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Pastor Gives Shocking Advice On How Mainline Churches Can Survive

Funny story: Pastor Gives Shocking Advice On How Mainline Churches Can Survive

The "message" printed below was leaked to JSwift News Service. It was faxed and e-mailed as an attachment to mainline protestant ministers throughout the United States and Canada. The minister who wrote it, Cotton Mather, intended it to be confidential. If you read between the lines its text is quite shocking. It is re-printed here word for word: A MESSAGE TO MY FELLOW CLERGY FROM HOLY G...

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For some, being a Christian is becoming a pain in the butt

Christian churches, faced with declining memberships, have hit upon a new strategy for bringing in the sheaves: domestic discipline. The premise of the new program, Pastor Dave Spanky explained: "Spare the rod, and spoil the wife." The use of s...

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US Pasta A Hit In Iran

Funny story: US Pasta A Hit In Iran

Pasta made in the United States is going down very well in Iran according to news media outlets, with Iranian supermarkets and grocery stores signing an 8 year deal to ensure that US made pasta stays in the country for the foreseeable future. Acco...

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Pastor Calls 911 To Help Him Out Of Handcuffs And A Ball Gag

Funny story: Pastor Calls 911 To Help Him Out Of Handcuffs And A Ball Gag

911 operators were surprised and a bit shocked when a caller requested help from a situation he'd gotten himself into. The 911 operator answered the call: 911 Operator Can I help you Caller (In a muffled voice) I'm stuck in handcuffs and I can't get out 911 Operator I'm sorry I couldn't understand what you said, could you repeat yourself. Caller (In a muffled voice) I'm stuck i...

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Breaking news…

Inspector General’s Report Is Out

Much like a school report card, the Inspector General’s report is out and James Comey received an F for failure. Who’ve guess? Because he gave the world Donald Trump, he should have received a Z.
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