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Donald Trump Seeks to Buy the Planet Mercury

Funny story: Donald Trump Seeks to Buy the Planet Mercury

Science Town, USA Donald Trump made an announcement today that he wished to purchase the planet Mercury. "I had my people do a title search and it appears that it is not owned by anyone. I therefore claim the right to purchase the planet. I should...

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Russian Satellite Spots Ants On The Planet Mercury

Funny story: Russian Satellite Spots Ants On The Planet Mercury

MOSCOW - The Russian News Agency, Vodkavich has just announced that Russia's premier satellite Siberia 7 has just sent back some astonishing photos taken of the planet Mercury. A spokesperson for Vodkavich said that 17 of the 19 photographs clearl...

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Closeup Photos Show That Saturn Does Not Have A Ring Around It, But Mercury Does

Funny story: Closeup Photos Show That Saturn Does Not Have A Ring Around It, But Mercury Does

NEW YORK CITY - A team of the world's leading space scientists have just disproved the commonly held belief that the planet Saturn has a ring around it. Team leader Dr. Heinrich Von Heinrich stated that for decades everyone has believed that Satur...

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Presidential flip-flopper heaven as Mercury goes retrograde on November 6th

Funny story: Presidential flip-flopper heaven as Mercury goes retrograde on November 6th

Washington - It's bad news for the Romney Campaign as millions of undecided American voters head for the polls under the influence of a rare astrological aspect on the day of the US presidential election. Tuesday sees Mercury, planet of communicat...

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Mercury Leak Discovered From Daybreak Presenters

Concerns grew once again on the humanity of breakfast TV presenters as strange discharges found on the well known sofas has been identified as mercury. MI6 have taken the extraordinary steps of sealing off the studio until further searches can be...

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Dimmest Bulb in the Box: Obama Presents Queen with Case of Compact Fluorescent Lightbulbs!

Funny story: Dimmest Bulb in the Box: Obama Presents Queen with Case of Compact Fluorescent Lightbulbs!

Following his flawed toast to the Queen of England following his nostalgic revisiting of his roots in Ireland, President O'bama continued his clueless knowledge of International Protocol by presenting Her Majesty with a gift wrapped case of CFL's f...

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Messenger sends back first Mercury photos

Funny story: Messenger sends back first Mercury photos

NASA's Mercury Messenger Probe has finally achieved insertion around the planet Mercury, one of the most hostile environments in the solar system. Messenger is one of NASA's usual attempts at an acronym: MErcury Surface, Space ENvironment, GEoche...

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Mercury in the body causes homosexuality (well at least in birds it does)!

Funny story: Mercury in the body causes homosexuality (well at least in birds it does)!

Over-doses of mercury found in birds (as in feathered kind) are turning them into homosexuals! A survey was made amongst a flock of White Ibises (pretty gay anyway) in Florida and their gay behaviour was caused by large amounts of mercury found in...

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Astronomers find clunkers on Mercury

Funny story: Astronomers find clunkers on Mercury

PAYSON, AZ - According to Dr. Blacken E. Ye, head astronomer at the highest telescope in Arizona Mercury is quite the "iron planet". Nasa's Messenger probe has spotted what look like crushed clunkers on the surface of the planet. These iron rich...

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The Mercury Mission

Funny story: The Mercury Mission

NASA are trying to arrange a manned mission to Mercury even although most scientists say that life could not survive on the planet because of the lack of oxygen and the intense heat. Mercury is the closest planet to the sun and if you could stand...

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Old cars contain Red Mercury, Government says.

Funny story: Old cars contain Red Mercury, Government says.

The Government has announced that cars that are over ten years old 'most probably' contain Red Mercury, a substance that many scientists say does not exist. But it is widely thought that it can be used to find treasure, ward off evil spirits or even...

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New Culinary Fad: Mercury On Everything!

Funny story: New Culinary Fad: Mercury On Everything!

Following the many corporate big pharmaceutical funded scientific reports telling us that mercury in our vaccines is highly nutritious and beneficial to our brains; many celebrity chiefs have started to add it to their dishes.

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Cost Of Living Goes Up, Cost Of Dying Goes Up More

Funny story: Cost Of Living Goes Up, Cost Of Dying Goes Up More

Never mind moaning about the cost of living, the cost of dying is set to soar!...

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Name Calling Trump

One thing about Trump, no one will ever call him simpatico!
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