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Government in Trouble

Funny story: Government in Trouble

Following a Rush of Wind, causing a great stink in the Parliamentary Chamber, an embarrassed Tory Government has issued pegs to all members attending debates. Some MP's complained that 'The Ruddy Rush of Wind' was coming from the posterior of the...

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Editorial: May Attacks Syria

So after PM May decided “fuck it” and bombed the shit out of another country on tenuous evidence (where have we heard this before) she now fears a public backlash. The main shame is that she won’t be receiving said “back lashes” across her back with a glass encrusted whip. The carrion eyed cunt completely misjudged the public appetite for more wanton slaughter from above and now fear repercussi...

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Boris Blames

Back and to the Left news and Boris Johnson have something in common. Both of us like to make up wildly inaccurate stories to discredit or embarrass others. However where we are a pair of idiots travelling around the country singing stupid songs he i...

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Miliband Money Worries

David Miliband (the brother of the bacon sandwich guy) has apologised for the MP’s expenses scandal. In which tonnes of MP’s thought “fuck you” to the tax payer and claimed on everything they could. £100 breakfasts, Grey Goose vodka for dictators and...

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April Fools

Funny story: April Fools

Unlike some less reputable news outlets we at Back and to the Left news don’t “toe the line” when it comes to traditional pieces. In other words we don’t make up a fake news story just because it’s the first of April. So we caught up with what’s goin...

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Boris and the Mail

Foreign Secretary, Boris Johnson, has blasted Virgin Railways for banning the Daily Mail. Or as we at Back and to the Left news refer to it as "A Rag for people who love racism to have a wank over". Boris, who looked like he'd been drinking but he a...

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Mayday Failday

Embattled Prime Minister, Teresa May, has claimed she has "the full support of the cabinet" and the table and dining room chairs we guess. Mrs May, who was sat on what looked like a tub of vipers, said: "The country needs calm leadership and t...

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Conservative Party "ran out of human MPs years ago"

Funny story: Conservative Party "ran out of human MPs years ago"

An anonymous worker at Conservative Party HQ has admitted that there hasn't been a human Tory MP since 2001 when Lord Cockles died with an orange up his arse. Since then all Conservative politicians have been either reanimated corpses, robots, or Fra...

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Faecal slime monster Gove to rejoin UK cabinet

Funny story: Faecal slime monster Gove to rejoin UK cabinet

After almost a year in exile on the back benches, faeces-covered slime monster Michael Gove has returned to a UK government position. He was fired from the cabinet last year for attempting to osmose Boris Johnson. When asked how he had spent the last...

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The British people are tired of political games

Funny story: The British people are tired of political games

LONDON- Conservatives lose majority in British Parliament, and the public says enough is enough with political games. The outcome - a positive turn for the general public as groups of Brit's join a new political organization, "New Britannia Progre...

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Running through wheat fields to be new Olympic Sport

Funny story: Running through wheat fields to be new Olympic Sport

Following her humiliating defeat at the hands of the British electorate, British Prime Minster Teresa May is looking for a new pastime, to while away the worries of missing important discussions, not turning up for meetings, not having a decent polic...

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"I Should Be Able To Defend Myself In Parliment" Says US President

Funny story: "I Should Be Able To Defend Myself In Parliment" Says US President

US President Trump demanded an audience with Parliment after PM Theresa May banned his hair from entering the UK. Reacting angrily in a series of Tweets, he bashed May and the 1.8 million petition signers who called for a ban on Trump. "I shoul...

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Jeremy Corbyn forced to sit on the floor due to lack of seats in the House of Commons

Funny story: Jeremy Corbyn forced to sit on the floor due to lack of seats in the House of Commons

WESTMINSTER, LONDON - Current leader of the Labour Party, Jeremy Corbyn, was forced to sit on the floor of the House of Commons due to a lack of seats it emerged this week. Posting a video of himself seated on the floor he said that the House was...

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New British government unveiled

Funny story: New British government unveiled

After weeks of chaos following the referendum on whether Britain should tell the rest of the world to fuck off or not, the dust has finally settled. A new UK government is in place and ready to go ahead with implementing "fuck off". Under new prim...

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9th Circle of Hell or No 10 Downing Street: Politics of Trust Makes Much Needed Return to UK

Funny story: 9th Circle of Hell or No 10 Downing Street: Politics of Trust Makes Much Needed Return to UK

A British Politician has set out his unifying principle of bring the trust back into British Political Life. "And its because I am so completely trustworthy," says the unidentified politician, "that I am just the man for this particular role."...

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Boris Joins Labour

Funny story: Boris Joins Labour

Boris Johnson has joined the Labour Party. He told reporters that he was going to apply for the leadership of the Party as soon as Jeremy Corbyn made way for him. 'He should do the decent thing' said Boris 'resign and leave the field for me.' Mome...

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Tories Have Next Election Slogan

Funny story: Tories Have Next Election Slogan

The Tories are planning ahead for the next election. They think the EU referendum could make life pretty difficult and feel sure they can beat Corbyn any day. This slogan is a winner and has already had a trial run although it is having some probl...

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Bookmakers Open Betting on Savile Inquiry

Funny story: Bookmakers Open Betting on Savile Inquiry

NB:The following was written one day before Tony Blackburn got it in the neck from the Beeb. The Chief CEO at Chapbrooks betting firm is a retired army major. Our sports reporter at "U-R-FKD" magazine called around to see him to explain Chapbrooks...

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Name Calling Trump

One thing about Trump, no one will ever call him simpatico!
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