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A collection of Michael Owen's best tweets

Funny story: A collection of Michael Owen's best tweets

Since joining Twitter the former football player and now commentator Michael Owen has shared his insights into life. Find below some of the nuggets of interest- It's Friday night! Think I might treat myself to a glass of water - I deserve it Good to see out of some of the football matches played today, several of them had winners. Football on later. Hopefully we'll see plenty of ball kic...

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Football Gossip & comments 18th September 2012

Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 18th September 2012

Ace Michael Owen nets thief after watching raid on CCTV Full Story: The Sun He's got used to watching the action sitting down after being on the bench at Man United for so long... Felippe 'Big Phil' Scolari wants to return to manage in England after getting the push from Palmeires.... Full Story: Talksport Big Phil looking for a big job, I suggest he watches this space at West Ham to replac...

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Michael Owen Transfer's To Stoke's Treatment Table

Funny story: Michael Owen Transfer's To Stoke's Treatment Table

The former Manchester United, Liverpool, Real Madrid, Newcastle and England striker, 32, agreed a one-year deal with the Potters medical staff. Following Wednesday's announcement, Owen wrote on Twitter: "It's official! Deal done. I'm a Stoke playe...

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Football Gossip & comments 14th July 2012

Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 14th July 2012

Nottingham Forest's new owners want Peterborough manager Darren Ferguson, 40, to take charge of the team after they sacked Steve Cotterill Ferguson is odds on with the bookies, other names on the list include Nigel Clough, Roy Keane, Roy Keanes dog and a statue of Brian Clough the 1000/1 outsider. Michael Owen says he is still waiting for a "good opportunity" ahead of the new season, but has...

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Ferguson Rules Out Berbatov

Funny story: Ferguson Rules Out Berbatov

Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson has today ruled out striker Dimitar Berbatov. The news came as a shock to the room full of unscrupulous underhanded weasels with most viewing this as a step too far from the 69 year old Scot. Reporters...

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Michael Owen Seen At Anfield - Mystery Deepens

Funny story: Michael Owen Seen At Anfield - Mystery Deepens

The football rumour mill was buzzing this morning as it was revealed that Manchester United striker Michael Owen was spotted at Anfield yesterday by an alert fan. Liverpool officials were tight lipped when questioned about the matter, but the myst...

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Michael Owen eager to offset future medical bills with extended Man U stay

Funny story: Michael Owen eager to offset future medical bills with extended Man U stay

Out-of-contract striker Michael Owen has re-iterated his desire to offset his future medical bills by extending the amount of time he has spent in the luxuriant surroundings of Manchester United's treatment room by a further year. The 31-year-old,...

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Michael Owen announces he has taken out a super injunction

Funny story: Michael Owen announces he has taken out a super injunction

Former England striker, Michael Owen, has announced that he has taken out a super injunction. The diminutive Scouser, who is still at Manchester United despite rumours to the contrary, has not said what the super injunction is over. "Yeah," he...

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Michael Owen Comes Clean

Funny story: Michael Owen Comes Clean

Michael Owen has employed the same PR company as Wayne Bridge, Ashley Cole and John Terry in an attempt to get into the world cup squad. With the news that despite stepping down and having some girl he knew in the past sleeping with somebody he on...

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Fabio Capello invents new language of Capellese

Funny story: Fabio Capello invents new language of Capellese

England football manager Fabio Capello, who has had lessons to learn how to speak English, today decided to invent a new language instead. Speaking from FA headquarters in a chip shop off the Fulham Road, he held a press conference to give the med...

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Michael Owen ruled out for entire new season after United contract signing injuries

Funny story: Michael Owen ruled out for entire new season after United contract signing injuries

Surprise free transfer gamble Michael Owen has been ruled out for the coming season on medical grounds after breaking into tiny pieces. The England international noticed a sharp pain and discomfort in his wrist immediately after signing on the dotted...

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Manchester United Sign Paraplegic

Funny story: Manchester United Sign Paraplegic

Manchester United have stunned the football world by signing a paraplegic to replace Ronaldo and Carlos Tevez. John Cole has been signed, subject to a stringent medical, and is expected to join pre season training in Skegness. Sir Alex Whinger, lo...

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Owen recalled by Capello

Funny story: Owen recalled by Capello

Michael Owen has been called again by Fabio Capello. Unfortunately it was only to tell him that he should consider retiring from International football. Owen told a close friend, who thus in turn told me which effectively proved the lack of closen...

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Michael Owen - I quit

Funny story: Michael Owen - I quit

Michael Owen, Newcastle United's number one striker, has quit international football. The diminutive England man, with 40 goals in 89 games for his country, has decided that enough is enough. A statement today said, "It looks like I have fallen ou...

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Newcastle United Nigerian Sale Latest

Funny story: Newcastle United Nigerian Sale Latest

The Nigerian consortium hoping to buy Newcastle United has told TheSpoof.com it is serious about its bid, and has already highlighted several improvements it would like to make to the ailing Tyneside club. The man fronting the bid, a UK-based busi...

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Man City To Buy Michael Owen

Funny story: Man City To Buy Michael Owen

Manchester City, the richest football club in the world, are to break into the transfer market once again in January, to snap up the Newcastle United striker Michael Owen. Owen has become disillusioned with life on Tyneside, and the recent shenani...

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Michael Owen Takes Real Estate Advice From Michael Jackson

Funny story: Michael Owen Takes Real Estate Advice From Michael Jackson

Newcastle United and England striker Michael Owen has gone all businesslike, and has decided to build a £12million Wonderland Theme Park in the grounds of his luxury retreat on the Costa del Sol. Owen, who national team manager Fabio Capello jetti...

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Blackburn to sign the entire Liverpool team of 2001

The announcement that Paul Ince had signed veteran Robbie Fowler for Blackburn indicated the conclusion of the first part in the wily manager's faultless plan: to sign the entire Liverpool team of 2001. The entire team, including players such as...

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