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Drones Don't Get Invited to City's New Year's Eve Bash

Funny story: Drones Don't Get Invited to City's New Year's Eve Bash

Outrage was in evidence among drones (y'know, those flying thingies that come in all sizes and shapes) when they learned they were not invited to the massive party thrown by the city of White Plains, north of New York City. More specifically, the d...

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Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

Funny story: Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

New York City, NY - Local universities reported an uptick in popularity in Turf Management Studies, particularly for college applicants with Italian-American backgrounds. Students who major in turf management learn how to maintain the turf on sp...

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NY squirrel is a Terminator!

Funny story: NY squirrel is a Terminator!

Arnold Schwarzenegger would be proud of a squirrel terrorising tourists in New York as they step off the ferry boats after visiting the Statue of Liberty! The squirrel perches on branches waiting to pounce on any Japanese nutter who dares offer ot...

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Drone Crashes Through Window, Lands in NY Apartment

Funny story: Drone Crashes Through Window, Lands in NY Apartment

Yikes! Are the aliens from outer space arriving? No, not yet, anyway. There's an interesting backstory here. A reporter from The Spoof, one skilled in talking and understanding "drone talk," has gotten the scoop from the nosy drone. Here's the skinny. Apparently the drone was flying near the apartment house when he noticed that one of the residents was watching the movie "Star Wars,"...

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Man amputates foot: no need to match sox

"It came to me one Sunday afternoon awhile back" said Martin Duffy of the Kingsbridge section of the Bronx "when I finished a load of laundry and started spreading the goddam socks around on my kitchen table, like I've done hundreds of times before"...

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Munchkins from the Wizard of Oz Demand Recount of 1939 Oscar Race

Funny story: Munchkins from the Wizard of Oz Demand Recount of 1939 Oscar Race

"Gone With The Wind" won for Best Picture that year. Supposedly. But who knows, say the Munchkins. The recent error in the announcement of Best Picture in the 2017 race is the catalyst for the action of the little people, who have commented, "Hey, mi...

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Tony Bennett Releases Yet Another Fucking Christmas Album

Funny story: Tony Bennett Releases Yet Another Fucking Christmas Album

New York, New York - Proving to the world once again that he is, indeed, still alive, crooner Tony Bennett releases the 500th Christmas album in his nauseating yule tide collection. This latest one is called, I'm A Christmas Whore - There, I Said It!...

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New York City Cockroach Finally Gets His Own Apartment

Funny story: New York City Cockroach Finally Gets His Own Apartment

After a lifetime of couch-surfing, squatting in abandoned tenements, and even sleeping in overflowing trash bins when he couldn't find some sympathetic soul to put him up, New York City cockroach Chuck Felsin has finally gotten his own apartment.

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Man shouts "yahtzee" at inappropriate time

Funny story: Man shouts "yahtzee" at inappropriate time

Service on the IRT 1 line was disrupted for nearly an hour today as police and their k9 partners searched for an elusive figure accused of yelling "Yahtzee" with no evidence of actually playing the game while traveling on a northbound Broadway local.

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After Brexit, Texas mulls "Texit"

Funny story: After Brexit, Texas mulls "Texit"

DALLAS - Emboldened by Great Britain's decision to exit the European Union, the Texas legislature is gearing up to consider a bill that would allow the Lone Star State to exit the United States. Texas State Sen. Adam Philbin said the bill, calling...

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Minnie Mouse Arrested in NYC's Times Square

Funny story: Minnie Mouse Arrested in NYC's Times Square

Say it isn't so, Minnie. Say it isn't so. Unfortunately, though, it IS so. The entrepreneurial little mouse was a little bit TOO entrepreneurial and was arrested for battling a tourist over the size of a fee for a photo session. Minnie refu...

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LIKE Me...Or Else!

Funny story: LIKE Me...Or Else!

An example of social media run amok was reported this week in a small town twenty miles north of NYC. Several people reported that they were "mugged" by a masked man who emerged, brandishing a gun, from the bushes. He instructed the victims to pr...

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With Two You Get Egg Roll

Funny story: With Two You Get Egg Roll

JAMESTOWN - If New York property owners complain about a water chestnut problem, they are not talking about Chinese takeout. The European water chestnut, an invasive aquatic plant is not the same as the water chestnut which can be purchased in can...

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Old Man Born Again Every Day by "Old River East" (a.k.a. East River)

Funny story: Old Man Born Again Every Day by "Old River East" (a.k.a. East River)

While many consider miracles a thing of the past, New York man Kellogg Tracey experiences spiritual magic every single day, courtesy of the "Old River East" - more commonly known as the East River. "That Old River East is a boon to my spirit and...

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President Andrew ("Old Hickory") Jackson Visits NYC

Funny story: President Andrew ("Old Hickory") Jackson Visits NYC

When he found out he would no longer be on the front of the $20 bill, President Jackson was NOT a happy camper. St. Peter gave him a one-day earth pass (apparently the first of several), so Jackson could vent about this disappointing news. Fir...

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Thy sins forgiven - go forth and urinate

Mayor Bill de Blasio and NYPD announced that consumption of alcohol, urinating in public or littering will henceforth be considered as minor offenses. People will no longer be shackled at their ankles or handcuffed to a fire hydrant. The only gro...

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President McKinley Disgusted to Lose His Mountain

Funny story: President McKinley Disgusted to Lose His Mountain

Former President McKinley returned from the dead (he was assassinated in 1901) yesterday and held a press conference in NYC's Grand Central Station. He wants the world to know how disgusted he is that the U.S. has changed the name of North America's...

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Hope Stupidly Springs Eternal for Struggling New Yorkers

Funny story: Hope Stupidly Springs Eternal for Struggling New Yorkers

According to recent polls, over 70 percent of New York City residents remain ridiculously optimistic about their futures despite overwhelming indications that nothing in their personal or professional lives will ever change for the better, thereby pr...

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Breaking news…

United States Stupidity Quotient

The S. Q. increased 16% in the first year of Trump's term of office. It now stands at 69%.
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