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M.O.D pay chicken farmers millions as jet pilots scramble their eggs!

Funny story: M.O.D pay chicken farmers millions as jet pilots scramble their eggs!

The Ministry of Defence has been forced to "scramble" their fighter jet flights over chicken runs in the UK because distressed chickens have been running for their lives as helicopters, fighter jets, and other UFO's (for chickens everything flying is...

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Nix-names banned from Defence Procurements

Funny story: Nix-names banned from Defence Procurements

Amid concerns that the new F35 'Lightning II' fighter jet can be exploded by lightning, and that the 'Rivet Joint' aircraft may be barely airworthy the armed forces have now been instructed to adhere to a stricter naming convention. Cuthbert Pomfr...

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UK Defence Chiefs caught in the cross-fire as top US General forced to pull out

Funny story: UK Defence Chiefs caught in the cross-fire as top US General forced to pull out

In the light of recent revelations concerning General Patraeus, senior members of UK Armed Forces have admitted that they have also been caught with their pants down, frequently having to make a 'hasty tactical withdrawal'. Part of the problem is...

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Britain has no sailors for our subs - emergency recruitment planned!

Funny story: Britain has no sailors for our subs - emergency recruitment planned!

The United Kingdom armed forces have been decimated by recent cuts with unforeseen consequences. An average nuclear-powered hunter-killer sub requires a crew of 76 and a Trident sub needs a crew of 142 men and women. The above numbers do not in...

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Captain Mainwairing: "Dad's Army Territorials to be expanded, to make up for cuts to regular soldiers."

Funny story: Captain Mainwairing:

Walmington-On-Sea, East Coast, England: Some of the British population may be surprised to learn that in one part of England, martial law is still in place. Captain Mainwairing is still in charge, still believing an imminent invasion of the Nazi hordes is on the cards. Now that Liam Fox, the Defence Secretary, has announced the Army will be cut by a fifth from its current size of 102,000 to ar...

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HMS Ark Royal lost in the Post

Funny story: HMS Ark Royal lost in the Post

Further embarrassment has been heaped on the Royal Mail today, when it emerged that the historic aircraft carrier, HMS Ark Royal, had been lost in the post. The retired former aircraft carrier had been listed for sale on the auction website, Ebay...

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MoD UFO Workers sacked

Funny story: MoD UFO Workers sacked

As part of government cuts, the department in the Ministry of Defence that deals with all of the crap sent in by the public about their UFO sightings has been closed. The department has been operating since 1950. The need was identified when membe...

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Army Apologises For E Mails

Funny story: Army Apologises For E Mails

A red faced Ministry of Defence spokesman has issued a public apology to 38 soldiers who were advised by e mail that they were being made redundant. The official stated "It is with great regret that we used this unprecedented form of communique to...

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David Cameron to introduce new Nick Clegg shield to the MoD

Prime Minister David Cameron is set to introduce a new Nick Clegg shield to the Ministry of Defence (MoD), as part of the government's commitment to the armed forces. The new Nick Clegg shield has been successfully trialled by David Cameron since...

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Ministry of Sound to merge with Ministry of Defence

Funny story: Ministry of Sound to merge with Ministry of Defence

Following on from recent widespread spending cuts, the coalition government have been looking at many different ways to make ends meet. Whilst at the same time as bringing an end to many quangos and non-departmental public bodies, they have also...

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Navy Shame Over Kids' Coup

Funny story: Navy Shame Over Kids' Coup

The Ministry of Defence fashed fresh embarrassment today as it was revealed that HMS Ark Royal, the Royal Navy's most iconic vessel, was seized temporarily by a group of schoolchildren while moored off Gibraltar. Captain of the Ark Royal, Corneliu...

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Swingers put security of MoD in jeopardy

Funny story: Swingers put security of MoD in jeopardy

Panic broke out at the MoD yesterday, when it was revealed that members of staff had been participating in, and I quote 'lewd swinger orgies'. Desks were cleared and hard drives wiped, as officials with police back-up scoured the Ministry building...

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British Troops "Woefully Under Protected"

Funny story: British Troops "Woefully Under Protected"

Gordon Brown has vehemently denied that the sponsorship deal with ToyMaster, Britain's largest chain of Toy Superstores, has put the gallant British Troops at risk in Afghanistan. Brigadier General Alex Dent has come out in support of his troops.

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MoD Axe Plans To Sell-Off Snatch Land Rovers To The Public!

Funny story: MoD Axe Plans To Sell-Off Snatch Land Rovers To The Public!

Chief-of-Defence-Staff; General Sir Jock "the bayonet" Stirrup-Pump has withdrawn plans to sell off useless Army Snatch Land Rovers after a series of disastrous tests, involving housewives in a Sainsbury's car-park in Basingstoke! The "steel cof...

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MoD in Copyright Dispute over RAF

Funny story: MoD in Copyright Dispute over RAF

MoD officials have now released a statement in the latest round of their long running copyright claim over their globally recognised RAF roundel. The roundel which has long been synonymous with ageing rock group the who, is said to be popular with mo...

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69 MoD laptops found at the bottom of the Diana Fountain

Funny story: 69 MoD laptops found at the bottom of the Diana Fountain

Hype Park - (Reuterus & Bad Ass Mess): The Ministry of Defence has admitted that 69 laptops containing details of all the soldiers that Princess Diana had ever shagged have somehow ended up at the bottom of the Diana, Princess of Wales Memorial Foun...

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Royal Navy resizes

Funny story: Royal Navy resizes

A 'leaked' UK government document shows that the Royal Navy is to be resized.

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Name Calling Trump

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