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Funny story: Tybee Island Gets New McDonald's Next Door To Current McDonald's

Tybee Island Gets New McDonald's Next Door To Current McDonald's

Tybee Island: McDonald's have announced that it is to open a second McDonald's restaraunt next door to an existing McDonald's in the rather odd little town of Tybee, Tybee Island. "Big Mac lovers just can't stand being far from their favorite McD...
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Funny story: PETA Receives $100M Donation From McDonald's In Exchange For Endorsement

PETA Receives $100M Donation From McDonald's In Exchange For Endorsement

Norfolk, VA - People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, or, PETA, received a $100M donation from the McDonald's Corporation in exchange for a gentlemen's agreement that PETA will feature McDonald's menu items in PETA's advertising campaigns. Mc...
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Funny story: McDonald's Shareholders Meeting Disrupted by Nanny-State Protesters

McDonald's Shareholders Meeting Disrupted by Nanny-State Protesters

Chicago- CEO Don Thompson was challenged and often shouted down by some insistent and disruptive shareholder meeting disrupters. A belligerent Debbie Bipolaria, representative of Mothers United in Parental Neglect, accused McDonalds of using popul...
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Funny story: McDonald's Introduces "Taco" Bell Ad Featuring Burger-Coveting Illegals

McDonald's Introduces "Taco" Bell Ad Featuring Burger-Coveting Illegals

LAND OF OPPORTUNITY, ARIZONA -- In a fast food counter attack, McDonald's is launching a commercial featuring 12 everyday illegal aliens from Arizona named "Taco" Bell being arrested by authorities. "My name is Ernesto 'Taco' Bell," said one man f...
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Funny story: McDonald's Debuts Its New Burger In Honor of California

McDonald's Debuts Its New Burger In Honor of California

OAK BROOK, Illinois - The world's largest fast food chain has just announced that it has just unveiled it latest burger creation. Company spokeswoman Nancy Zabeletta said that after just being on the market for 24 hours the new McVolcanoburger is...
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Funny story: McDonald's Sales Continue To Slide - The Company May Have To Lay Off Ronald McDonald

McDonald's Sales Continue To Slide - The Company May Have To Lay Off Ronald McDonald

OAK BROOK, Illinois - The latest sales reports for the McDonald's fast food chain are in and they show a downward slide trend continuing. Golden Arches spokeswoman Nancy Zabeletta informed the news media that a lot of that has to do with the big a...
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Funny story: Jennifer Lawrence Falls At A Fast Food Restaurant

Jennifer Lawrence Falls At A Fast Food Restaurant

BEVERLY HILLS - It appears that Jennifer Lawrence is becoming more famous for her slips, trips, and falls than for her acting. "Trippy" Lawrence, as Michelle Obama has nicknamed her, is noted for having tripped at last year's Academy Award Show wh...
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Funny story: Fast-Food Employee Fired For Forgetting To Ask "You Want Fries With That?"

Fast-Food Employee Fired For Forgetting To Ask "You Want Fries With That?"

OAK BROOK, Illinois - The home office of the McDonut's Fast Food Franchise has just received a report from one of its restaurants. According to spokesperson Nancy Zabeletta, located west of the Mississippi River has reportedly fired one of its emp...
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Funny story: Nude New Yorker At McDonalds Not Doing Well

Nude New Yorker At McDonalds Not Doing Well

Whatever he was up to, an unnamed male (at present) suddenly appeared in New York McDonalds and ran into a lot of trouble. "He actually got in the back door", stated an employee that someone forgot to relock after going out back for a break. He ha...
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Funny story: Kirstie Alley Remarks That She Would Love To Own A McDonald's

Kirstie Alley Remarks That She Would Love To Own A McDonald's

BEVERLY HILLS - Actress Kirstie Alley recently appeared on The View and she told Barbara Walters that she hardly ever gets any movie scripts anymore. She noted that the last script she got was for a Portuguese film about an ex-matador who goes to...
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Funny story: McDonald's Says No To The Idea of Placing Big Mac Vending Machines In Macy's Department Stores

McDonald's Says No To The Idea of Placing Big Mac Vending Machines In Macy's Department Stores

OAK BROOK, Illinois - The world's largest fast food franchise has addressed the idea it had been developing regarding Big Mac vending machines. Company spokeswoman Nancy Zabeletta told the news media that the company had been toying with the idea...
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Funny story: Chickens Have No Nuggets But On The other Hand...

Chickens Have No Nuggets But On The other Hand...

While chickens have no nuggets the whole process of fixing the favorite McDonalds bestseller can be sickening. The mechanically separated chicken are turned into this pink goop so we can create delicious chicken nuggets and even juicy chicken patt...
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Funny story: Scientists Discover "Dumb-Ass Gene" Responsible For US' Problems

Scientists Discover "Dumb-Ass Gene" Responsible For US' Problems

Americans are largely apathetic as their country slides into third world status. The infrastructure is ready to collapse, 1 in 5 kids struggle with hunger, 18 to 32 % are in poverty (it's definitional), 40% of the national budget goes for past, pres...
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Funny story: The U.S. Post Office and McDonald's Join Hands

The U.S. Post Office and McDonald's Join Hands

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The United States Post Office Department has just announced that they have worked out a deal with the number one fast food franchise in the world; McDonald's. The USPO in an effort to bring in more revenue has agreed to put a Mc...
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Funny story: Gov. Christie to Compete in NYC Marathon

Gov. Christie to Compete in NYC Marathon

Special to TPN - Governor Chris Christie of New Jersey will be competing in the New York City Marathon to be held on November 2, 2014. Contrary to rumor, all lanes will be open on the Verrazano Bridge section of the course, but the center lane will b...
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Funny story: Honey Boo Boo Films A Commercial For Her Favorite All-Time Fast Food Restaurant

Honey Boo Boo Films A Commercial For Her Favorite All-Time Fast Food Restaurant

McIntyre, Georgia - The star of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, Alana Thompson has just finished shooting a commercial for what she says is her favorite fast food restaurant of all-time. The 7-year-old reality show star filmed a 30-minute commercial fo...
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Funny story: McDonald's Addresses The Happy Meal Rumors

McDonald's Addresses The Happy Meal Rumors

OAK BROOK, Illinois - The McDonald's Corporation wants to inform its customers that recent rumors which were tracked back to San Diego, California are positively false. Golden Arches spokeswoman Nancy Zabeletta stated that the fast food giant has...
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Funny story: KFC Will Be Selling Duck McDuckies In Order To Compete With McDonald's Chicken McNuggets

KFC Will Be Selling Duck McDuckies In Order To Compete With McDonald's Chicken McNuggets

LOUISVILLE, Kentucky - The KFC Corporation has just announced that they have partnered with the Robertson family of Duck Dynasty on a new KFC menu item. KFC Spokesperson Ty Wylerstaff stated that the huge chicken franchise chain had been looking...
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Obama... Ordinary like us.

Yesterday, President Obama was refused entry into a restaurant for not wearing a tie and later fined for double parking and... ordered to return his library books... and thrown off a tram...and...

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