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Funny satire stories about Paedophilia

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Littlejohn Revives Spectre of Yewtree: Let Socrates Rest in Peace! (2/2)

Last time, Richard Littlejohn boldly and courageously vindicated the honour of some boring, dusty Athenian smart-arse that nobody gives a crap about. Nope! I don't mean that postmodern ivory tower casino economics dude from Syriza, but if the cap fits… Oh wait, that was a bit stereotypically "right-wing" wasn't it? Must be catching, huh? Yes, in my last column, I was long-windedly holding...

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Savile Inquiry - Bookies Tighten the Odds

Funny story: Savile Inquiry - Bookies Tighten the Odds

Bookies in the UK are now taking a more level headed approach to the Jimmy Savile inquiry and are offering the following odds in the case. Odds Against politicians appearing in the dock on paedophilia charges resulting from inquiry. (1) One politician appearing.... 33/1. (2) Two politicians appearing... 50/1. (3) More than two... 1000/1. (4) Member of the cabinet appearing...2000/1. (5)...

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Hostage Drama at Nottingham Junior School

Funny story: Hostage Drama at Nottingham Junior School

Police responded with dogs, helicopter, and ARV (Armed Response Vehicle) to a call for help, from the Some Saints Junior School this morning at 0928hrs. They sealed off all roads surrounding the school, apart from the one to the bookies. A stat...

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Peter Tatchell: "Not all sex involving children is unwanted, abusive & harmful"

Funny story: Peter Tatchell: "Not all sex involving children is unwanted, abusive & harmful"

Hypocritical pope basher and militant gay rights leader, Peter Tatchell, has sensationally come out claiming that - based on his say-so - paedophilia is now acceptable, normal and okay. Obviously, since Tatchell is a militant homosexual who spends his life ramming it down peoples throats (often literally); he is lionised by the likes of Channel 4, BBC, Labour and numerous other lefties. If you'...

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Mandelson For Pope

Funny story: Mandelson For Pope

Arch spin doctor Peter Mandelson, famous for pulling the strings and managing the Macchiavellian machinations of the recently-defeated New Labour government under Tony Blair and Gordon Brown, has stirred up a few political hornets and set the chatter...

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Pissed off Pope Issues Don't Ask, Don't Tell Mandate to Media

Funny story: Pissed off Pope Issues Don't Ask, Don't Tell Mandate to Media

Breaking news out of Vatican City has the Pope at the very core of the sex abuse scandal that is rocking the Roman Catholic Church, and the Pope is none too pleased about the fact that he can do little to quell the suspicions. Evidently, writing a...

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Cardinal gives interview re the amazing paedo church.

Funny story: Cardinal gives interview re the amazing paedo church.

Speaking today from his North African "Ministry for wayward hot looking prepubescent boys" Cardinal Arsay O'Toole has given the first candid interview by any senior member of the catholic church about the recent paedo scandals enveloping them . "Firstly" he began "You cant seriously imagine a group of grown men go around in dresses, dont marry, and choose to live together just for shits and gi...

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Children of Men - Paedo Horror!

The world's paedophiles have voted 2006's Children of Men their scariest film of all time. Based on a novel by P.D James and starring Michael Cain, the story is set in a dystopian near future when for some unknown environmental reason, the planet'...

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Morph faces sexual assault allegations from 'underage' co-star Chas

Funny story: Morph faces sexual assault allegations from 'underage' co-star Chas

Eighties TV star Morph is the latest celebrity to face investigation over sensational claims that he sexually abused co-star Chas during the making of his popular 80s kids TV programme. Chas, now 34, was below the legal age of consent at the time, ag...

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Britains Worst Paedophile Released Again in Second Blunder

Funny story: Britains Worst Paedophile Released Again in Second Blunder

Britain's most wanted paedophile, arrested yesterday In Hove, has once again been released in error by police in what is being described as the second worst blunder in police history.

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British Paedos To Have Special 'Holiday Camps' In Thailand

Funny story: British Paedos To Have Special 'Holiday Camps' In Thailand

British paedophiles heading to Thailand will in the future be housed in 'special holiday camps' currently being built by Thai developers.

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Nonce-sense

Funny story: Nonce-sense

Paedophiles as young as 16 have been caught having sex with girls only 16 years old it was revealed today on reliable news source 'Cash In The Attic'. This shock revelation comes after recent allegations that a History teacher in Upper Jimsho...

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Paedophiles sue London Fashion Week

Funny story: Paedophiles sue London Fashion Week

Paedophiles4Justice, the ultra-powerful lobbying group, has announced a law-suit against London Fashion Week following their ban of models under 16.

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Breaking news…

National Park Service Rewrites Statue of Liberty Plaque

"Give me your strong, your rich, your workers yearning to breathe capitalism. Send no homeless, impoverished, or those seeking refuge from MS-13 to me. I want no trash to tarnish our golden door."
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