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Funny satire stories about Obesity

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Funny story:  HoHo's under fire

HoHo's under fire

Gerald Reisenback, once the Production Coordinator at the Hostess Bakery Plant in Hot Springs, Arkansas, revealed during an employment interview with Homeland Security in Washington, D.C. that since the last HoHo was produced in the plant his life ha...
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Funny story:  Motor cars in UK getting bigger

Motor cars in UK getting bigger

The average size of a family motor car in Britain has increased by over 30 per cent during the first three months of this year, according to road surveys carried out by teams of weight watchers and nosey-parkers. In 2011 and 2012, the average car...
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Funny story:  New White House Study Links Guns and Obesity

New White House Study Links Guns and Obesity

President Obama disclosed today, in a speech made in Yuma, Arizona before a group of culinary students at the Taco Institute of America, that recent studies on obesity, have directly contributed obesity to gun use in our country. "When a person has a...
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Funny story:  Finally, Some Good News For Obese People

Finally, Some Good News For Obese People

After years of being bombarded with statistics about the risks of obesity, overweight people are finally receiving some good news. A new study by the US Coast Guard reveals that fat people are better floaters than thin ones. "No doubt about it,"...
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Funny story:  Lardarse Mayor 'behind borough's potholes' say outraged residents

Lardarse Mayor 'behind borough's potholes' say outraged residents

London - The grossly obese Mayor of an Inner City borough is being blamed for an outbreak of pavement potholes and highway sinkholes by fed up residents of Camden. Their worries started when obesity poster-girl, 30-stone Heather Johnson, began sit...
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Funny story:  New Yorkers draw line in the sand

New Yorkers draw line in the sand

New York NY - Police attempted to restore order today in Times Square amid a tumult of rioting fat people. Spokesperson Ms. Phat Derrierey explained why protest had turned to violence. "It's that ban an large sugary drinks. We all decided that e...
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Funny story:  Arkansas Orders All Full Frontal Female Nudity Men's Magazines Burned

Arkansas Orders All Full Frontal Female Nudity Men's Magazines Burned

LITTLE ROCK - Several Arkansas citizens action groups have threatened to protest in the nude in order to bring attention to the out-of-control publication and distribution of X-rated men's magazines showing full frontal female nudity. Mavis Lorett...
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Funny story:  Parents skipping so children don't go hungry

Parents skipping so children don't go hungry

Many children in poor families are not eating proper meals because most of the food is eaten by their over-weight parents. These parents are now being ordered to skip meals and take up skipping instead so that their starving kids will have a bit m...
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Funny story:  Apple surgically extracted from Rush's posterior

Apple surgically extracted from Rush's posterior

Washington DC - After announcing the success of his "make it fail" program, Rush celebrated on air by swallowing a whole apple. At first he felt fine. Then the listeners heard sirens as Rush was rushed to the hospital for surgery. Rush is in fine...
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Funny story:  NASA reveals why Americans and Brits are obese

NASA reveals why Americans and Brits are obese

NASA's global gravity survey satellite launched last month has revealed why Americans and the British are classified as becoming more obese than other nations, while continents like Africa have more skinny people. "They have mapped in fine detail...
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Funny story:  Big Oil tycoons' post-Sandy pledge of $10 million for each pound of ass-lard that Chris Christie loses in next 12 months

Big Oil tycoons' post-Sandy pledge of $10 million for each pound of ass-lard that Chris Christie loses in next 12 months

New Jersey - "And a further $10 million for each pound that stays off for the following year," is how the couple's spokesperson put it as the news broke that homeless post-Sandy New Jersey residents stand to benefit from millions of dollars in hurric...
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Funny story:  Six months before Mayor Bloomberg's soda ban takes effect, high-volume "Soft-Drink Speakeasies" appear all over New York City

Six months before Mayor Bloomberg's soda ban takes effect, high-volume "Soft-Drink Speakeasies" appear all over New York City

Brooklyn--Less than five days after New York City's Board of Health voted 8-0 in favor of Mayor Bloomberg's ban on sugary drinks larger than 16oz., "soda-pop speakeasies'' began sprouting up all over the five boroughs. "It started as a joke...
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Funny story:  Fat Kids Are A Problem

Fat Kids Are A Problem

A fascinating study has concluded that 56% of mums don't know what their kids weigh. All of this after watching another government funded study waste even more money! Back and to the Left approached a Government scientist, offered him an Aero and got...
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Funny story:  NASA's Mars rover criticised for being overweight

NASA's Mars rover criticised for being overweight

For many years, nations have sent vehicles to the Moon, Mars and other bodies to explore them, take pictures and even collect samples. But there is a worrying trend in robotic space vehicles - they are becoming heavier, leading to warnings of an obes...
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Funny story:  Fighting Obesity:  NYC Mayor Bans Double D Breasts from Breast-Feeding

Fighting Obesity: NYC Mayor Bans Double D Breasts from Breast-Feeding

Dozens of New York City hospitals are instructing mothers of newborns about the myriad benefits of breast milk and to urge them to breast-feed their infants instead of resorting to substandard formulas. "Not only is it healthier than commercial alte...
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Funny story:  Obama Administration Introduces the NOFAT Program

Obama Administration Introduces the NOFAT Program

Washington DC: White House Press Secretary Carney announced a new Obama administration initiative to reduce obesity in the USA in the next four years via the No Obese Fat American Taxpayer (NOFAT) Program. President Obama got the idea for the NO...
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Funny story:  Fears for Olympic Torch's Regent's Canal barge trip as Camden Mayor 'tips the scales at around 35 stone'

Fears for Olympic Torch's Regent's Canal barge trip as Camden Mayor 'tips the scales at around 35 stone'

London - The latest leg of the Olympic Torch relay is looking doomed amid elf n safety fears for its Regent's Canal lap of honour. The grossly obese Mayor of Camden insists on accompanying the Games totem despite predictions 'she'll sink the barge...
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Funny story:  Bloomberg to Set Sights on Little Italy in Anti-Obesity Campaign

Bloomberg to Set Sights on Little Italy in Anti-Obesity Campaign

After easily pushing through his ban on sugar sodas as part of his War on Obesity, New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg is now considering closing down the popular restaurant district of Little Italy. Bloomberg claims the historic area's regula...
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Sherlock Actor Investigates Cast

Benedict Cumberbatch drilled the Star Trek cast and successfully deduced that his stolen peanut butter and jelly sandwich was taken by Zachary Quinto.

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