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Funny story: Newt Gingrich Says Rush Limbaugh Is Crazy For Wanting To Eliminate NASA

Newt Gingrich Says Rush Limbaugh Is Crazy For Wanting To Eliminate NASA

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Former Speaker of The House Newt Gingrich is furious with his fellow Republican Rush Limbaugh and has called him crazy for his recent anti-NASA comments. In mid December Limbaugh was quoted as saying that the United States needs...
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Funny story: Newt Gingrich not related to Amphibians, authorities confirm

Newt Gingrich not related to Amphibians, authorities confirm

After extensive research the American Amphibious Society has concluded that Newt Gingrich is not a member of the family Salamandridae, of order Caudata, otherwise commonly known as the newt. The groundbreaking research article was published in the...
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Funny story: Newt Gingrich Divorcing Wife To Marry Sofia Vergara

Newt Gingrich Divorcing Wife To Marry Sofia Vergara

Former Speaker of the House and failed Republican Presidential nominee Newt Gingrich is reportedly dumping his current and 3rd wife Callista to marry "Modern Family" television star Sofia Vergara. In a special hour-long episode of "Entertainment T...
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Funny story: Some Hard-Hitting Election Comments From Noted Politicians

Some Hard-Hitting Election Comments From Noted Politicians

Here are some statements, comments, quotes, observations, and remarks that some noted politicians and non-politicians have recently stated regarding the recent presidential election. • Mitt Romney - "Well it sure looks like I wasted millions and millions of my own damn money for nothing, absolutely nothing." • Newt Gingrich - "My goodness, the Democrats came out of the friggin woodwork and R...
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Funny story: Paul Ryan Says He Will Run For President In 2016

Paul Ryan Says He Will Run For President In 2016

KEYSTONE, South Dakota - Paul Ryan took a trip up to South Dakota to visit Mount Rushmore and to get a little rest and relaxation from the grueling presidential race he has just lost. Ryan told GOPicky Magazine's Amos Soursuckle that he had no ide...
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Funny story: Newt Gingrich: Obama Will Kick Romney's...Hairdo

Newt Gingrich: Obama Will Kick Romney's...Hairdo

ST. BARTS, West Indies - Former speaker of the house Newt Gingrich and third wife Callista were down in the Caribbean relaxing and getting away from the tons and tons of political campaign ads. According to a highly placed source with Gingrich's p...
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Funny story: Romney To Buy Wife Ann a Clothes Washer for Mother's Day

Romney To Buy Wife Ann a Clothes Washer for Mother's Day

Likely Teapublican presidential candidate Mitt Romney revealed that he will be purchasing a new clothes washer for wife Ann this week. "I think it's the ideal gift for a stay-at-home mom like Ann," said Romney during a break from the campaign trail.
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Funny story: Newt Quits Race, Vows to Conquer Russia

Newt Quits Race, Vows to Conquer Russia

Today Newt Gingrich dismissed his run for the US presidency as "trivial" and "not befitting my vast talents and expertise." In a long, sparsely attended press conference, the former Speaker of the House vowed "to move on to more important things, na...
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Funny story: Political Facebook - Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich Discuss Mitt Romney

Political Facebook - Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich Discuss Mitt Romney

POLITICAL FACEBOOK Rick Santorum: Hey Newt are you there? 9:01 a.m. Newt Gingrich: Yeah Rick. I just finished having a piece of toast with some expensive butter that I have imported from Holland once a week. 9:04 a.m. Rick Santorum: Wow! I betcha it's good. 9:07 a.m. Newt Gingrich: Rick, it is so darn good, I actually hate to eat it. 9:11 a.m. Rick Santorum: Say Newt I just want...
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Funny story: Santorum bows out. Gingrich disappears from Google Search!

Santorum bows out. Gingrich disappears from Google Search!

When Rick Santororum bowed out of fhe presidential race yesterday, the media immediately began seeking a comment from Newt Gingrich. He was nowhere to be found! As the journalists frantically tried to find him, one enterprising reporter did a Google...
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Funny story: Political Facebook - Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul, and Sarah Palin

Political Facebook - Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, Ron Paul, and Sarah Palin

POLITICAL FACEBOOK Newt Gingrich: Hi Rick. Well old pal it looks like I'm done. I don't have a snowballs chance in hell of beating "Old Mittens." 10:01 a.m. Rick Santorum: I hear you Newton. I am feeling the same way. I don't think I've been this disappointed since back in high school when I asked the head cheerleader, Sadie Sue Von Buttermilk to the prom and she told me that she wanted to...
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Funny story: Glenn "Crybaby" Beck States That He Will Cry A Lot of Tears If Mitt Romney Is The GOP Presidential Candidate

Glenn "Crybaby" Beck States That He Will Cry A Lot of Tears If Mitt Romney Is The GOP Presidential Candidate

POCATELLO, Idaho - Glenn Beck was in Pocatello visiting one of the largest potato museums in the world, The Spud Land Museum & Gift Shop. He was accompanied by his 4-year-old niece Daisy Parpaletti, who looks just like him except she's a lot smaller, she's a girl, and she does not cry anywhere near as much as her uncle. Beck was asked by Mistletoe Bulova, a very pretty reporter with The...
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Funny story: Whose Bed Have Newt's Boots Been Under?

Whose Bed Have Newt's Boots Been Under?

Regardless of Newt Gringrich's prospects for winning the Republican presidential nomination, it's impossible to dispute that the ladies looooove Newt! And it's not just the ladies - nearly every time Gingrich is scheduled to speak, he ends up doing so to a packed house. Gingrich's passion is clearly contagious, as indicated by his sold-out debates and standing-room-only campaign events. In fac...
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Funny story: Gingrich & Santorum to combine as one...will run as Attila the Hun!

Gingrich & Santorum to combine as one...will run as Attila the Hun!

Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum stunned the political universe today as they announced they will combine their campaigns and run as one. "We will campaign and govern as Attila the Hun," stated Gingrich. A reporter from the Associated Press called...
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Funny story: Former Kamikaze pilot hired by Gingrich!

Former Kamikaze pilot hired by Gingrich!

In a surprise announcement this morning, Newt Gingrich announced that he had hired an Ex Kamikaze pilot as his campaign manager. Newt introduced the ninety-two year old pilot Yoshiro Metamora and explained his strategy in a few words. According...
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Funny story: My Worst Nightmare: I Was Married to Newt Gingrich

My Worst Nightmare: I Was Married to Newt Gingrich

I'm coming clean and you are the first to know. If you are a frequent Dating Dementia reader, you'll recall that I seldom remember my dreams. Scientists have established that everyone dreams. I'm sure I do. Yet, for some unknown reason, upon waking I remember nothing about the weird wanderings of my midnight mind. Ignorance is indeed bliss. My bliss bubble was popped early this morning...
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Funny story: Political Facebook - Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, and Ron Paul

Political Facebook - Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum, Newt Gingrich, and Ron Paul

POLITICAL FACEBOOK Rick Santorum: Hey Mitt how's your Etch A Sketch doing? 8:14 a.m. Mitt Romney: It's doing great Ricky boy. Do you still really feel that if I ran against President Obama that Republicans should vote for him and not me, a GOPer. 8:19 a.m. Rick Santorum: Do skunks stink? Is Lake Michigan wet? Does Lindsay Lohan have hundreds and hundreds of freckles? Of course I do "Hai...
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Funny story: Newt Gingrich Gets Hold of Romney's Etch A Sketch and Shakes up the Republican Presidential Race

Newt Gingrich Gets Hold of Romney's Etch A Sketch and Shakes up the Republican Presidential Race

The entire Republican presidential race took an unexpected turn when Newt Gingrich got hold of Mitt Romney's etch a sketch and shook the crap out of it. The incident occurred at a Houma, Louisiana gumbo bar called Mumbo Dumbo's Gumbo where both cand...
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