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Funny satire stories about Murder

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Funny story: Sleep Deprived Attorney Incriminates Client During Pretrial Hearing

Sleep Deprived Attorney Incriminates Client During Pretrial Hearing

K.C.,MO: The 1998 cold case murder of 17 year old Martin Keif seemed to be on it's way to a resolution until a well respected defense attorney brought everything to a screeching halt. Jared O'Connell Esq. (aka Mr. Not Guilty) is one of the most f...
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Funny story: 6-year-old entrepreneur jailed for deaths stemming from "Puppy Chocolate Factory" business

6-year-old entrepreneur jailed for deaths stemming from "Puppy Chocolate Factory" business

BRUNSWICK, GA - When 6-year-old Jamie Applesmith opened her business "Puppy Chocolate Factory," the reaction was astonishing. More than a dozen of her closest family members and neighbors came knocking at her door to support her business, many of who...
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Funny story: Trump Inspired to Follow Webb's Lead in Admitting Murder on National Television

Trump Inspired to Follow Webb's Lead in Admitting Murder on National Television

Las Vegas, Nevada - At the Democratic debates in Las Vegas last night, the closing question posed by moderator Anderson Cooper was a unique one. Each candidate was given 90 seconds to identify the enemy they were most proud of making during their lif...
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Funny story: Son's Innocence Lost, Parents Found Guilty

Son's Innocence Lost, Parents Found Guilty

Ted Peters, the school counselor at Saint Zeke's Elementary School near Squaresville, Missouri had a hunch that something was amiss. The school board administration warned faculty and staff members to be on high alert for suspicious-looking students...
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Funny story: Death by Lambrini

Death by Lambrini

A mother and daughter from London have been accused of 'a Christmas day plot to murder London bus driver with poisoned Lambrini'. Jacqueline Patrick, 54, has been charged with attempting to murder her husband Doug, now 72. Allegedly she slipped an...
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Funny story: Brave Holiday Makers Defy Terrorists by Continuing to Sip Cocktails by the Pool.

Brave Holiday Makers Defy Terrorists by Continuing to Sip Cocktails by the Pool.

In the global War Against Terrorism, there are one group of combatants that refuse to give in to the Islamic Extremists who threaten to destroy their way of life: The British Holiday Maker. With the latest tragedy in Tunisia, where 18 British sun...
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Funny story: Man Walking Dog In Woods Doesn't Find Murder Victim

Man Walking Dog In Woods Doesn't Find Murder Victim

A man walking his dog in a wooded area near Evesham has told friends how, despite expecting to any minute, he didn't find a mutilated corpse, the victim of some gruesome revenge killing or spontaneous, frenzied 'rape-gone-wrong'. The man, Ernest N...
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Funny story: Deep Blue doo-doo

Deep Blue doo-doo

The most powerful computer in the world has been indicted in the US for murder. It is alleged that the machine killed a janitor who worked at IBM. Jilberto Einstein took the job at IBM last Christmas. The pumped-up calculator, known as Deep Blue-i...
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Funny story: Pensioner Gunned Down in London

Pensioner Gunned Down in London

Paddy O'Flynn had had enough it seems. He had decided to apply to his local housing authority for help with his rent having vacated his old house and moved into a rented apartment in Clapham Common, South London. That is where his troubles began. His wife Caitlin takes up the story. "They sent him a form to fill in. It was thick as the London Times. For three months he tried to figure it o...
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Funny story: Rifle Club to send Members to Kill in Pakistan

Rifle Club to send Members to Kill in Pakistan

WASHINGTON - appalled by the death of a women after a beating by her family in Pakistan, Wayne La P'nis, Head Phallus of the Rifle Club of America (RCA) offered to send assault weapons to that country. "There are many honor killings of women in...
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Funny story: NY man wrongfully acquitted sues state for $25M

NY man wrongfully acquitted sues state for $25M

A Brooklyn man wants a million dollars for every year the state did not lock him up in prison. Dean Dork, who spent almost a quarter-century at liberty and free after being found not guilty for a crime he committed, has hit the state with a $25 m...
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Funny story: Men Walking Dogs In Woods Know Its Only A Matter Of Time Before They Discover Murder Victims

Men Walking Dogs In Woods Know Its Only A Matter Of Time Before They Discover Murder Victims

Describing it as 'bound to happen sooner or later' male dog walkers acknowledged Saturday that they shall all, at some point or another, discover a murder victim buried deep in the woods where they walk their dogs. Dog owners of all ages across th...
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Funny story: Fowl pay suspected in bizarre murder case

Fowl pay suspected in bizarre murder case

Police have rounded up several angry chickens, following the discovery of the badly-tattered body of an elderly woman last week. After forensic investigations, Detective Inspector Ivor Nyedeer reckoned that 81-year-old Gladys Sawloaver had been th...
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Funny story: Mistrial Declared on Murder Charge in Loud-Music Trial

Mistrial Declared on Murder Charge in Loud-Music Trial

TAMPA BAY, FL. - A Caucasian man was found guilty of three counts of attempted murder for the fatal shooting of an African-American teenager over loud music, but a mistrial was declared after the all-black jury broke out their boom-boxes and started...
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Funny story: Zoo kills baby giraffe, feeds it to homeless people

Zoo kills baby giraffe, feeds it to homeless people

There has been an outcry tonight after an 18 month old giraffe, the product of incest behind zoo bars, was put down with a bolt gun before being chopped up and sent to charity kitchens feeding vagrants and other homeless people. Young Marius had b...
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Funny story: Is Kim Jong un having a cull of relatives?

Is Kim Jong un having a cull of relatives?

Already demonstrating his ruthlessness by executing both his uncle and his one-time mistress, not to mention numerous other North Koreans who have incurred his displeasure but could Kim Jong Un, the country's new dictator, have purged even his own wi...
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Funny story: Cannibal Cop From Germany Blames Horse Meat Lasagna

Cannibal Cop From Germany Blames Horse Meat Lasagna

DRESDEN, Germany - A cannibal cop arrested for the killing of a man he met online is blaming his crime on the fact that he ate horse meat lasagna purchased and eaten last year and claims it gave him mad cow disease. A representative from Findus,...
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Funny story: FCC Announces Phone Service Subsidy for Murderers

FCC Announces Phone Service Subsidy for Murderers

The Federal Communications Commission today took long-overdue steps to ensure that long-distance rates made by convicted felons are just, reasonable and fair. Studies have determined that law-abiding taxpayers will pick up the cost. The Commis...
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