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Funny story: Pastor Gives Shocking Advice On How Mainline Churches Can Survive

Pastor Gives Shocking Advice On How Mainline Churches Can Survive

The "message" printed below was leaked to JSwift News Service. It was faxed and e-mailed as an attachment to mainline protestant ministers throughout the United States and Canada. The minister who wrote it, Cotton Mather, intended it to be confidential. If you read between the lines its text is quite shocking. It is re-printed here word for word: A MESSAGE TO MY FELLOW CLERGY FROM HOLY G...
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Funny story: For some, being a Christian is becoming a pain in the butt

For some, being a Christian is becoming a pain in the butt

Christian churches, faced with declining memberships, have hit upon a new strategy for bringing in the sheaves: domestic discipline. The premise of the new program, Pastor Dave Spanky explained: "Spare the rod, and spoil the wife." The use of s...
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Funny story: US Pasta A Hit In Iran

US Pasta A Hit In Iran

Pasta made in the United States is going down very well in Iran according to news media outlets, with Iranian supermarkets and grocery stores signing an 8 year deal to ensure that US made pasta stays in the country for the foreseeable future. Acco...
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Funny story: Pastor Calls 911 To Help Him Out Of Handcuffs And A Ball Gag

Pastor Calls 911 To Help Him Out Of Handcuffs And A Ball Gag

911 operators were surprised and a bit shocked when a caller requested help from a situation he'd gotten himself into. The 911 operator answered the call: 911 Operator Can I help you Caller (In a muffled voice) I'm stuck in handcuffs and I can't get out 911 Operator I'm sorry I couldn't understand what you said, could you repeat yourself. Caller (In a muffled voice) I'm stuck i...
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Banks will close even earlier on Shortest Day

Banks already close too early for most people's convenience. They will close at 11 am, on the shortest day, this year 'because we can 'says Exec.
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