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Funny satire stories about Phone calls

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson Cuts Off Weiner

Robert Pattinson Cuts Off Weiner

The big news here just about an hour ago is that somehow or other, actor Robert Pattison has cut off weiner but we are awaiting more news on the subject. OK, here's a spokeswoman for Pattinson. "Ladies and gentlemen of the Press, I am here to a...
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Funny story: FCC Announces Phone Service Subsidy for Murderers

FCC Announces Phone Service Subsidy for Murderers

The Federal Communications Commission today took long-overdue steps to ensure that long-distance rates made by convicted felons are just, reasonable and fair. Studies have determined that law-abiding taxpayers will pick up the cost. The Commis...
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Funny story: Pakistan Outsources A Call Center To Cleveland

Pakistan Outsources A Call Center To Cleveland

CLEVELAND, Ohio - In an interesting twist of events, a telemarketing group in Pakistan has just outsourced its phone telemarketing program to The Hello Telemarketing Agency which is based in Cleveland. Pakistan's Yak Yak Telemarketing Agency, whic...
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Funny story: My life as a man #37

My life as a man #37

Another day, another opportunity to fall on my ass! A gal I've known since grade school called me this afternoon to ask if I'd like to get together for lunch tomorrow, to talk about the old days.... OK, before I begin, if you've not read any of my other stories, you may be unaware that no woman I have ever known EVER calls me to ask me to go to lunch, to talk about old times with her, or any...
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Funny story: Microsoft Help Centre Call To Fix Your Computer

Microsoft Help Centre Call To Fix Your Computer

Microsoft have set up a new system to help their estimated three billion customers. Whenever any slowdown happens, whenever a virus makes its way onto a computer, and whenever there is any kind of crash, they are instantly notified. This then allows...
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Funny story: Met Police launches 101 number for non-urgent calls

Met Police launches 101 number for non-urgent calls

Police in London are launching a phone number for calls that do not require an urgent response. I tried the system out today to see how it worked. The call went something like this. 101 Ring ring, ring ring, ring ring,…………………………………………….ring ring. Hello, you are through to the police non emergency help line; please select one of the following options. If you see someone breaking into a...
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Funny story: Cellphones Now Used More for Goofing Off Than for Calls

Cellphones Now Used More for Goofing Off Than for Calls

Liza Colburn uses her cellphone constantly. She taps out her grocery lists, records voice memos (e.g. walk Fido, break up with that loser Frank), listens to music at the gym, tracks her caloric intake and posts frequent updates to her Twitter and Fa...
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Funny story: A Phone Call from Mom Increases Stress Nearly as Well as a Slap

A Phone Call from Mom Increases Stress Nearly as Well as a Slap

A slap from Mom might sound painful, but new research shows that just hearing her voice can initiate the same sorts of biochemical responses - even when Mommy Dearest is communicating by phone. The human body produces the hormone cortisol as a re...
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Funny story: Vitali Klitschko calls Haye "Gay"

Vitali Klitschko calls Haye "Gay"

Weeks after the news David Haye had pulled out of his fight with Brother Vladimir, Vitali has been on the Rampage calling David Haye "Gay". He said "I'm sick of hearing about this no mark Englishman - he knocks out that big bum Monte Barrett and...
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Funny story: Most Idiotic Nuisance 999 Calls of 2008 Revealed

Most Idiotic Nuisance 999 Calls of 2008 Revealed

A Smegmadale Jewish priest, Rabbi Sheldon Scrunt, dialled 999 when staff at Manchester Airport's W H Smuts bookstore would not allow him to use the toilet, then subsequently shit kittens when the plods turned up and arrested him for making a nuisance...
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Funny story: Hoax calls bring about end of the world

Hoax calls bring about end of the world

Sydney, 1st Feb, 2013 - Two hoax calls that were made to US President Sarah Palin and Pakistan President Arif Zardari last night brought an end to world civilization after these calls triggered off a nuclear holocaust resulting in probable death of o...
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Funny story: Florida Congresswoman Hangs Up On Obama

Florida Congresswoman Hangs Up On Obama

Miami, Florida: When a man sounding remarkably like President-elect Barack Obama placed a call to a Florida congresswoman Wednesday, she just assumed it was another crank call. So Republican Rep. Ileana Ros-Lehtinen hung up. But, the Miami Herald...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin duped by Russell Brand's "I shagged your daughter Bristol" phone call

Sarah Palin duped by Russell Brand's "I shagged your daughter Bristol" phone call

Juneau, Alaska - (Satanic Sluts Mess): GOP vice presidential wannabe Sarah Palin has been duped by a prank phone call from Russell Brand telling her he shagged her daughter Bristol. Brand, 33, said the experience was cathartic and that he was tire...
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Funny story: Palin Duped by Hilarious Prank Call from Fake French President and Agrees to Hunt Baby Seals

Palin Duped by Hilarious Prank Call from Fake French President and Agrees to Hunt Baby Seals

WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- Republican VP candidate Sarah Palin was fooled by a prank call Saturday from a Canadian comedian impersonating French President Nicolas Sarkozy who told her she "would make a good president someday," and asked her if she wa...
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Funny story: Police seek thousands of bogus callers

Police seek thousands of bogus callers

There were many reports this evening of children as young as 5 demanding money with menaces at locations across the UK. Police Officer Hal O'Ween said "I think these reports are very unlikely. There are very strict laws in this country about minor...
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Funny story: That Dreaded 3:00 AM Call

That Dreaded 3:00 AM Call

The red phone rings at the White House at 3:00 AM. Cindy McCain answers. "Hellooo, who the heck is calling at this hour?" Mrs. McCain sits up on the bed in the Master Bedroom. The President sleeps peacefully, curled up next to her. "Mrs. McCain, I must speak with your husband. The Venezuelans have in invaded Colombia…" the man sounds urgent. "Is this another sales call?" she interrupts...
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Funny story: City of Ventura, CA finding creative ways to make money*

City of Ventura, CA finding creative ways to make money*

(Could-Be-Anywhere, USA) - Officials with the city of Ventura, CA have found some remarkably creative ways to make money even in these desperate economic times. Christie Weird, Mayor of Ventura, claims that recent efforts to make money such as cha...
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Breaking News...

Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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