Las Vegas - An abandoned rats' nest teetering on foreclosure is how critics of pageant coiffure have summed up some contestants' hairdos ahead of this year's Fathers Day extravaganza.
"That backcombed peroxide big hair look is still incredibly pop...
"Nah, that bitch ain't all that," Miss Mildred Gates, the Second Runner-up and winner of Miss Hideously Ugly Arkansas, bitterly complained during a post-pageant dust-up involving several of the contestants. "I'll be takin' this to the top!" she angr...
While the current Miss Michigan and now Miss USA title holder, Rima Fakih remains embroiled in controversy over her past photographic exploits, millions of men across America now reluctantly admit to having intimate relations with Miss Michigan.
Rima Fakih, the new Miss USA, won a stripping contest sponsored by Detroit radio station, it is being reported this morning.
"It's true, I've seen the pics. They will be all over the net and in the tabloids by tomorrow morning", an insider told us...
LAS VEGAS - The winner of the 2010 Miss USA is Miss Michigan, Rima Fakih [pronounced: FUK-Ing].
The native of Arabia beat out 48 other American girls for the coveted title of Donald Trump's pageant. One of the judges, Minnesota Vikings quarterback...
Los Angeles, California - As the now former Miss USA's scheduling records will eventually prove, if ever they are released under this politically charged atmosphere not experienced since the Salem witch-burning saga during the colonial era of pre-Ame...
London, England - Drinknation.com has just the changed the famous cocktail drink "Sex on The Beach" to "Carrie Prejean Spontaneous Boob Shots." All the ingredients are pretty much the same: 2 oz. Cranberry Juice, 2 oz. Orange Juice, 2 oz. Pineapple...
The winner of the Miss USA pageant, is in danger of losing her crown because of her controversial opinion about the Sci-Fi classic film "Alien Versus Predator."
In a recent interview, while discussing one of her favorite movies, she answered a que...
LOS ANGELES - Miss California says that she is so mad that Perez Hilton ambushed her during The Miss USA telecast with his 'gay question' that she has decided to move to Wyoming where there are no gay people.
Perez Hilton who is an avowed 'gay guy...
Hollywood, California - In an interview on the "Today" TV show infamous celebrity gossip blogger/political activist/expert beauty queen judge, Perez Hilton, said people named Jesus offend him.
Speaking on behalf of Jews, Muslims and Atheists ever...
Las Vegas, Nevada - Folding to political correctness faster than a Chinaman can fold shirts at a Chinese Laundromat in Chinatown, Miss California US runner-up, Carrie Prejean, announced today that she no longer opposes same-sex marriages. Her stateme...
Guantanamo Bay, Cuba - Miss Universe and Miss USA have taken a firsthand look at the U.S. prison for terrorism suspects and 7-11 gas station owners at Guantanamo Bay.
The beauty pageant winners took part in a VIP tour to entertain American militar...
Vietnam - (Bananaskin Mess): Future contestants in the Miss Universe pageant will be offered a state-of-the-art hex detox after Miss USA sponsors complained their luscious lovely's ass-over-tit tumble on the catwalk was the result of an ongoing c...
Nha Trang, Vietnam - (Sore Ass Mess): The Curse of Agent Orange was blamed today as comely Texan Crystal Stewart tripped and fell flat on her ass during the Miss Universe pageant in Vietnam today.
Hollywood, California - From the producers that brought you "The Osbournes," "Survivor" and "Fear Factor" now comes: "The Osmonds." That is if they accept the highly lucrative contract offer, as they are said t...
Washington, D.C. - Taken aback by the speech Miss Teen USA finalist, Lauren Caitlin Upton, gave at last Friday's competition, President Bush offered her a job as his official speechwriter.
Cancun, Mexico - (Ass Mess): Karma? Like revenge, a dish best eaten cold, wet and V-E-R-Y windy.
Mexico City - (Ass Mess): Miss Universe fourth runner up Rachel Smith has spoken for the first time about the 'bizarre Carlos Castaneda moment' in Mexico City last Monday immediately before the inexplicable fall on her ass in front of an esti...