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Funny satire stories about Marion Jones

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Funny story: Jones Measures Up Punishments

Jones Measures Up Punishments

Disgraced track star Marion Jones has been offered two choices for her punishment on perjury charges perpetrated early last year. She must either spend six months in a low security prison or have both of her legs sawn off.
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Funny story: Marion Jones to have Garage Sale

Marion Jones to have Garage Sale

Monte Carlo, Monaco (AP) - Due to the recent hardships Marion Jones has lost everything including her house and is now living out of a boxcar in the Monaco rail yard.
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Funny story: Olympics loses Kodak sponsorship; picks up DuPont; 2012 Olympics backdrop for "Noah's Ark Animal Pills for Global Warming"

Olympics loses Kodak sponsorship; picks up DuPont; 2012 Olympics backdrop for "Noah's Ark Animal Pills for Global Warming"

New York, New York - With the use of steroids nearly running rampant by Olympic athletes, Kodak has decided its time to end its long-term association with the Olympics, which dates back to the very first games in Athens in 1896. Officially, Kodak exe...
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Funny story: Marion Jones Gives Back Medals

Marion Jones Gives Back Medals

Marion Jones has given up the five medals she won at the Sydney Olympics, days after admitting she used performance-enhancing drugs. What happens next is up to the International Olympic Committee.
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Funny story: Marion Jones guilty plea discloses method of discovery of steroids use: caught exiting the men's restroom at the Federal building

Marion Jones guilty plea discloses method of discovery of steroids use: caught exiting the men's restroom at the Federal building

Los Angeles, California - FBI agents became suspicious of Marion Jones' consistent denials that she did not use steroids during the 2000 Sydney Olympics but then they received copies of letters she sent to family and friends admitting as much. Ho...
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Man declared dead wakes up in morgue body bag

A bloody miracle, says the mortician, considering I was about to inject him with two gallons of formaldehyde

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