ATLANTA GA (AP) The Chick-fil-A fast food chain announced yesterday that it would be dropping its popular "Waffle Fries" from its menu and replacing them with a new fried potato product.
At a press conference, Chick-fil-A spokesman Ted Haggard ex...
MANILA, PHILIPPINES (Acme World News) -- Buddhists appeal to the Movie and Television Review and Classification Board (MTRCB) to remove the channel of American televangelist Pat Robertson from cable listings.
The appeal was made after the controve...
Recently on Pat Robertson's 700 Club television show Robertson showed a video of his host Kristi Watts asking former Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice what her favorite Thanksgiving food is. Rice told Watts that it is a helping of macaroni and cheese. After viewing the video, Pat Robertson and Watts, who is black, had the following exchange.
Robertson: "Is that a black thing?"
Watts: "It is...
Reporter: "Do you think that Christians should get involved in the protests going on down on Wall Street?"
Pat Robertson: "In my opinion, these protester down there on Wall Street are just plain rebellious. Christians should have nothing to do with anything like that. It'll just give us all a bad reputation."
Reporter: "So you are saying that you don't think that Jesus would have had anythin...
Special to Spoof - Excited by Republican/Tea Party wins in Tuesday's midterm elections, televangelist Pat Robertson has decided to expand 700 Club membership by offering free tickets on the Rapture Express. The Rapture Express is similar in design to...
In a surprising announcement today, television evangelist Pat Robertson announced that he supported the legalization of gay marriage for the citizens of Mexico. On his television program, The 700 Club, Robertson explained his position. "Legalizing ga...
Five years ago, Pat Robertson suggested the United States government assassinate Hugo Chavez.
Because the United States government has not done this, Pat Robertson is heading down to Venezuela to do the deed himself, he has packed an AK-47, 1000 r...
SPECIAL TO INS - On Thursday, more than 100 filthy people from Long Island were treated to a luncheon hosted by Fox News CEO Rupert Murdoch. The festivities were held in a corner of Murdoch's estate normally used by his dog, Hypocrite.
In an effo...
In a strange twist, the giant oil slick invading the Gulf Coast has blamed the capitalist pimp and preacher, known as Pat Robertson, for creating it.
"I don't know what everyone is so upset about." said the humongous oil slick, when we finally cau...
Pat Robertson, asking for the spirit to fill him, instead got Lenny Bruce. All hell broke loose when he started cursing uncontrollably on the 700 Club. The show was not running on delay as something of this nature had never happened before, and there...
Taking advantage of the recent Supreme Court ruling affirming that corporations have all the rights of individuals, Aetna Insurance and News Corp were married in small, private ceremony at the Hamptons estate of musician Billy Joel, a mutual friend o...
The Reverend Pat Robertson has announced on his 700 Club program that he will be selling "Curse Passes" to his viewers. "We have seen in Haiti the havoc that can be reaped by God when a land is cursed. Therefore, we have reached a deal with God and w...
WASHINGTON: Something has happened in the 'name of Christianity' in America. It has brought the mentally ill and psychologically disturbed demons to the limelight.
In fact, American atheists are saying - IF - one truly believed in the existenc...
(Los Angeles-CA) An insider has revealed to me that "American Idol", may be considering "700 Club" founder evangelist Pat Robertson to replace Simon Cowell.
My informant claims the information came from an e-mail that was leaked by an "American Id...
Billionaire evangelist Pat Robertson admitted today that he made a deal with Satan for worldly success.
"You ask how I know that the Haitians made a deal with the devil?" he said to his radio audience, "Well it's because the Devil Himself told me.
In the news today we find out where Pat Robertson and Rush Limbaugh find the source of their reports, yes that's right it's the Devil. Pat Robertson spilled the beans by reporting this himself.
It seems the aging minister knows the Devil personal...
Weird, South Carolina-- A major earthquake registering 6.66 on the Rictor Scale destroyed the house of Reverend Pat Robertson early today. The unusual quake struck just before dawn and only affected the minister's house. No injuries were reported.
Spilling the details of a private conversation had between himself and former president George W. Bush, Pat Robertson tells reporters that the current economic state is a result of God's punishment for Bush enjoying a personal "Wank" in the privacy o...