cop Angered By Krispy Kreme Box

An unnamed, unidentified police officer has claimed in a blog post online that his box of donuts from Krispy Kreme were graffitied when he received them with the phrase, "Black Lives Matter." The alleged incident occurred in New Smyrna, Georgia, a...

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Left Wingers To Help NRA & Gun Makers

Funny story: Left Wingers To Help NRA & Gun Makers

CHICAGO TRIBUNE AP -- Since the November election gun sales, which more than doubled under Obama, have been dropping sharply, because of lessened fears that the government will take away the assault rifles and other armaments we need to protect...

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Killer Sock Puppets: The Return

Funny story: Killer Sock Puppets: The Return

An update in the horrific Sock Puppet Terrorisation (SPT) craze that has been sweeping two coastal towns. Police raided an address in Aldbourgh last night and confiscated over £50 in sock puppet making technology. No one was at the property but offic...

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Philadelphia Fraternal Order of Police Head Clarifies "Clinton Blew Us Off" Comment As Reason For Trump Endorsement

Funny story: Philadelphia Fraternal Order of Police Head Clarifies "Clinton Blew Us Off" Comment As Reason For Trump Endorsement

Philadelphia - One day after announcing that his union was endorsing Republican nominee Donald Trump for President of the United States, John McNesby, the President of the Philadelphia Fraternal Order of Police backtracked on his comment that Democr...

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Breaking news…

Bill Cosby Contacts Kim Kardashian to See if She Can Get Him Pardoned

Kim told Cosby he would have to get in line behind Robert Mueller, Suge Knight, and Jared Folger.
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