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Funny satire stories about Matt Cardle

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Funny story: Matt Cardle - At Last A True X-Factor Working Class Hero Warrior

Matt Cardle - At Last A True X-Factor Working Class Hero Warrior

Six months ago, nobody had heard of Matt Cardle, but now, the humble working class Essex painter and decorator is the toast of the town, and a shoe in for the coveted Christmas number one single slot, following his dramatic X-Factor triumph in the fa...
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Funny story: Matt Cardle, Katie Waissel, Wagner: "Let's Have A Discount Card!"

Matt Cardle, Katie Waissel, Wagner: "Let's Have A Discount Card!"

Stars of this season's X Factor are demanding a new perk for contestants - high street discount cards. They believe that once the show is over, there's little left for the attention-craving wannabes. "They give so much," said one insider. "The...
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Funny story: Matt Cardle Not Gay! Shock Christmas Announcement!

Matt Cardle Not Gay! Shock Christmas Announcement!

This year's X-Factor winner, Matt Cardle, has shocked the music industry by announcing in his new book that he is not at all gay, and that he likes doing press-ups with ladies, as opposed to pumping iron. Essex lad and former painter and decorator...
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Funny story: Matt Cardle And Olly Murs Rejected For Oasis Christmas Gig

Matt Cardle And Olly Murs Rejected For Oasis Christmas Gig

X-Factor stars Matt Cardle and Olly Murs were sensationally turned down as headliners for a Christmas gig at the internationally renowned Oasis Bar And Grill in London. Entertainment Director of the OB&G, PM Wortham, admitted that owing to the...
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Funny story: X-Factor Winner Matt Cardle Has Fans In A Frenzy

X-Factor Winner Matt Cardle Has Fans In A Frenzy

The nation's music fanatics can't get enough of 2010 X Factor Winner, the casually-rumpled squeaking nincompoop Matt Cardle, writes Esmerelda Bell, Artificially-Induced Tousling and Hunched Anaemic Unshaven Slimey-Arsed Karaoke Correspondent for Toss...
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Funny story: X-Factor's Matt Cardle Wins The £1 Million Recording Contract

X-Factor's Matt Cardle Wins The £1 Million Recording Contract

LONDON - The Colchester, Essex contestant, Matt Cardle, who was mentored by Dannii Minogue has won the 2010 edition of X-Factor. Cardle, who has said that the Beatles are his favorite all-time band and Manchester United's Chicharito is his favorit...
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Funny story: X-Factor Matt Cardle's Dirty Filthy Shameful Secret Life Revealed - Shocking Exclusive!

X-Factor Matt Cardle's Dirty Filthy Shameful Secret Life Revealed - Shocking Exclusive!

Most of the TV viewing public quite correctly empathise with poor Essex painter and decorator (?) Matt Cardle off the X-Factor, because he's so humble, and because he's a proper musician as opposed to the plastic wannabes he's up against (apart from...
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Funny story: X-Factor's Matt Cardle To Release Duet With Stacey Solomon?

X-Factor's Matt Cardle To Release Duet With Stacey Solomon?

Skoob Entertainment News can exclusively reveal that plans are afoot to release a CD featuring probable X-Factor winner Matt Cardle, with Jungle Queen Stacey Solomon. Details are a little sketchy right now, but word has it that the all conquering...
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Funny story: X-Factor Saturday - Was Rihanna Wearing Knickers?

X-Factor Saturday - Was Rihanna Wearing Knickers?

Speculation has been mounting over Saturday's X-Factor, following Rihanna's duet with 'painter and decorator' Matt Cardle, as to whether or not the R&B megastar was wearing any knickers. Wearing a slinky dress, slit to the tonsils up one side,...
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Funny story: X-Factor Matt Cardle's Dark Secret Past Revealed

X-Factor Matt Cardle's Dark Secret Past Revealed

It has been revealed tonight that Matt Cardle has a dark secret past that he never wanted anyone to know about. But tonight, for the very first time, his ex-best friend Jeremy has told Spoof News about the secret betrayal that almost cost him his li...
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Funny story: Friends Say That If Rihanna Doesn't Cut The Mustard In X-Factor With Matt Cardle, He'll Probably Punch Her In The Face.

Friends Say That If Rihanna Doesn't Cut The Mustard In X-Factor With Matt Cardle, He'll Probably Punch Her In The Face.

Tonight's X-Factor final: Sources relate that comedy croaker Matt Cardle has disappeared so far up his own arse that he has intimated that if international superstar Rihanna doesn't pull her finger out in tonight's final, he'll be giving her a slap i...
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Funny story: Matt Cardle - Secret X Factor Heartbreak

Matt Cardle - Secret X Factor Heartbreak

When Matt Cardle gave his tearful rendition of The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face no-one was aware of the meaning the song held for him. But after the performance was screened a friend told the secret behind Matt's tears. "Matt's been doing a...
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Funny story: Oh no, it's the f***ing X-Factor again

Oh no, it's the f***ing X-Factor again

Yes, it's the show where the girls sing like guys and the guys sing like girls, and it's time for iThink's bitchy round-up of this evening's action. This week there were notable performances by Matt Cardle, Treyc Cohen and of course W/Vagner. "...
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Funny story: X Factor "War" Claims Rubbished By Top Academic

X Factor "War" Claims Rubbished By Top Academic

Antagonism between X Factor contestants has turned the house they live in into a war zone, claim insiders. And the in-fighting has become so bad that neighbours in the posh London suburb of Mill Hill have complained about it. "They've become Ba...
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