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Funny story:  Middle, High Schools in Arkansas Issued Firearms

Middle, High Schools in Arkansas Issued Firearms

Attention mass killers, you better not go into an Arkansas school as each child has been issued a weapon that is under their desk. The ammo can be unlocked quickly by the teacher or room monitor. Of course, the early grades will only have stun gun...
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Funny story:  NRA Calls for SOS (Shoot on Suspicion) Laws Nationwide

NRA Calls for SOS (Shoot on Suspicion) Laws Nationwide

FAIRFAX, VA--In a legal move to avoid having to prove that an armed person felt physically threatened when discharging his weapon, Wayne LaPierre, CEO and Bullshitter-in-Chief for the National Rifle Association, is now calling for SOS, or Shoot on Su...
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Funny story:  Obama In Duel With The NRA  And LaPierre - Obama Loses!

Obama In Duel With The NRA And LaPierre - Obama Loses!

Many believed it would be a dramatic and historic meeting between President Obama and NRA leader Wayne LaPierre when they met at a press conference in New York this afternoon. After a long standing feud (minus guns but about guns) between the two for...
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Funny story:  US Senators in fact finding mission to UK's House of Lords Rifle Range

US Senators in fact finding mission to UK's House of Lords Rifle Range

Washington - A delegation of 46 United States Senators who famously rejected proposals last year for gun background checks will be visiting an exclusive shooting gallery in the basement of the British Parliament's upper house, the House of Lords, ne...
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Funny story:  Head Of NRA Shoots Self Is In Hospital

Head Of NRA Shoots Self Is In Hospital

Pastor John Slaughter today was handed the NRA gavel to preside over the most powerful pro-gun lobby in the U.S. His sudden assent to be the gun group's top man was occasioned by former CEO, Wayne La Pisse, severely wounding himself through careless...
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Funny story:  The Things That Turned Obama's Hair Grey

The Things That Turned Obama's Hair Grey

There are many factors within the fray, that have turned our Presidents hair to grey. Pundits, done-thats and patriots galore seek to sabotage him evermore. These are the things that have turned our fearless leader's head from black to grey in only five short years: Having Military Generals whisper to him that 'they would do a Kennedy' on him if he so much as tried to close Guantanamo Ba...
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Funny story:  Sheriffs Don't Want  Data On Insane

Sheriffs Don't Want Data On Insane

WASHINGTON - - - The Obama Administration today expanded access to mental health data in background checks for the federal system. Under a new rule, paranoid schizophrenics, brutal lunatics who have been imprisoned for violence, insane child abu...
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Funny story:  NRA Wants Machine Guns, Grenades in Schools

NRA Wants Machine Guns, Grenades in Schools

A student at a Colorado school shot and wounded two students, one seriously police say. , The shooting occurred at Arapahoe High in Centennial, The NRA has responded to the tragedy by reiterating its demand that every school child in the U.S. carry...
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Funny story:  Enraged Senators Schumer, Cruz Come Close to Blows on Senate Floor

Enraged Senators Schumer, Cruz Come Close to Blows on Senate Floor

WASHINGTON (AP) - On the eve of the massacre of children at Sandy Hook Elementary in Newton, The National Rifle Association won another victory. The victory shows the enormous power and control of the association over obedient members of the U.S. Se...
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Funny story:  On Eve of Newton Massacre Anniversary, NRA Advocates "No Child Without Gun"

On Eve of Newton Massacre Anniversary, NRA Advocates "No Child Without Gun"

In a press release issued today, just before the anniversary of the Newton School Massacre,The National Rifle Association has issued a statement advocating that every child in an American classroom be armed with a weapon starting with kindergarten. T...
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Funny story:  "I See Dead People!" Causes Wayne LaPierre To Build His Own Winchester House.

"I See Dead People!" Causes Wayne LaPierre To Build His Own Winchester House.

Wayne LaPierre, chief face for the National Rifle Association, has been secretly burdened by the fear of having helped to suppress laws that would have controlled the guns that have been ravaging American society. Knowing that he was instrumental in...
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Funny story:  Specialty Themed Houses of Horror

Specialty Themed Houses of Horror

In the latest craze to hit the Halloween crowd horror fans are creating Haunted Houses for very specific groups. Each is tailor made to scare the bone marrow out of their target audience. Gun Nut Horror House- Specially made to scare the beejeebee...
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Funny story:  The NRA's LaPierre Gets To See Obama's Bad Self

The NRA's LaPierre Gets To See Obama's Bad Self

It was a phone call that President Obama didn't want to make, but he knew he would eventually have to. He also knew that it would do little good, but that it had to be made anyway. So, on Wednesday, he did. And he was right. "Good day, Mr. LaPierre. How are you doing today?" "Oh, I was OK until you called." "Well, I am sorry to hear that. I think it is time for us to have a little chat."...
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Funny story:  President Obama Now Says That He May Enact A Law Banning Bullets

President Obama Now Says That He May Enact A Law Banning Bullets

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama held a White House news conference and he informed the members of the press that he is going to have to show the Republicans that he, Barack Obama, was elected president of the United States and not the nation's pro...
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Funny story:  Wayne LaPierre:  "Guns Don't Kill People. Crazy Fucks with Guns Kill People."

Wayne LaPierre: "Guns Don't Kill People. Crazy Fucks with Guns Kill People."

Amid renewed talk of more stringent background checks after the latest massacre at the Washington D. C. Navy Yard, Wayne LaPierre was seen walking around the capitol, with his pockets bursting with congressmen and women, quipping to a reporter: "Gun...
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Funny story:  Gun Companies Realize More Profit Made Being Patriotic To The Taliban Than To The U.S.

Gun Companies Realize More Profit Made Being Patriotic To The Taliban Than To The U.S.

A major financial shift has occurred within the gun manufacturing section of the United States Corporate industry. A huge surge has come about in the number of guns and ammunition being clandestinely sold to the Mid East terror organization Al Queda.
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Funny story:  Ted Nugent Threatens to Visit States That Haven't Yet Adopted Stand Your Ground Laws

Ted Nugent Threatens to Visit States That Haven't Yet Adopted Stand Your Ground Laws

Waving a bottle of Wild Turkey in one hand, a 9mm Glock pistol in the other, and wearing a T-shirt that reads, "Like Prayer, Gun Control Means Using Both Hands," the asshole-in-chief of the NRA threatened to visit any state that hasn't yet adopted St...
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Funny story:  Florida OKs Hand Grenades for "Stand-Your-Ground" Defense

Florida OKs Hand Grenades for "Stand-Your-Ground" Defense

Special to TPN - Florida Governor Rick Scott today signed into law an expansion of his state's controversial "Stand-Your-Ground" statute 776.013. Those with so-called "carry" permits for handguns will be allowed to conceal on their persons not more t...
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