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Funny satire stories about Nigella Lawson

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Nigella Turned Back at Airport - but Visa then granted America's Purity and Morality Saved Just in Time

A legitimate online flight booking to L. A. by F.B.I's most wanted T.V. cook Nigella Lawson was used to alert Captain America yesterday. The Superhero swooped down to confront and humiliate the highly lethal English Lady. With nothing better to...

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Who Knew Nigella Lawson Was On The Grassy Knoll?

Funny story: Who Knew Nigella Lawson Was On The Grassy Knoll?

Who knew that cooking princess Nigella Lawson was on the grassy knoll, driver of the white Fiat Uno, hunted elephants for their ivory with a machine gun, kept Osama bin Laden hidden in her Aga for several years, the cause of the sub-prime mortgage cr...

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Nigella Lawson, star of The Taste cookery show, swears blind it was 'just baking powder'

Funny story: Nigella Lawson, star of The Taste cookery show, swears blind it was 'just baking powder'

New York, USA - "Uh, Cream of Tartar or bicarbonate of soda?" a former cookery show producer queried today as news broke that the Brit TV chef who famously wowed US cable audiences with her The Taste show alongside NY chef Anthony Bourdain may have b...

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Roast badger on Nigella's menu tonight

Funny story: Roast badger on Nigella's menu tonight

London - Spatchcocked roast badger a l'Anglaise kicks off Nigella Lawson's daft cookery show tonight accompanied by char-grilled split beaver stuffing and a fiery jus. The dish is among viewers' top requested roadkill classics as austerity bites...

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Doomsday cult warns about Nigella's coq au vin

Funny story: Doomsday cult warns about Nigella's coq au vin

London - A shadowy Illuminati offshoot has red carded domestic goddess Nigella Lawson's new spring chicken recipe. Barking Seventh Day Adventist Dentists' Allotment Society has banned her 'summer solstice spatchcock chicken nuggets in a red wine j...

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"Nigella Lawson Didn't Really Eat An Aborted Pig Foetus" - Claims Verity Warbling-Trollblog

Funny story: "Nigella Lawson Didn't Really Eat An Aborted Pig Foetus" - Claims Verity Warbling-Trollblog

Claims by American celebrity chef Anthony Bourdain, that 'tasty' Brit chef Nigella Lawson claimed to have roasted and eaten an aborted pig foetus, have been roundly ridiculed by SEN's latest acquisition, Ms Verity Warbling-Trollblog. Apparently, t...

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Nigella Lawson, Stein, Bikers Head Up New Cookery Assault

Funny story: Nigella Lawson, Stein, Bikers Head Up New Cookery Assault

Voluptuous TV cook Nigella Lawson is set to lead BBC2's new batch of cookery shows. TV cookery's most famous décolletage is set to front Nigellisima, six half-hour programmes featuring Italian influenced dishes. Meanwhile, the whiny west country p...

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Nigella Lawson: "We're All A Bit Lesbian!"

Funny story: Nigella Lawson: "We're All A Bit Lesbian!"

Buxom TV sexpot cook, Nigella Lawson, claims that all women have a bit of the lesbian about them. Recalling her days at boarding school, the busty domestic goddess said she had a crush on a fellow pupil. Although she says she's never had any gi...

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Nigella Lawson Caught Smuggling Imported Knockwurst

Funny story: Nigella Lawson Caught Smuggling Imported Knockwurst

Security screeners at LAX noticed something amiss when foodie Nigella Lawson came through their security line readying herself for a trip back home to London after spending a whirlwind couple of weeks in America. After noticing Ms. Lawson acting a...

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Nigella To Fry Bacon Topless In 3D In Beeb Sensation!

Funny story: Nigella To Fry Bacon Topless In 3D In Beeb Sensation!

BBC bosses remained tight lipped today over rumours that yummy 'chef' the luscious Nigella Lawson is to be approached to shoot a show which will depict her topless, frying bacon in sizzling hot fat - in 3D It is thought that the BBC powers that be...

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Jamie & Nigella's Recipes for M.P.'s

Funny story: Jamie & Nigella's Recipes for M.P.'s

Jamie Oliver and Nigella Lawson have been commissioned by Parliament to provide recipes to the Parliamentary Canteen. You can print these recipes yourself and prepare the meals so you can feel just like a Member of Parlament. Jamie's Turd in the Hole. Take a pickled turd from the cabinet and fry with a piece of bread with a hole in which to place the turd. After 5 minutes add a sprin...

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Nigella Lawson Burns Left Nipple In Chicken Noodle Soup Mishap

Funny story: Nigella Lawson Burns Left Nipple In Chicken Noodle Soup Mishap

Unconfirmed reports are coming in to the Skoob Entertainment News office, that Nigella Lawson, the TV chef with the big bazookas has been involved in an unfortunate kitchen mishap when her left nipple became scalded as she bent over a pan of hot chi...

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Nigella Lawson's New Series To Boost Bra Sales

Funny story: Nigella Lawson's New Series To Boost Bra Sales

Bra sales at big girls' underwear stores like Bravissimo are set to rocket as top totty TV cook Nigella Lawson began a new TV series last night. Ms Lawson's new series, Nigella Kitchen, launched a 13-week run with an episode featuring such delight...

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Nigella Lawson Gives Her Breasts A Rest - The Delicious Miss Dahl Steps In

Funny story: Nigella Lawson Gives Her Breasts A Rest - The Delicious Miss Dahl Steps In

Whilst nobody could sensibly argue that the BBC got it wrong in combining sex appeal and cooking, it could be argued that the BBC are struggling to maintain the standards they set so efficiently. Nigella Lawson became the first sex cook, and a jol...

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Nigella Lawson produces MILF recipes

Funny story: Nigella Lawson produces MILF recipes

Nigella Lawson has produced a series of what she is calling MILF dishes. Talking about cooking poultry, she said: "Basically there's nothing a slightly older bird responds to better than a good stuffing. I recommend a large spicy sausage. Alternat...

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Nigella Lawson's "lesbian stew" recipe causes controversy

Funny story: Nigella Lawson's "lesbian stew" recipe causes controversy

Nigella Lawson has caused controversy by creating a so-called lesbian stew. The recipe reads something like this: take the meat of two fresh, plump birds (no fat though), preferably the breasts and thighs and rub oil into them gently but firmly. A...

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Nigella helps to lick rampant inflation

Funny story: Nigella helps to lick rampant inflation

It seems that not only have the TV cookery shows shown us how to eat great tasting food, they have taught us to eat frugally too. Delia Smith's programme showing how to 'cheat' at cooking and Nigella Lawson's show which includes many off-the-she...

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Nigella's Kids are Fed Up

Funny story: Nigella's Kids are Fed Up

It was revealed last night that the children of celebrity TV chef Nigella Lawson are fed up with their mother's cooking. Speaking on a rare interview on CBBC, Cosima Lawson (14) and Bruno (12) complained that life in the Lawson household was not like...

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Breaking news…

Trump Jr. Says That He Always Wanted to Be Separated From His Parents

That's why he can't understand the consternation at the border with kids being taken from parents.
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