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Dunkin Donuts Says Minimum Wage Hike Will Lead To Mechanization of Donut Hole Making

Funny story: Dunkin Donuts Says Minimum Wage Hike Will Lead To Mechanization of Donut Hole Making

St. Louis, MO - For years, Wilbur Jones of St. Louis has been working the graveyard shift at Dunkin Donuts, making donut holes with his dick. "They hired me because the circumference of my wang when erect was the size of a donut hole," Jones said,...

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Fast-food customers safe "for now"

Funny story: Fast-food customers safe "for now"

DEE TROIT, MI - Disgruntled fast-food workers have united, in Dee Troit, of all places, walking off their jobs in support of unionization, after union reps, armed with baseball bats and megaphones, promised them $15 and benefits for cleaning restroom...

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Walton Family Checks into Rehab for Wealth Addiction

Funny story: Walton Family Checks into Rehab for Wealth Addiction

Bentonville, Arkansas -- In a shocking admission that surprised half of the world's population, the surviving members of the Walton family announced earlier this week that they are checking into the Betty Ford Clinic to treat a debilitating wealth ad...

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Pot Now Sold To inmates In Colorado Prisons

Funny story: Pot Now Sold To inmates In Colorado Prisons

In urban centers such as New York City and Los Angeles, the sale of e-cigarettes in jails and prisons is forbidden. But throughout rural America prison guards are supplementing their incomes by selling there nicotine laden regular cigarette substitu...

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Ted Cruz, Wealthy Oppose Min. Wage Hike

Funny story: Ted Cruz, Wealthy Oppose Min. Wage Hike

The current federal minimum wage in the U.S. is $7.25 an hour, full time pay less than $15,000 a year, way below the poverty level. Current proposals before congress would raise the floor to $10.10 an hour. This would leave a full-time employee still far below the poverty line but would be helpful. There is now widespread public support to raise the minimum wage. That is largely attribute...

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Glenn Beck: "Minimum wage should be set at 2 cents per hour"

Funny story: Glenn Beck: "Minimum wage should be set at 2 cents per hour"

Conservative commentator Glenn Beck announced today that the minimum wage should be lowered to two cents an hour, making for gross earnings for an eight-hour work day in the United States to be set at no more than 16 cents per day. "Without overti...

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President Obama Signs Executive Order Raising Minimum Wage to $100 Per Hour

Funny story: President Obama Signs Executive Order Raising Minimum Wage to $100 Per Hour

WASHINGTON, DC - President Obama reached a compromise with Democrat and Republican leaders today and issued an executive order to raise the minimum wage from $7.25 to $100 per hour. Democrats demanded that the minimum wage be raised to $200, while...

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The U.S. Post Office Is Having To Resort To Nudity

Funny story: The U.S. Post Office Is Having To Resort To Nudity

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The United States Postal Service has found itself in the worse financial situation in history. According to official U.S. Government data reports, the USPS lost an amazingly unbelievable total of $5.2 billion during the third qu...

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Mayor Makes US City the 7-Eleventy of the US by Imposing Minimum Wage on all City Employees

Funny story: Mayor Makes US City the 7-Eleventy of the US by Imposing Minimum Wage on all City Employees

It all seemed like a ridiculous joke when the mayor of Scranton, Pennsylvania imposed a minimum wage requirement on all city employees a couple of weeks back, claiming that he needed to close a budget gap that had a couple of numbers in front followe...

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High school dropout says flipping burgers beneath dignity

Funny story: High school dropout says flipping burgers beneath dignity

SEATTLE, WA-High school dropout Tim Mitchell, 24, feels that his current job as a McDonalds fry cook and burger maker is not suited to his abilities, and does not envision a life where his lack of secondary education and work ethic are an impedim...

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Congressional Housekeeping Staff Has High Praise for Obama

Funny story: Congressional Housekeeping Staff Has High Praise for Obama

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Upon meeting Congressional leaders to discuss an economic stimulus plan with them, US President Barack Obama addressed news on the country's economy. "I've asked Larry Summers... my top economic advisor, to give me daily briefings...

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Dispossessed Americans Strike It Rich! 70 Cents per Hour Minimum Wage Raise!

Funny story: Dispossessed Americans Strike It Rich! 70 Cents per Hour Minimum Wage Raise!

Dispossessed and now homeless Americans are jumping for joy over their 70 cents per hour minimum wage raise! The $5.60 extra after 8 hours of work in the salt mines allowed Hobo Joe to buy his family of four a loaf of bread, a stick of butter and a c...

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The End of Minimum Wage

Funny story: The End of Minimum Wage

Monday was a day of mass chaos throughout the US amidst a massive fast-food worker walk-out organized by a YouTube contributor.

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Democrats Battle Over Minimum Wage: Barack Obama at $50/hour

Funny story: Democrats Battle Over Minimum Wage: Barack Obama at $50/hour

Barack Obama today announced his support for a $50/hour minimum wage, as the competition among Democrats heats up for the Presidency.

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Beckham Put On Minimum Wage

Lager cans popped in the Beckham's council flat, following the F.A.'s announcement that the England squad were to be paid the National Minimum Wage.

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